Met a girl but.....

[helgaleena]

I do not think the pic was a lie. She likely sees herself the way she looks in the pic. People generally do not have self-images that are accurate.

You need to ask yourself-- is this category you have in your head about overweight just as inaccurate as her picture? Because you say you have great chemistry.

I have a bit of trouble understanding the difference between a date and friends just hanging out together. I think you should trust your gut and whatever it tells you to do re: spending time with this girl. Because friends are a treasure. You don't have to get physical to enjoy somebody's company. Whatever label you slap on your interaction, there is no real reason to dump her from your life.

 

[D_Tam_Ponds]

I think there are alot of shallow people here. Look around - we're all getting fatter. And YOU might be next. You never know.

So, if you wouldn't date a girl you were otherwise head over heels for because of weight, does that also mean that you'd divorce your future wife for the same reason? And sorry to break it to you, even if you get "lucky" and your gf/wife never becomes overweight (which is unlikely), she will eventually become old. And guess what - that age will likely come with "unattractive" physical characteristics too. And what if the shoe were on the other foot? You gain weight, you age, whatever. Different story then, huh?

Loads of men will tell you that a woman with some meat on her bones is likely to be way better in bed than a woman who has none. It sounds like you don't deserve to find that out for yourself though.

 

[dolfette]

that's a ridiculous post.
we date people who we find attractive.
nobody is shallow for only dating people they find attractive.
can you honestly say that you've never turned a guy down because physically he just left you cold?

he's a young guy looking for a date. he's not talking life partners here.

what's wrong with wanting her to be attractive to him???

 

[HungBx]

Bro def dont go out with this girl. If your not happy with her physically you wont be happy and you will be drawn to other women, this is how people end up cheating and that will do more harm to her than you being truthful with her. Plus she used an pic of her when she looked totally different thats dishonest and a bad sign of things to come. As far as the whole superficial thing thats bs....you know what you want nothings wrong with that.

 

[Gecko4lif]

that's a ridiculous post.
we date people who we find attractive.
nobody is shallow for only dating people they find attractive.
can you honestly say that you've never turned a guy down because physically he just left you cold?

he's a young guy looking for a date. he's not talking life partners here.

what's wrong with wanting her to be attractive to him???

Ah dolfette.

solid gold

 

[upone]

It's interesting the different "takes" we have about this situation. Coach, I don't think you want to take any advice from me. You seem to be a serious dude, looking for a serious relationship. When I was your age I was already practicing the advice Bette Midler would give a long time later: "Your twenties are for sleeping with all the wrong people." Fortunately, I found a lot of women who felt the same way.

 

[D_Jess_Kilme]

So true bud. The message in there to all of the pretty yuoung ones who are so precious about their looks, be aware that it all starts to go at some stage - even yours. So think about it before you next time are so dismissive of somebody who are not quite your ideal dream boat!

Be generous with your kindness and you may one day get some back when you need it.

I heard a joke once, which was along the lines of:---

Fiat Uno cars and Fat chicks are both fun to ride, but don't let your friends see you.

I personally, have always thought it was a horrible joke, but there is a message in there somewhere.

One has to ask the question, is it better to go out with a person who's body type doesn't match your ideal, but that person is a real gem, and everyone you meet can see the magic and chemistry, or, is it better to go out with "body beautiful" who doesn't have quite the same gem qualities.

Good looks and external beauty will all diminish, with time, but a darling will always be a darling, and a bitchy bitch will always be a bitchy bitch.