? What would prompt a person with an "addictive personality" to choose drugs in the first place? You don't just wake up one day and say I need
to use a drug. Once exposed, your argument may be true. In fact, until exposed, you can live an entire life without feeling the need to do a drug.
Umm... kinda the point I was making... You don't know if you are going to become addicted until you CHOOSE to indulge... at which point it may be too late.
Ergo, why would you make a conscious decision to experiment sexually when you don't know it if will make your current loving relationship unfullfilling?
How can you know what has or has not been for another person. Perhaps that is true for you. Only I know when the first urge and attraction occurred for me. And it may be that I didn't recognize it as such when it actually happened.
You miss the point... I don't care when you felt the urge... there is a difference between FEELING that urge and INDULGING that urge.
Sounds like you believe same sex attraction is a choice. I'm just wondering what you would say to your child who needs guidance as he or she is feeling the presence of "that which can be ignored".
That is not what I said at all... I said what you CHOOSE TO DO is a choice.
Sorry... but its a fact.
If I had a son who seemed to have attraction to males I would discuss it with him and make him understand that he has the option of exploring those feeling without fear of my disapproval.
However... that is not the situation you presented.
You are MARRIED.... with CHILDREN....
You have already MADE those choices and now your actions are not entirely your own... they affect the lives of others. ( not only emotionally, but financially )
You have a responsibility to the choices you have made, to the promises you have made.
If you think you are gay then you must get out of the relationship that you entered into falsely.
If you are Bi... then you have to CHOOSE... to either try and explore that bisexual side, at the peril of your marriage... or to remain faithful to your wife and family.
I am not judging that choice... I am merely explaining the potential consequences.
If you explore gay sex, you will find it exciting and novel and stimulating... but not necessarily because you are gay... it could well only be
because it is novel.
You would have the same reaction to getting into S&M with your wife ( if that interested you) Getting into extreme sexuality with your wife would have the same effect of making normal sex seem duller by comparison.
You could easily become unable to orgasm without the more intense stimulation of S&M...
By the same token, even a passing fascination with male on male sex, if indulged, will make sex with your wife seem dull by comparision... and could result in you no longer being able to be satisfied by her.
It could well be a mistake to assume that its because you are more gay than straight... because the novelty factor, the forbidden factor, is largely what will frame your initial response.
These are the facts of how humans react to new stimulation.
Especially in men who are over a certain age... they tend to seek more intense stimulation to maintain the sexual performance that came naturally when they were 20.
Take it for what its worth.
I am merely giving you the benefit of long observation and many years lived.