money vs. love

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by jdoe86, Nov 17, 2003.

  1. jdoe86

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    I have to ask a question to the women out there. As a whole, are women that shallow that money is more important than love? I don't want to group all women like that, but I have had women who feel that money is more important to them than love. Please tell me I am wrong and not all women are "golddiggers"
     
  2. Imported

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    cdex: I've lurked here for a long time, and for some reason this message finally moved me to post.

    I guess I've just been lucky - but my personal experience is that women I've dated have not cared about money. If anything they are just the opposite - my girlfriends have generally hated women "gold diggers" as much as you do.

    In fact, my current girlfriend refuses to let me buy her anything. Whenever diamond commercials come on TV, she changes the channel, angrily denouncing the idea that you should love a man because he buys you a rock whose price has been artificially inflated.

    The irony is that I am actually reasonably well off. Not rich, but fairly comfortable. Well, not quite as comfortable lately, but that's because I bought a small airplane, so who am I to complain :).

    I wonder if the two are related: maybe guys who are comfortable enough financially that they don't generally think or talk about money attract women who also don't particularly care about it.
     
  3. Imported

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    Andrea: In my view, wealth is one of the many reasons a woman may find a man attractive. Just like penis size is a factor, it isn't the be all and end all - it's just one more reason.

    Andrea xxxx
     
  4. Max

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    It isn't just a female thing of course, probably world-wide it is far more common the other way round. Although that is not to say it is the boy falling for a wealthy girl in every case, rather it may be the parents insisting on a large dowry for their son. But a young man falling for a rich girl is not unknown even here!

    [On Sunday night on BBC2 there was a programme about the dowry system in India ... I had no idea it was still so prevalent.]
     
  5. Imported

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    Tender: well it is nice to know a man can take care of you.
    supporting someone however is a far cry different than buying them everything they want and dont need.

    we are broke. :p
    but ah well, i got my 3 babies, and my Sweet Boy, and thats all that really matters to me.

    id take love any day over money.

    now would i stay with a man who refused to work, wanted to live on welfare, and watch tv all day?
    NO WAY!

    geo it is my guess that perhpas some of those women have been burnt on love to where they no longer trust LOVE so they disreguard it as really being genuine. therefore, they cover themselves by making sure he has money.

    Tender
     
  6. Imported

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    palladen: Love OR money?
    Why not both? But if a choice to be made, then love.
    (ok everyone all together .. awwwwww!)
     
  7. Imported

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    rainfletcher: Time for the LPSG resident cynic to raise his voice:

    I am somewhat well - off. I bought a range rover awhile back, and had a girl tell me that it made her fantasize about me. Seriously....and I was married at the time. That reaction was not entirely abnormal.

    I can tell you, honestly, that the perception of wealth is a huge turn-on for very many women. It's not enough, by itself, to get a man a relationship - just like a big dick isn't necessarily enough. But I honestly think it's more of an issue than many women would admit.

    The women I've been involved with seem to have been a tad more interested in my $$ than would make me comfortable. I don't think I was being paranoid - I just think it really is a big deal to alot of women.
     
  8. jdoe86

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    Maybe if I gave all of you a little background. I know of a number of women in my life who claimed to love me, but then as soon as a men who makes more money than me comes in their life, they run to them. Now, I know I am a better lover (they come back to me for that) but they tell me that they can't love me because of financial stability.
     
  9. Max

    Max New Member

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    If a woman really falls for you ... she falls hard, and it will be obvious that neither money, nor penis size, nor any sort of calculation at all will come into it.  

    Perhaps I have just been lucky ... and I am not claiming any sort of sixth sense or special insight, but I am sure that I would not find it all that hard to distinguish real love from the other variety.
     
  10. Imported

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    Tender: [quote author=Rain link=board=women;num=1069124237;start=0#6 date=11/18/03 at 22:45:50]Time for the LPSG resident cynic to raise his voice:

    I am somewhat well - off.  I bought a range rover awhile back, and had a girl tell me that it made her fantasize about me.  Seriously....and I was married at the time.  That reaction was not entirely abnormal.

    I can tell you, honestly, that the perception of wealth is a huge turn-on for very many women.  It's not enough, by itself, to get a man a relationship - just like a big dick isn't necessarily enough.  But I honestly think it's more of an issue than many women would admit.

    The women I've been involved with seem to have been a tad more interested in my $$ than would make me comfortable.  I don't think I was being paranoid - I just think it really is a big deal to alot of women.[/quote]


    any guy who drives a range rover gets extra points!!
    they just have a um nice air to them... sort of a masculine,,,, sexy.......... well you know...

    Rain, i thought i was the LPSG cynic? :D

    perhaps you havnet yet found the right woman?
    not sure, but would seem to me that the right woman would LOVE YOU *more* than your money... the money is just a nice bonus if you have it....

    Tender
     
  11. Imported

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    inquiringmind: Hi,

    This is interesting... I was talking with a man last night who was on his third marriage. He was saying that his second wife traded him in and traded up after she got to a certain plateau. I think there are just basically givers and takers of both sexes. Women may be seen as gold diggers because one of womens' most pressing concerns is security. Many women see a full bank account as a sign that this man will be able to support them and a family too if it come to that... On the flip side I have resented the built in assumption from some of the professional men I have dated that all women were automatically out for their money. I found it to be incredibly presumptuous. It was an instant barrier to getting to know the person better. I will not lie, it would be nice to be with someone who is not constantly struggling. But if the person has the other great characterisitics I am looking for I would count myself lucky. Money can come and go, as can beauty but a good character,  a kind heart and compatibility are what make it last....  

    Inq.      
     
  12. Imported

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    ORCABOMBER: As mentioned by Andrea, I think it's a factor as well, proably slightly more important then most guys probably give credit for.

    After all, it's easier to go to the right places in the right clothes in the right vehicle if you've got the money to do so, right? Not to mention it's easier to be a "sugar daddy". It's a lot easier to be confident when you have money available than if you don't, and as qouted by a friend, "relationships are expensive".

    Just my two cents.
     
  13. Imported

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    wawwiz: There was a survey (yes another survey) about 6 months ago on this very topic, seems 65% of the women out there would marry for money and ("learn to love" the person)!
     
  14. Imported

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    wvalady1968: Maybe that explains our high divorce rate.
     
  15. jdoe86

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    And in California, they get half (and in my case.. all)
     
  16. Imported

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    Tender: :(
    sad for Geo...

    well i suppose some would marry thinking to learn to love.....
    but later they will be sorry.
    money alone will not make a relationship happy.
    id rather be poor....
    it is my experience that you cannot make yourself to love someone...
    so then they will have wasted a good chuck of time and hurts, when they come to their senses... and then as Geo implied here, you lose it anyway. its just stuff.

    Tender
     
  17. Imported

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    aussiechick63: George. You know not all women are golddiggers.
    I would never stay with someone just for money. Why would anyone do that. Money does not buy happiness.I guess that is a very general statement and I am sure there are lots of women that do just that. Just as there are size queens. Nothing will change their mind. Rise above it.
    The rest of what I want to say I will say to you later in private.
     
  18. Imported

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    bblumbee: I agree with many of the post here. NOT all women are golddiggers. However, there are a few. But then, the same rings true for guys as well.

    I prefer LOVE any day over money. I was in a relationship once before where my ex was able to provide for me and did so. I never asked for it; I think he did it out of guilt and of course, jealousy. He actually paid me NOT to work. He did not like the idea of other men seeing me or possibly talking to me. Fortunately, I completed school, earned a Master's, and completed one year of law school before finally realizing that enough was enough.

    You fall for the guy you love because you love him. Money, penis size or anything else becomes obsolete. Love is a strange thing, but is something that you know is real - when in fact it is real.

    And, on another note, realize dear, that some of us women are more than able to financially take care of ourselves. We, too, fight the same battles you've brought up...

    bb
     
  19. jdoe86

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    I looked back at some of my prior relationships and I hate to say it, but money is one of the binders. I had one girl who I was close to marrying and she left me for a guy who had tons of money. I put my ex-wife though school and as you can see, she is not an ex. One of the reasons was money. I have a friend who admits that she wants to have a man take care of her.. I need to win the lotto.. plain and simple :D
     
  20. Imported

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    ORCABOMBER: [quote author=geo8x6 link=board=women;num=1069124237;start=0#18 date=12/01/03 at 18:28:53] I need to win the lotto.. plain and simple :D[/quote]Have a big dick AND win the lotto? Women will be after you like flies on shit! :D

    Well, dogs will at least.
     
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