Lying About No. of Sexual Partners?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_ScaredLittleBoy, Aug 19, 2007.

  1. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    How widespread would you say this phenomenon is? I think most people lie. Here is what I think:

    Girls - say less than the real total, not wanting to sound like a slut
    Men - say MORE than the real total, to appear like a stud?

    Discuss :smile:

    I myself am ever truthful.

    PS I don't think a girl with a lot of partners is a slut. I commend them for being hot enough to get so much sex :biggrin1:
     
  2. SpoiledPrincess

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    I'm truthful in so far as I'll tell someone I have no intention of telling them the real figure :) What's in the past is in the past, the number of sexual partners I have doesn't have any relevance on my life now, I never did anything I was ashamed of and I don't think it serves any purpose telling a guy how many guys I've fucked.
     
  3. viking1

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    People will lie about anything to gain self gratification at the moment.
    Whether it be number of sex partners, penis size, or gas mileage...
     
  4. 50%more

    50%more New Member

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    It depends on who I am talking to. I certainly would not maximize my promiscuity when talking to my Mom. :wink: I am more likely to minimize the number of experiences especially if I am trying to get laid. :biggrin1:

    I don't like to brag to other guys, since I don't like it when guys brag about those things. I don't see sexual conquests on their own, as a measure of a persons character whether male or female. I do not respect people who are so fixated on having sex that they sacrifice other positive social attributes. When I was younger I think a lot of my male friends did exaggerate, but I don't run across many people at my age who do this anymore.

    But generally, I think you are correct. I am pretty certain that my current gf has had many more partners than I. I have always been on the quiet side, quiet but not shy. She is very outgoing and flirtatious. This does not bother me, although she does seem to minimize her experience whenever the subject comes up, as rare as that might be.
     
  5. rob_just_rob

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    I heard an anecdote to the effect that when a man tells you how many partners he has had, you divide that number by 3 to get to the real total. But when a woman says how many partners she has had, you multiply the number by 3 to get her total.

    One of the many great legacies of the Clinton administration was the concept of redefining when sex has occurred. By redefining when I have had sex with someone, I can increase or decrease my own total by almost 50%/35%. That could come in handy. :smile:
     
  6. lafever

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    What does it have to do with the price of tea in china, i agree with spoiled-princess, the past is exactly what it means.


    lafever
     
  7. ZOS23xy

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    I kind of recall everyone I've had sex with, but often I don't really have a number. I tried for years to keep in touch and remain friends, but people do move on, away and break off. My wife is the same, and I think her numbers were about a dozen or so on me.

    Our brag? Twenty+ years with each other.
     
  8. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    I've never lied... most of my immediate friends know already.
     
  9. DreamofJeannie

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    I do not really talk about it with anyone, nor do I ask.
     
  10. jack99821

    jack99821 Member

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    I'm not too sure that women would want to *reduce* the number of partners. If you're going to lie about it, it's usually human nature to brag rather than to sell yourself short, with some exceptions.

    I have to admit, though, that I have lied about it a couple times before (a reduction). It's not always smart to admit to being stupidly promiscuous, especially when someone I respect is asking.
     
  11. Principessa

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  12. wldhoney

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    I don't know about men, but when I was younger my girlfriends used to lie and increase their count, then as they got older they would lie and decrease it. However, I've noticed that most women seem to reach a certain age where they mature and have greater self-confidence and don't feel the need to apologize for the amount of sexual partners they have had, when few or many.

    Having been married or in LTR's, I haven't had that many....under ten.
     
  13. frizzle

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    I can count the number of girls I've slept with one hand.
     
  14. WildHoney

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    Like I even want to go there:tongue: ...or count myself:confused: Does fucking other women count even:cool: :redface:


    However, I had only slept with 6 guys before marriage. Then it just all went to shit:biggrin1: * all sexual activity happens with my hubby, I am not just screwing around*

    x

    Honey
     
  15. D_smack ash

    D_smack ash Account Disabled

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    lets see one,two ,three hmmm thats it
     
  16. DragonsRanger

    DragonsRanger New Member

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    Why do ppls lie?? about anything?? it's "fear". The real Q is, why does the number actually matter? Men inflate to add the image of "experience" like "yeah baby I know how to give ya what ya want"... not realizing they are not fillin out a job application. Women on the otherhand are walking a 2 edged sword, If they say a lot, they are condemed to sluthood, and if not enough they are frigid virgins, ... Hence why it's always a lie on the tip of anyones tongue when asked. It's the "fear" of how we percieve the truth will accepted that actually dictates the number when asked. Myself I was a "virgin" until I was 25... women always wanted to be my first..(grins)
     
  17. Scorpiorising

    Scorpiorising New Member

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    I agree with you whole heartedly. I have always been silent about number of relationships, with whom, and sexual experience. Generally, silence has never caused a problem, but relationships failed anyway due to my silence on other subjects (such as what irritated me, etc.).

    Well, my last relationship taught me that total honesty can be a flop, as well. I decided that maybe I should try being completely open about my past experience and current irritations (though quite rationally). Gay men suffer along with women in reputation. We're not studs if we get a lot, we're sluts as well. Turns out, regardless of reform and total loyalty (That I've always been), I was regarded as a total slut who slept with everyone on the East coast by my boyfriend. He couldn't get past the fact that I had a few sex partners more in my 38 years compared to his 28, and yes, a fuck buddy here and there. I thought the openness would be appreciated, but it soon made me wonder, was my past really as relevent to our relationship as he is making it out to be? I AM loyal, for all heck's sake! And, I've always been safe; he knew that, too.

    I don't know what approach to take anymore. The past is NOT relevent. It's just there. It destroys because people put a stigma on it. I'm leaning towards a modifying approach in future relationships. You think that's wrong?
     
  18. whatireallywant

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  19. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    true, according to American Pie II.

    Not true according to my own experience.

    I have nothing personally against promiscuity but I think that it's possible for guys to be perceived as slutty, too. Even if maybe they have more leeway than girls. Of course misrepresenting how many partners you've had has everything to do with other people's perception of you and nothing to do with any real qualitative difference between the quantitative difference.
     
  20. B_IanTheTall

    B_IanTheTall New Member

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    I'd say that ScaredLittleBoy is looking at this from a very heterocentric position, I've noticed that what he prescribed as the "girl" role could be considered the receptive/submissive position, while the "man" role is the insertive/dominant role. Since gay males that bottom for many guys are also called sluts by others and promiscuous tops are called studs.

    I admit that I don't know how many people I've had sex with, of either gender, you know how those bi-permisive Berlin sex clubs are...
    I know that I've done way more ten people, but way way less than a thousand.
     
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