Marleyisalegend's eleventh hour reprieve!!!!

marleyisalegend

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I busted out!

There has been much speculation as to my whereabouts. There were "Where is Marley" segments on CNN, Enertainment Tonight, even a front page feature in the New York Times.

Well I've come to squash the rumors, yes I was in prison, but it was all a misunderstanding. I was working as a waiter at Red Lobster when, as they do every Wednesday, a few mafia heads came in to enjoy our aqueous cuisine.

Long story short, one thing leads to another and I'm behind the dumpster out back blowing them one by one (jerking them two by two as God blessed me with two hands). The police show up and everybody bolts. In the process, I, being on my knees, was knocked into the mud, ruining my $30 knock-off Manolo Blahniks. :mad:

Somehow, the police mistook me for a fourty year old Italian mobster and they Rodney Kinged me right on the spot and hauled me off to the chokey.

Fortunately I carried a torrid but gratifying affair with the judge a few years back so he approved my early release. I didn't have to blow the warden on my way out....but I did anway. :biggrin1:

Anyway, howdy everyone!
 

marleyisalegend

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What did I tell you about them back alley blowjobs?

To always cup the balls, which I did! Didn't keep me outta the slammer.

Welcome back, dude! :biggrin:

Fuck the salutations, how about we meet in the utility closet and you give me some welcome back dick?
 

vince

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Heyyy... welcum back. Sounds like the man was't able to crush your élan vital! (or other vitals)

pssst... Some peeps were talking shit about you behind your back. Don't worry... we fucked them.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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Waitaminute, do I understand you right?

You went into an alley, blew two guys,

The cops showed, and as you've put so eloquently, "Rodney Kinged you", mistook you for a 40 yr old italian mobster,
Got hauled off to the slam/pokey/cooler,
ruined your cheap knock off shoes,

Got off 'cause you & the judge got each other off some time ago,

Then blew the warden for emphasis?


I'll tell you this much- your wednesdays at least this one sure have mine beat.
 

marleyisalegend

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Ah, at long last you're back! I drove through your town twice last weekend. It's still there.

Unfortunately I've changed towns. I moved down to Columbia, South Carolina, been here about a month.

Remember that news story about the woman in Mcdonald's calling the police over some Mcnuggets? Yup, that's the county I'm living in now.