Masturbation Guilt

Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by steve319, Apr 17, 2005.

  1. steve319

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    First of all, indulge me long enough to let me set the mood with a song, OK?

    Drive By (Glen Phillips)

    I was the driver for the drive-by of the neighbor's dog
    Dad had always hated him and he said "Come on son,
    "Get into the Vega now and I'll go get my shotgun"
    It was a military holiday and kids were everywhere
    I hid behind the steering wheel and tried to disappear
    I tried to speak but couldn't, Dad was whistling and drinking beer

    And I prayed "Dear God, if You save this dog
    "I will never get high, I will never jack off
    "I will do all the things that I should but have not
    "I'll be a good boy from now on"

    We turned around the corner soon and saw the neighbor's yard
    Dad lit up a cigarette and rolled his window down
    And grinning like an idiot he stuck his head and body out

    And I prayed "Dear God, if You save this dog
    "I will never get high, I will never jack off
    "I will be all the things that I should but have not
    "I'll be a good boy from now on"

    Well he popped in a shell and took aim with the gun
    Then a flash and a bang and the dog it was gone. . .
    Jumped up and he ran away
    Dad had shot right through his chain

    Dad said "Take me to the Dairy Freeze, I want to have a shake"
    We sipped them on the benches there and stared out on the lake
    And Dad has never said another word about that day

    And I hope you're not disappointed, God
    'Cause I still get high and I still jack off
    And you knew I was lying but you still saved that dog
    You're such a good God
    Such a good, good God…
    And I'll be a good boy from now on


    Pretty evocative of that period of life, huh? Beyond the fun god/dog wordplay at the end, it conjures (for me, anyway) that feeling of still being under the influence of our parents and other authorities yet on the edge of something new.

    Now that we’ve activated prior knowledge ;), let’s move on to the question at hand: Were you taught to feel guilty about masturbation?

    Because of parents, teachers, friends, church, whomever—did you carry a burden of guilt over it? And, since we all did it anyway, how did you finally justify it for yourself and move past that guilt (particularly if it was a religious issue for you)?

    (Oh, and if you’re going to tell me you didn’t/don’t masturbate, how do you rationalize choosing to lie like that? B))
     
  2. Freddie53

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    No. I was never taught to feel guilty about it. If a guy is not sexually active with anther person, masturbation is actually physically good for him. The prostate needs to be emptied of semen on a regular basis.

    In my church sexuality classes, I teach that masturbation should be a private thing and not something to do openly. I taught my own sons the same thing.

    I don't really know how bad having a circle jerk really is, but I am smart enough not to tell boys in church to do that and have that spread around town. But, I wouldn't have chatised them for it if they had told me about it. But as an adult I defintely will not participate in such an public activity.

    And I really caught flak from one teenager visiting our church from a very
    "fundie" church. He was really taught that masturbation is some sort of major sin.

    I doubt that seriously. It is good for the body especially younger males. And just who is it hurting? Absolutely no one.

    And masturbation might prevent a disease or an unwanted pregnancy by keeping a guy from just having sex with someone because they are horny and horny enough to not think about protection and consequences.


    quote=steve319,Apr 16 2005, 11:48 PM]
    First of all, indulge me long enough to let me set the mood with a song, OK?

    Drive By (Glen Phillips)

    I was the driver for the drive-by of the neighbor's dog
    Dad had always hated him and he said "Come on son,
    "Get into the Vega now and I'll go get my shotgun"
    It was a military holiday and kids were everywhere
    I hid behind the steering wheel and tried to disappear
    I tried to speak but couldn't, Dad was whistling and drinking beer

    And I prayed "Dear God, if You save this dog
    "I will never get high, I will never jack off
    "I will do all the things that I should but have not
    "I'll be a good boy from now on"

    We turned around the corner soon and saw the neighbor's yard
    Dad lit up a cigarette and rolled his window down
    And grinning like an idiot he stuck his head and body out

    And I prayed "Dear God, if You save this dog
    "I will never get high, I will never jack off
    "I will be all the things that I should but have not
    "I'll be a good boy from now on"

    Well he popped in a shell and took aim with the gun
    Then a flash and a bang and the dog it was gone. . .
    Jumped up and he ran away
    Dad had shot right through his chain

    Dad said "Take me to the Dairy Freeze, I want to have a shake"
    We sipped them on the benches there and stared out on the lake
    And Dad has never said another word about that day

    And I hope you're not disappointed, God
    'Cause I still get high and I still jack off
    And you knew I was lying but you still saved that dog
    You're such a good God
    Such a good, good God…
    And I'll be a good boy from now on


    Pretty evocative of that period of life, huh? Beyond the fun god/dog wordplay at the end, it conjures (for me, anyway) that feeling of still being under the influence of our parents and society yet on the edge of something new.

    Now that we’ve activated prior knowledge ;), let’s move on to the question at hand: Were you taught to feel guilty about masturbation?

    Because of parents, teachers, friends, church, whomever—did you carry a burden of guilt over it? And, since we all did it anyway, how did you finally justify it for yourself and move past that guilt (particularly if it was a religious issue for you)?

    (Oh, and if you’re going to tell me you didn’t/don’t masturbate, how do you rationalize choosing to lie like that? B))
    [post=301286]Quoted post[/post]​
    [/quote]
     
  3. KinkGuy

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    My father very openly and frankly discussed masturbation (and most sexual matters) with us boys in a very natural, warm and accepting manner. He explained that all boys/men masturbate; that it was normal, healthy and to be enjoyed. He explained all the physical aspects as well as the emotional sides of sex in general. He walked in one afternoon while my younger brother and I were involved in a little "brotherly love", turned and left the room. Later he discussed what had occurred and explained that it was not unnatural or wrong for boys to explore sexually together and made sure we didn't feel ashamed by our actions. Dad was an unusual character, very open, honest and secure ...and produced three wildly different and original sons.
     
  4. Dr. Dilznick

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    No, but I never got "the talk" either. The subject of sex was never discussed in our home, or at least not when I was around. I think it was mostly because of my father. My mother knew what I was doing in my bedroom every night. I was around 15 years old, I think, when she "accidentally" walked in on me while I was beating my meat. My heart almost stopped. She just smiled and said, "One day you will make some lady very happy."

    I still don't know what she meant by that. I never asked either.
     
  5. KinkGuy

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    Oh, I think you very well know what she meant. :D
     
  6. Dr. Dilznick

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    That couldn't have been the reason why she said that. I went through puberty later than most. ;)
     
  7. surferboy

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    I never felt guilty about jerking off. My parents raised me to know that it's way natural and all, and that I shoud never feel guilty about any sexual activity, be it with myself or others.
     
  8. KinkGuy

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    surferboy,
    I think your parents did a pretty damn good job raising a smart, well adjusted guy.
     
  9. surferboy

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    Thank you! :D
     
  10. Pappy

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    And a dam cute one too :wub: :wub:
     
  11. madame_zora

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    Whee! Pappy's back! Kink, Nixxy, let the man love begin!


    I was taught that masturbation was wrong by inference. It really wasn't discussed around our house, just the general tone of sex being for marriage only. I didn't really masturbate to orgasm until I was in my 20's. I think this is a very different subject for women though.
     
  12. lokican

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    I don't think it ever came up with my parents but i'm sure they dont see it as wrong or anything

    BTW does it say so in the bible that it is a sin?
     
  13. D_Stavelay Strappon

    D_Stavelay Strappon New Member

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    I did some for sure, until my mom caught me jackin when about 12. She was so cool about it, bless her ! btw, my dad has never talked sex with me. interesting ?
     
  14. B_HungSpermBoy

    B_HungSpermBoy New Member

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    My dad used to joke with me about masturbation all the time but it was in this weird funny way. Let's just say that my dad is a weird funny guy BTW. He would say stuff like, "Jeff, don't do anything that will scare the dog or your mother". And he always said stuff like that with a funny little wink, like we had this sexual secret between us. I always laughed. He was cool about discussing jerking off with me. One time he said that I should stop doing it when my cock started to hurt & give it a rest! I never take his advice though. :D
     
  15. Dr Rock

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    who lives in the east 'neath the willow tree? Sex
    nope. nobody ever told me jerking off was wrong, and I wouldn't have cared if they had - after all, I was constantly told by many, many sources during my early teens that smoking, drinking, having sex and taking drugs were all wrong, and it sure as hell never stopped me. my mother never spoke to me about sex or sexuality in any respect that I can remember, but she knew I was doing it long before I left home.
     
  16. Dude!

    Dude! New Member

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    No, it doesn't (explicitly)

    Some people use the story of Onan 'spilling his seed on the ground' to say it's wrong but I think it's actually that he refused to give the wife of his desceased brother a child, or something like that.

    Bible does say lustful thoughts are a sin though. There are just so many of them though!
     
  17. Dr Rock

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    who lives in the east 'neath the willow tree? Sex
    oh yeah. because, I mean, that would have been SO much more acceptable than just jerking off. :eyes:
     
  18. D_Martin van Burden

    D_Martin van Burden Account Disabled

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    Heh. My mom caught me doing it in my teens and she told me to stop, but I think it was because when I would do it before I would spooge in my boxers and those stains are like hell to get 'em out.
     
  19. txquis

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    Nobody taught me it was wrong.
    I had parents that were very loving and open about such things.

    Funny enough, the more open they were about things, the more i dreaded
    them talking about it.

    I felt a bit guilty about it when i was 12...just on my own.
    I got over that quickly though.
     
  20. willie

    willie New Member

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    When I was young, it just seemed to be a thing that was just accepted as something that boys do. Often.
    You were just expected to not make it obvious and accept the occasional joke.

    I've always been surprised by quite experienced girls, that had never seen a man masturbate and were very enthusiastic to watch. It's odd how people prioritise taboos differently.
     
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