LPSGs new theme song

Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by naughty, Jul 1, 2004.

  1. naughty

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    Workin' up a good pot of mad!
    Here it is guys!
    It was inspired by the Beegee's classic "How deep is your love" My unoffical title of the song is "the size queens lament"

    Here are my choruses:

    "How big is your s.....g ? how big is your s.....g ?
    Yours really makes me yearn. 'Cause I'm living in a world of tools
    not to be found , I need a microscope to see,
    what they can't give away for free , lalalalalalalalalalala.

    How big is your .....? how big is your ....?
    I really can't discern. photoshopping is against the rules,
    fakes not allowed
    you know that crap just shouldn't be, does not belong, LPSG!
    Lalalalalalalalalala.

    How big is your ....? How big is your .....?
    some guys will never learn, altered states they really just aint cool
    we know by now how to discern the real from fake
    you just can't make a worm a snake!
    Lalalalalalalalalalal


    eel free to add additional verses! LOL!


    Too naughty tonight!
     
  2. naughty

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    Come on guys ,comment

    or I might have to sing this version...


    "How bad was that song? how bad that song? It really laid an egg! I was acting like a natural fool, I feel like a clown. I really wish that I could flee, its time to climb the nearest tree lalalalalalalalalala
     
  3. Imported

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    Hapi Papi: I know you got an enormous one
    I wanna touch it with a gentle hand
    And the moment that you get it up for me
    I wanna feel it in my hand again
    And it comes to me you don't know me
    But that won't keep me from living my fantasy
    And it´s me you need to show

    How big is your schlong?

    How big is your schlong? How big is your schlong?
    I really need to know. 'Cause I'm living in a world of tools
    Sad not profound , they aint got s**t for me to see,
    They make me laugh until I pee, lalalalalalalalalalala.


    Pitiful isn't it?
     
  4. naughty

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    Heh,

    Pretty good riff, Hapi! ;)


    Naughty
     
  5. Imported

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    Hapi Papi: I know you got an enormous one
    I wanna touch it with a gentle hand
    And the moment that you get it up for me
    I wanna feel it in my hand again
    And it comes to me you don't know me
    But that won't keep me from living my fantasy
    And it´s me you need to show

    How big is your schlong?

    How big is your schlong? How big is your schlong?
    I really need to know. 'Cause I'm living in a world of tools
    Sad not profound , they aint got s**t for me to see,
    They make me laugh until I pee

    I believe it's true
    You know my friends wanna get with you
    You´re the sight of my deepest desire
    You´re my favorite one of all
    And you're right I don't really care for you
    When you know all I want is to measure you
    But it´s me you need to show

    How big is your schlong?

    How big is your schlong? How big is your schlong?
    I really need to know. 'Cause I'm living in a world of tools
    Sad not profound, they're all just too small for me,
    They make me laugh uncontrollably

    Na na na na na na na na na...

    And it comes to me you don't know me
    But that won't keep me from living my fantasy
    And it´s me you need to show

    How big is your schlong?

    How big is your schlong? How big is your schlong?
    I really need to know. 'Cause I'm living in a world of tools
    Sad not profound , they aint got s**t for me to see,
    They make me laugh until I pee

    Na na na na na na...



    More pitiful than before.
     
  6. naughty

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    That's great, Hapi.

    We just need to merge the main portion of your song with my ever changing choruses . I think we have something here! LOL!

    naughty
     
  7. Imported

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    Hapi Papi: You can sing it... Let's record!

    And who cares if I rhymed "you" with "you"?!
     
  8. naughty

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    Hapi,

    for one of your verses I came up with an alternative.. where you say " Sad not profound , they're all just to small for me to see they make me laugh uncontrollably" you might say "they're all just too small to see, I'm laughing uncontrollably! or add " bringing me down, while they're no bigger than a flea, I could acommodate a tree! " or " get out of town, what you are forcing me to see it really does nothing for me" or finally "that make me frown ,they just are not my cup of tea what they've got fills me with ennui! " LOL!


    Naughty
     
  9. Imported

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    Hapi Papi: Good ones! It's tough for me to come up with rhymes. Let's do them all! Alternate version one, alternate version 2, remix 1, extended versions...
     
  10. naughty

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    Heh !
    How about "Listen you clown, before you to put that thing in me, I must demand you try P.E.!" or " No going down town, until you promise faithfully you wont require the same of me" or finally" I've been around, and I assure you mini me, true love for us just can not be!" LOL!

    Naughty
     
  11. Imported

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    BRMSTN69: well I'm a classic rock fan so I was thinking Billy Squire "The Stroke"
     
  12. naughty

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    Ok ,

    Here is a morph of Hapi's and my librettos! LOL!

    How deep is your love ( or How big is your schlong " the size queen's lament")


    I know you've got an enourmous one
    I want to touch it with my hand
    The moment that you get it up for me
    I want to feel it once again
    Oh, you have come to see, you really dont know me
    But that won't keep me from living my fantasy
    and its me you need to show

    How big is your schlong?

    How big is your schlong? how big is your schlong?
    yours really makes me yearn, 'Cause I'm livin' in a world of tools
    not to be found it takes a microscope to see
    what they can't give away for free

    na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

    I believe it's true, you know my girls all want to get wit you!
    you're the object of my deep desire
    You're my favorite one of all
    You're right I dont really care for you
    If you don't measure up, honey we're through
    So its me you need to show

    How big is your schlong?

    How big is your schlong? how big is your schlong?
    In hell I'm gonna burn, but i'm livin' in a world of tools
    bringing me down, most are no bigger than a flea
    I could accomodate a tree

    na na na na na na na na na na na na na

    Here are additional choruses:

    How big is your schlong? how big is your schlong?
    my stomach please don't turn
    cause i'm livin' in a world of tools
    listen you clown before you bring that thing near me
    May I suggest you try P.E.?

    Na na na na na na na na na na na na na

    How big is your schlong?, How big is your schlong?
    my insides your gonna burn
    but i'm livin' in world of tools
    that make me frown they're just not my cup of tea
    theirs just fill me with ennui!

    na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

    How big is your schlong? how big is your schlong?
    your love I've got to earn
    cause I'm living in a world of tools
    small not profound they aint got s..t for me to see
    I'm always laughing uncontrollably

    na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

    How big is your schlong? how big is your schlong?
    I' ll just wait for my turn
    cause I'm livin' in a world of tools
    And I've been around
    I can assure you mini me true love for us just can not be!

    na na na na na na na na na na na na na



    How big is your schlong? how big is your schong?
    You could be my sweetie
    I love livin in this world of tools
    no going down town
    until your promise faithfully you wont require the same from me!

    na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na

    How big is your schlong? How big is your schlong?
    I really cant discern! photoshopping is against the rules
    with knowing eyes you know the seams we all can see
    not genuine LPSG!

    Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na


    Enjoy!
     
  13. jdoe86

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    GREAT... Now I will have the song stuck in my head all day :lol: .
     
  14. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    I have never been able to understand the words to most songs on the radio. All of my friends will hear a song once or twice and sing along. The only way I've ever been able to do that is to find the lyrics written down somewhere. Otherwise I'm forever getting the words wrong.

    For instance, today I heard a new one, LPSG's New Theme Song, I think. Nice rhythm, great tune.

    But I could swear it sounded like the chorus said, "How big is your schlong?"

    :blink:

    I need to see those lyrics before I attempt to sing along with this one!
     
  15. madame_zora

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    Oh man, you guys are creative geniuses!! Naughty, I saw this at 5 in the morning, and I almost laughed until I fell outta my chair! This is an absolute riot, much needed levity, indeed. I am too braindead to cotribute anything of worth, but you and Papi seem to be doing just great.

    I was always amazed that no one in the str8 world picked up on the Stroke being a gay themed song!!
     
  16. B_DoubleMeatWhopper

    B_DoubleMeatWhopper New Member

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    Aw, c'mon, Geo; there are a lot of things worse than having a Bee Gees song stuck in your head. Uh, okay, maybe not a lot of things, now that I think about it, but it beats the hell out of, say, Kung Fu Fighting!
     
  17. Imported

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    Hapi Papi:
    Aw, c'mon, Geo; there are a lot of things worse than having a Bee Gees song stuck in your head. Uh, okay, maybe not a lot of things, now that I think about it, but it beats the hell out of, say, Kung Fu Fighting! [/b][/quote]
    Ok this is NOT going to make sense... but I just wanted something to stay in your head Dr. Whopper!

    Oh-oh-oh-oh...
    ohhhhhhhh....

    Everybody was hung so mighty
    those guys were oh so sightly

    In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
    but they swung with rhythmic timing

    There were swinging black men from swinging Harlem town
    They were flapping them up, they were flapping them down
    It's an ancient stereotype,
    That everybody knew was right
    For my friend, ain't you stiff, when I'm packin' from the hip

    Everybody was hung so mighty
    those guys were oh so sightly

    In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
    but they swung with rhythmic timing

    There was "cocky" Billie Jim and "little" Sammy John
    He said, here comes the big boss, let's get it on
    We took them out and made them stand,
    Started swaying with the hand
    A sudden motion made me stiff, now we're into a brand new trip

    Everybody was hung so mighty
    those guys were oh so sightly

    In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
    but they swung with rhythmic timing

    Oh-oh-oh-oh...Everybody was hung so mighty
    those guys were oh so sightly

    In fact it was a little bit fright'ning
    My God they are hugely packing
    Hung so mighty, had to be from LPSG...
     
  18. naughty

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    Workin' up a good pot of mad!
    Yo Hapi!
    Baby, you have discovered your calling ! A song writer! LOL! Our own resident songmeister! Or we have created a monster! LOL! I guess we are just the LPSG's very own Ashford and Simpson.

    Their song "Solid as a Rock" is soooo very appropos! Here we go!


    And for love's sake , each time I fake, you forgive
    rub my clitoris til you learn to thrust
    I dont have time to play, with your lame shit today!
    (Please learn to f..., please learn to f.... please learn to f....)


    Cause boy you're solid
    Solid as a rock
    Thats what this c... is
    that's what you've got ! ( oh yeah)

    Solid ( oh)
    Solid as a rock
    Dont make me come yet
    your stuff is so hot, hot ,hot ,hot ,hot ,hot ,hot!

    (oh,oh,oh,oh,oh,oh,)

    I told you I was gay
    hoping you would go away
    Some how you managed
    to get us stuck together

    You did'nt bat an eye
    at my outrageous lie
    we knew down the line
    my hand would make it bigger
    (ooh.ooh.ooh)

    ( you learned to f... you learned to f... you learned to f...!)

    Gone with the wind
    Another friend
    who's cootchie got in between ( ooh,ooh)
    Tried to separate us ( ooh,ooh)

    Oh your morning wood
    boy, how it just stood
    before you blew
    I did what I
    had to do ( ooh,ooh)

    And with that feeling
    I was willing to take
    a chance
    so with that big rod
    you made a prod
    you got serious
    this morning
    you were all lust

    ( boy, you can f..., boy, you can f..., boy, you can f...)

    Because your solid
    solid as a rock
    thats what your c... is
    it makes me so hot ( not!)

    solid
    solid as a rock
    youve got the stuff, boy
    I've hit the jackpot! ( not,not,not,not,not,not!)


    Solid ( ooh)
    Solid as a rock! ( you know it well you know it, baby!)
    Solid
    solid as a rock ( lovin' me , lovin' me, ooh!)
    solid ( don't tease me baby! )
    Solid (well! )
    Solid as a rock ( good, good, well its so good! )
    solid ( solid, solid.solid, solid,solid, solid)
    solid as a rock!


    Enjoy!

    Naughty
     
  19. Imported

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    Hapi Papi: Haha Naughty... pretty soon we'll have a full LPSG album!

    Naw, I couldn't really be a songwriter.. you have no idea how long it took me to come up with this stuff. Rhyming is very hard for me. I'm glad the last song had most of the words already there.. just need to switch the context. Maybe if I work at it, Weird Al should watch out!
     
  20. Imported

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    BRMSTN69: gee.. thanks hapi, as I was just reading yourr re-mix of Kung-Fu Figgting that stupid Geiko ad came on tv, and now I can't get the image of the Geico geko singing your lyrics outta my head :wacko:
     
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