Masturbating with food!!!!

[October68]

I was so horny today I cut open an eggplant lubed it up with saliva and hand lotion and went to town!!! It felt tight I also heated it up in the microwave a bit!!! It felt like a nice warm hole!!! It was noisy though and somewhat messy. Had to shower afterwards!!! I masturbated with a banana squash before too. Of course they are raw and I throw them away afterwards.

 

[tamuning]

Jeez you guys, just call 1-800-GETLAID!

 

[CommandoInTheBuff]

Well I dont like cumming on my food cause I want to eat it later. But after a shower when I know I'm clean and I'm preparing food naked, I'll put my dick in it, I especially like putting it into sandwiches.

 

[youngdumbfullofcum]

:lmao:Exactly

Jeez you guys, just call 1-800-GETLAID!

 

[Pitbull]

Some ideas for you when you don't have an eggplant:

http://www.lpsg.org/77779-ever-fucked-a-melon-watermelon.html#post1290111

http://www.lpsg.org/77779-ever-fucked-a-melon-watermelon.html#post2205381

(Thanks to Meniscus)

 

[CommandoInTheBuff]

This is going to sound nasty to some. I masturbated with a raw egg. I was around 14yrs old and i snuck into the kitchen, easily opened the door to the fridge[totally naked, and hoping not to get caught], cracked the egg and used what i could hold in my hand, lubed my dick and put the shells in the garbage,quick clean up. Trying to stay hard. Got back to my room, finished, I had the best orgasm, ll over me. So i licked off egg flavored cum. Till this day, from time to time, I still do it. Love it.

Doesn't sound nasty, I've actually wanted to try that.

 

[TurkeyWithaSunburn]

Fun thread of sploshing
uttahere:

 

[luka82]

Pics or it never happened!!!!:biggrin1:

 

[GogMegog]

Ohh, How intelligent idea!!

 

[Ren69]

I did it with mango slides, feels like a tongue.

 

[ottosafado]

only olive oil ...

when he was boyfriend has happened we use condesado milk and ice cream ....

 

[LaFemme]

The ER is full of sexual mishaps involving food sex gone wrong!

 

[Mercurygirl]

Note to self: Avoid lunch date with the following men ...

 

[cadehung]

I once fucked a chicken pot pie right out of the oven...big mistake!

 

[latinabella]

I was so horny today I cut open an eggplant lubed it up with saliva and hand lotion and went to town!!! It felt tight I also heated it up in the microwave a bit!!! It felt like a nice warm hole!!! It was noisy though and somewhat messy. Had to shower afterwards!!! I masturbated with a banana squash before too. Of course they are raw and I throw them away afterwards.

I know all about Food-Porn, but that has nothing to do with actually getting penetrated or penetrate the food physically. LOL.

 

[latinabella]

Note to self: Avoid lunch date with the following men ...

...or avoid a date that mean cooking dinner together with them. You never know what ingredients whey have done it with...lol

 

[Silvertip]

...or avoid a date that mean cooking dinner together with them. You never know what ingredients whey have done it with...lol

Yes, whey is an ingredient.

 

[Silvertip]

Well I dont like cumming on my food cause I want to eat it later ...

So what's the problem with eating it after you've cum on it?

 

[622675]

Any guy from the South knows that the juice from a few microwaved pods of okra makes great lube. Same thing for ripe avocado, but use it directly from the fruit with no microwaving. Steer clear of avocado dip since it usually contains lemon and jalapeno juice.

Also, it is hard to beat a sun-warmed watermelon when shared with a friend. It is a great way to get acquainted.

Cooking is not my thing, however, for those who are into it check out Cooking with cum - Natural Harvest & Semenology | Natural Harvest - A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes & Semenology - The Semen Bartender's Handbook

 

[latinabella]

Yes, whey is an ingredient.

Misspelled, it should be THEY if you couldnt figure it our yourself :wink: