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Mental Health And Our Base Needs

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by deepvoicedan, Jan 5, 2020.

  1. deepvoicedan

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    I have suffered with depression, anxiety and low self esteem my whole life.

    As I've gotten older and have been through difficult periods with my mental health, I've started to notice patterns in how I behave or feel.

    When I'm depressed I become much more basic: for example, my sexual urges become stronger and more primal.

    I know that a lot of people lose sex drive when they're depressed so I wonder if anyone else gets like this? And if so is it more a male thing?
     
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  2. 1345864

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    Like you, I've had periods of depression which wax and wane. And my self-esteem is completely gone. Although, my sex drive (as with most people) tends to go down during severe periods.

    I think the effect varies from person to person though; some eat more when depressed, some eat less. Some may feel their sex drive vanish, yet others might use sex as a sort of comfort food, perhaps?

    Not sure if it's a male thing though.
     
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  3. palakaorion

    palakaorion Loved Member

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    When my depression and anxiety isn't well managed, my libido is either nonexistent or very basic and primal. Just wanna bust.

    When I'm in good mental health, all the finer points come back.
     
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  4. Tight_N_Juicy

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    Just gonna copy/paste my response from the neighbor site.. OP, I know you already saw this but I wanted to share with this community too. :sun:

    I suffer from PTSD. I can't explain the extremes I go through when it comes to my sex drive, it's just intense and indescribable. The pendulum swings far and hard for me.

    It's particularly notable that sometimes just the thought of having sex makes me irrationally angry because the reason I have the mental health issues I have is because of my reproductive system. It's a part of why my sexual masochism exists, I have a need.. an *urge* to hurt myself from time to time in order to "punish" my body for what it's done to my mental state. It's developed into a full blown love of the BDSM lifestyle. Some people may not think of that as being healthy, I don't care. I think it's part of what's kept me capable of working and participating in social life while dealing with my symptoms. Depression and anxiety are part of who I am now, but I don't let it define me.
     
  5. twoton

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    I think it could be because orgasm releases feel-good hormones, and having an orgasm can be like self-medication. That's my excuse, anyway.

    What's the sister site?
     
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  6. creek47

    creek47 Loved Member

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    Mental health is of course a hard thing to deal with when we no longer have good coping mechanisms. One of the things I’ve learned is that I need coping mechanisms that are healthy. I’ve picked up jogging so I can listen to music and I’m obsessed with the NFL Draft and frankly this website is also fun.

    One of the bigger issues I will always go back to is the lack of coping mechanisms and the over reliance on medications. Medication alone I beleive isn’t the best solution but a combo of activities along with in some cases medication being the most beneficial.

    The last thing for me; and this is my belief is when i changed my perspective of saying I’m a victim... I’m weak because I have had mental issues. I accepted that this is who I am and instead of feeling sorry for myself I simply thought to myself why can’t I just be the best I can be. Not what people say I should be but what I can be.
     
  7. NCbear

    NCbear Well-Liked Member

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    I used to cope with tremendous stress levels and amazingly strong barriers to healthy self-esteem in graduate school by swimming, bicycling, and walking every single day. I spent hours on keeping myself healthy.

    Now, I have a sedentary job that requires more and more time each year sitting in front of a computer. I think I'll very soon need at least a standing desk if not a treadmill to use while working, unless I can manage to make the time to significantly increase my daily exercise commitment.

    NCbear (whose cardiovascular event on a plane coming back from Mexico last month was a real wake-up call)
     
  8. headbang8

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    When we're depressed/anxious, we comfort ourselves in any way we can. For some, that can lead to unhealthy addictions. A stronger sex drive seems like a relatively healthy way to comfort yourself...assuming it doesn't lead you to act too impulsively or make unwise decisions. Depression is a disease of loneliness, in many ways, and it leads us to isolate. More sex, more comfort, more intimacy might actually be a good thing. It might help you stay present in the moment, rather than future-tripping.
     
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  9. creek47

    creek47 Loved Member

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    I think exercise is not talked about enough and the relation of depression.
     
  10. halcyondays

    halcyondays Legendary Member

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    Lifetime? It sounds like your depression may be more than situational. Please see your GP. Several good antidepressants are available.
     
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