Materialism fueling depression

[B_Hickboy]

Tools are one of the most important things, if one know how to use them. I'm between contracts right now, but have broken the piggy bank to buy a new computer so I'll have a backup on hand to work at.

 

[Redwyvre]

I think depression is anger turned inward. If buying stuff makes a person depressed perhaps he/she should become more willing to stop doing it. Does this make any sense to anyone else?

 

[deleted3782]

As I quickly scanned this thread, two point came to my mind...the first related to what Vince said:

The only material things that have importance for me are a few heirlooms, my hand tools and an art collection.

And this is largely true for me. The material items that I most value are related to (a) history or (b) place... such as (a) a rocking chair owned by my great great great grandfather, a chest built by my great grandfather, a portrait of my great grandmother, etc, or (b) a poster from Tuscany, a brass candlestick from Transylvania, a Lucky Cat from China. They are little things that were fairly cheap but remind me of where I came from and where I have been. I don't own an i-anything, I have a 32" flat screen because my old tv died, and I have a modest house that is a family hand-me-down. Most of my dispensable income goes to travel.

The second thought that came to mind related to this discussion grew from a conversation my mom and I had a few days ago. The local television station was advocating for a toy drive to gather items for low-income kids. A penned area was created in a local Superstore that they encouraged people to drop items in to such as bikes, dolls, and such...however, they strongly encouraged people to just leave cash so that they could buy items that low-income kids had requested on their "Wish List".

So...what is the message that these kids are getting in this process? On Christmas morning a kid gets a bike from a toy drive. Why? Well...because they are low-income. Be poor, get a bike! Did Santa bring it? No. A parent or grandparent? No. Did someone give it to you who knows you and has an interest in you? No. Just a some group of people gave you the bike because its Christmas and you are poor. Am I the only one who thinks that is a horrible message? Does the kid understand the concept of charity...or do they develop a sense of entitlement or low self esteem?

And as for the "Wish List"... if strangers are going to give you free crap because you are poor...then I would think you would accept what they gave you and not present them with a list of items that you want. You accept what you are given, thank them profusely, and be grateful.

Maybe we (Americas) are so caught up in the legend of Santa Clause that we cannot live with ourselves in imagining a kid on Christmas morning with few presents as proof that Santa doesn't love them or has forgotten them. Or...maybe Walmart just wants consumers to think of that scenario as they roll their shopping carts down the toy aisle.

Are we reinforcing the connection between love and self-worth, and dare I say feelings of entitlement to the next generation through Christmas materialism and charity?

 

[B_jeepguy2]

120-150 ft yachts. They have no useful purpose or redeeming qualities other than the jobs that are created. But the owners could use their money to build something more useful and still create employment.

You got a link to the ones you build? I have been on a few of them before as well as some amaller yachts and they are truely amazing. I used to seen Jimmy Dean's 110 footer "Big Bad John" on the water all the time back in the 1990s. Neat to look at but I would not own one even if I were a billionaire.

If I were insanely wealthy I would get an old Tommy Rybovich boat from the 1960s and spend a million bucks restoring it because I think they are works of art. I don't really care for the cookie cutter fiberglass boats. They all look alike to me.

 

[D_Bob_Crotchitch]

I'd really just like a nice warm blanket, some more fleece socks, and a pair of new jeans. All of those items I can find at reasonable prices, and made in USA.

 

[B_Hickboy]

I think depression is anger turned inward. If buying stuff makes a person depressed perhaps he/she should become more willing to stop doing it. Does this make any sense to anyone else?

Well, yeah, it does. But Consumerism is a cunning, baffling, and powerful disease.

 

[D_Bob_Crotchitch]

Turn off your tv. Studies have shown that the more tv you watch, the more material goods you think you need to be happy. I don't own a lot of furniture but think I own too much. I want to be free to play with hick's tits, take her outside, and have wild monkey sex in the back yard.

 

[SilverTrain]

I feel the need for material things is a by-product of Depression.

You buy stuff to make you happy....but it only works for a little while.
So then you buy more, for that instant gratification of something new....but then it wears off, and the process repeats.

I see.

Tools are never a bad purchase. You can never go wrong with tools.

Don't be afraid to check out the swap meets and estate/garage sales for cheaper options.... Most of my "Specialty" tools I have are expensive when buying retail, but a fraction of the cost at trade shows.

They have already paid for themselves on savings from auto repairs and odd job auto repairs I have done for others.

Something you can use and re-use long term I don't feel is a bad purchase as long as it gets used often. It's the other things we buy that put us in the hole:

Porn..
sex toys...
that brand new Ipad, when your older laptop works fine but just needs a tune up...
Garden Gnomes at Wal-mart
Big Box Mart shit.

Speaking of which...
JibJab - Big Box Mart - YouTube

Ah, the exceptions. Are these listed in Emily Post? Are they hanging on the wall at the Department of Social Services? At Heaven's Gate? What if I only use my level once every 4 years when I'm hanging new art? What constitutes "regular use" of a level? Is the art "used" regularly? What if I don't closely examine it frequently but it's essence soothes my subconscious regularly? I hope to not "use" my flood insurance regularly. Is having it a glaring example of my consumerism fueling my depression?

Help, this slippery slope is making me depressed!

 

[wappingite]

This is an interesting discussion. I think materialism can work in several ways, including the inverse. I know people who take the art of being cheap to such an extreme level that it rules their lives as much as someone who is a shop-aholic. They spend an inordinate amount of time and stress looking for the least expensive solution, even if they have the money. I think sanity lies somewhere in between.

I'm the point in life that I don't want lots of stuff, but when I buy something I want it to be the highest quality I can afford. Buying poorly-made things in quantity or over and over doesn't really solve anything. It's a false economy. So, I when I decide to make a purchase, I want it to last...I'll spend more on a watch, a screwdriver, a rug because quality is more important to me now. I have no regrets and no depression fueled by these decisions.

I have learned to live life without a big house, and I no longer have a car. You would be suprised how much of a difference this makes if you don't have more space than you really need....you buy less stuff because there is no where to put it! You can enjoy the small luxuries of life without going broke or filling up your home. Something as simple as buying high-end soap that's hand-crafted or buying organic meat from a locally-based butcher brings appreciate to the ways things are made. I'd rather spend a little more on certain things and not fed the Walmart monster.

 

[LaFemme]

As I quickly scanned this thread, two point came to my mind...the first related to what Vince said:



<snip>.

The second thought that came to mind related to this discussion grew from a conversation my mom and I had a few days ago. The local television station was advocating for a toy drive to gather items for low-income kids. A penned area was created in a local Superstore that they encouraged people to drop items in to such as bikes, dolls, and such...however, they strongly encouraged people to just leave cash so that they could buy items that low-income kids had requested on their "Wish List".

So...what is the message that these kids are getting in this process? On Christmas morning a kid gets a bike from a toy drive. Why? Well...because they are low-income. Be poor, get a bike! Did Santa bring it? No. A parent or grandparent? No. Did someone give it to you who knows you and has an interest in you? No. Just a some group of people gave you the bike because its Christmas and you are poor. Am I the only one who thinks that is a horrible message? Does the kid understand the concept of charity...or do they develop a sense of entitlement or low self esteem?

And as for the "Wish List"... if strangers are going to give you free crap because you are poor...then I would think you would accept what they gave you and not present them with a list of items that you want. You accept what you are given, thank them profusely, and be grateful.

Maybe we (Americas) are so caught up in the legend of Santa Clause that we cannot live with ourselves in imagining a kid on Christmas morning with few presents as proof that Santa doesn't love them or has forgotten them. Or...maybe Walmart just wants consumers to think of that scenario as they roll their shopping carts down the toy aisle.

Are we reinforcing the connection between love and self-worth, and dare I say feelings of entitlement to the next generation through Christmas materialism and charity?

As someone who does collect things for toy drives, I have to comment on this.

I see kids living in complete poverty all the time. Their clothes are never new, and they get charity school supplies. I knew a mom who scoured the street and phone booths for dropped change, so she could get a dollar to use at Goodwill to buy a pair of sneakers for her 7 year old son. The school complained that as his were flapping open, they were no longer adequate. Food is inadequate as is everything else in their lives.

Christmas is just another day to these children. They see their classmates getting excited and making wish lists. These kids know that their Christmas is going to be different. Is it their fault that they are poor? Is it their fault that their parents may have addictions? Illnesses? Criminal activity? Did the children ask to be born? No, but here they are. Sure we can judge the parents, send them to social services, but the children do not need to be judged.

Having delivered toys to these households, I see those amazing children go out of their minds with joy, realizing that they are getting a gift. And generally, these kids get ONE charity gift each. Just one.

The reason that organizations may request money as opposed to picking out a gift, is that it's easier to buy for the children who need the gifts. I've seen boys not get a gift because there weren't enough 'boy' toys donated. In addition, teens get forgotten all the time. They don't want dolls or little cars. In our organization we buy Walmart gift cards for teens - 25 dollar ones if we can, less if we can't.

Wish lists help sort toys to families. Wishes aren't generally granted, but if they can...wow, those kids are so happy.

What message are these kids learning? Well, hopefully that the world isn't a cruel place, not all people are mean & uncaring. I hope these kids learn that asking for help isn't a bad thing.

And maybe they won't learn anything. Who cares? I just don't think that the children should be punished for the poverty of the parents on at least one day of the year.

 

[august86]

Christmas has always been about 4 things for me: church, family, food and fun. As long as these 4 things happen every year on December 25th, I am content.

We used to get presents for birthdays and Christmas when we were younger, but it became silly because we ended up choosing our own 'gifts' as we grew older.

To be honest, I'm not sure if I ever believed in Father Christmas. (Avert your eyes: I'm going all JC on ya :tongue My mum always told me that giving gifts to kids at Christmas, is just to convey the feeling that it is a special time of the year, and in fact, JC was the 'real' gift sent for us. So the gift-giving is more for children to comprehend and conceptualise the true meaning.

How the business world was able to commercialise it was quite remarkable, and cunning, as Hick would put it.

With regard to the message sent to underpriviledged kids when giving them gifts, I understand that it might flaw their view of Christmas and affect their self-esteem, but speaking from a country where poverty is prevalent, these kids want to feel special. The other 364 days of their year are pretty shitty, and having even one day where they are acknowledged as human, as special, as deserving, far outweighs. -Of course, if we could help all-year round, that would be even better, although not always possible.

It's quite different as compared to our (often ungratefully bratty) kids who have what they need and most of (if not more than) what they want.

As to materialism, I'm a part-time student and I like living a comfortable life, lacking in superfluity. Don't get me wrong, I like nice things, but they won't stress me out. I appreciate what my hard-earned money buys, even more than that, I appreciate the simple things that others are not fortunate to have.

 

[Rikter8]

Ah, the exceptions. Are these listed in Emily Post? Are they hanging on the wall at the Department of Social Services? At Heaven's Gate? What if I only use my level once every 4 years when I'm hanging new art? What constitutes "regular use" of a level? Is the art "used" regularly? What if I don't closely examine it frequently but it's essence soothes my subconscious regularly? I hope to not "use" my flood insurance regularly. Is having it a glaring example of my consumerism fueling my depression?

Help, this slippery slope is making me depressed!

Everybody needs a mechanic sooner or later. It's an opportunity to offset the cost.

I have extra xanax and Prozac if you need it.

 

[petite]

Turn off your tv. Studies have shown that the more tv you watch, the more material goods you think you need to be happy.

It's been a long time pet peeve of mine how frequently a TV show will have people who have middle class jobs living in homes that they could not possibly afford. I wonder if the expectation that one's life ought to be more lavish doesn't come in part from the fact that almost no one on television lives in a realistically sized home - unless the characters are intended to be mocked or pitied? Only people whom the audience are supposed to laugh at or feel sorry for ever live in a realistically sized place.

 

[D_Bob_Crotchitch]

When you start liking yourself, and stop worrying about others opinions, you will be free. My grandparents didn't have a lot materially. They were very happy. They raised most of their own food (a hobby of theirs), and went fishing as often as 6 days a week. They had a happy retirement. They had both healed enough from their wounds that they could enjoy the company of their little grandchildren.

 

[midlifebear]

Materialism fueling depression?

It's just that puer eternis thing so perfectly illustrated by The Little Prince.

 

[185248]

I don't think there is anything wrong with being a consumer, it's what makes the world go round. I think we become materialistic in western society when we carelessly discard or throw away what we personally do not need any longer. Instead of recycling it maybe. I spose if you look at places in the world where material possessions are meager, treating them as precious is not considered materialistic.

I'm in the building game and hesitant to dump materials that are usable. And they do become usable.

Being a little 'steptoeish' and maybe a wee bit sentimental does not help me either

 

[B_Hickboy]

I don't think there is anything wrong with being a consumer, it's what makes the world go round. I think we become materialistic in western society when we carelessly discard or throw away what we personally do not need any longer. Instead of recycling it maybe. I spose if you look at places in the world where material possessions are meager, treating them as precious is not considered materialistic.

I'm in the building game and hesitant to dump materials that are usable. And they do become usable.

Being a little 'steptoeish' and maybe a wee bit sentimental does not help me either

Interesting point, and one I agree with. In Europe, most of the buildings I've been in, especially residences, are built to last, with an eye toward eventually with repairing them. That's not materialistic, it's good stewardship. In this country, we build cheap shit without a whole lot of thought into what it's going to take to haul it off when it gives out.

It's true materialism that we suffer from here - we buy junk to pile up on more junk, and make a mess disposing of it when it wears out.

 

[185248]

Interesting point, and one I agree with. In Europe, most of the buildings I've been in, especially residences, are built to last, with an eye toward eventually with repairing them. That's not materialistic, it's good stewardship. In this country, we build cheap shit without a whole lot of thought into what it's going to take to haul it off when it gives out.

It's true materialism that we suffer from here - we buy junk to pile up on more junk, and make a mess disposing of it when it wears out.

Fuck off, you're not allowed to agree with me I believe a society can be judged on how wealthy it is not by what it aquires, but by what it throws away.

Western tip sites would be regarded as treasure troves by many in the world. I remember as a kid going to the tip with my dad when we had refuse to dump, finding one time a huge scaletrix slot car track. Came home cleaned it up, joined it together with the one I had... myself and the neighbourhood kids had fun for ages with it. I really have no answers on how to fix the selfishness in society these days, and what must happen to change a mindset which has turned many of us into resource abusers. At one time we were mindfull of what we used, perhaps it came from playing in creeks that were clean and parks that were safe. Now?

 

[185248]

^^^^ That guy is gonna have to stop sayin deep shit like that. He's queer.

 

[B_Hickboy]

^^^^ That guy is gonna have to stop sayin deep shit like that. He's queer.

Only 1%.