Monogamy and Bi/Gay Guys???

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by L4S1ICT, Jan 3, 2009.

  1. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    Why for some reason is it so hard to find a guy who want to be in a Monogamy relationship? Every guy I have talked to they want something dealing with sex. I'm not into the one night stand thing anymore. I know I'm young, but I want more than that. I want my first time to be special, I know that sounds so lame and gay, but that is the way I feel.
     
  2. avg_joe

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    You know, I also want a monogamy relationship with the guy whom I really love.
     
  3. B_hungman2500

    B_hungman2500 New Member

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    I am monogamous with guys with really big dicks - if they are too small then I am not so faithful.......is that common?
     
  4. D_skeaflea

    D_skeaflea New Member

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    /facepalm
     
  5. marwan80

    marwan80 New Member

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    L4S1ICT - Both my first hetrosexual and homosesxual experiences ended up to be a monogamous relationships. I think that completely makes sense. I really wanted to take my time "exploring" my feelings and what I want. I think you're on track if that's what you're looking for.

    If it is of any concern to you, my relationship with the girl ended with me moving out of the State (so roughly three months), and my relationship with the guy ended after moving out of the country (six months). I don't regret either of those two relationships.
     
  6. kingkhan

    kingkhan New Member

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    For me I am I have a dilemma becuase, I want to play around with a guy and be monogamous but, I have yet to see myself in a romantic relationship w/ guys so I have mostly just done one off j/o sessions with two guys and with one I saw him for a month but, then he got into a relationship with a guy so I can't play with him anymore. Also, at some point I want a relationship with a women and I would be monogamous to her but, at some point I would get a craving to do something w/ a guys.
     
  7. swoletommyboy

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    I love the idea of being in a monogamous relationship someday, but I'm young and not completely out yet. So I'm afraid that if I try to be serious with someone right now, I'd eventually end up wondering about what else is out there.
     
  8. Primal_Savage

    Primal_Savage New Member

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    After nearly 20 years, following numerous one-night stands and short-term relationships with both guys and women, I'm finally in a monogamous relationship. It's not without all kinds of problems as we live on opposite coasts and only see each other on holidays and about one long weekend per month and choose to remain closeted. Is is worth it? Yes, cause this is the first peron that I can honestly say I love and he feels the same about me. It's also hard, given our past lives which border on being outright slutpigs. This translates into saying NO to fuckbuds (a number of whom have been close buds for years). Perhaps this is what maturity is all about.
     
  9. Corius

    Corius New Member

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    IMHO, the OP is on the right track. Sex ought always to be good, and it will be if it comes about naturally when you have bonded in friendship which has become more than friendship and you both feel the need to express your affection for each other in a sexual way. That was my experience and I was only fifteen; but the relationship lasted through our time in high school. He and I remain good friends to this day and are always grateful for having had our sexual relationship in which we discovered a part of our sexuality which we had not considered before. We loved each other and the sex confirmed the bond between us and only got better with each reconfirmation!
    In comparison to that I can only think of casual sex as a treadmill one is better off to avoid.
     
  10. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    Do you and your boyfriend talk on the phone a lot? I think it would be hard to have a LDR with a guy across the US. The reason for me is cause I would have a trust issue. Even though either way LDR or SDR they still can cheat and you wouldn't know. If I could find the right guy in any location O would try a relationship asap.

    BTW Primal_Savage, Where did you meet your BF from?
     
  11. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    ok than, how many one-nighters do you have in a week or month?
     
  12. swoletommyboy

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    Haven't "been" with anyone in over a year.
     
  13. Gl3nn

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    *cough* generalization *cough*
     
  14. ladsonbehr49

    ladsonbehr49 Member

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    when my last partner died almost 5 years ago I had a short relationship with a very dear man but we could not agree on living in nasty maryland, oxon hill area to be exact and I moved back to south carolina and though I loved him dearly and always will I came back and found men are still the same as it was years ago. my other partner died and I would not have casual sex then or now and I find it amazing that men whom I was interested are now poz and I dont feel sorry for them at all if they are. they choose to have casual sex even after 20 plus years of aids...men dont get it and they think with the wrong head...
     
  15. Stingy

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    I have always had a monogamous relationship with my BF. I think this is a very serious point to make from the beginning. Once you start a relationship with somebody, you work to maintain that relationship. Make it interesting for the two of you!
    I think there are a lot more serious relationship between gay men/couples out there, then we might imagine...

    L4S1ICT, go with your feelings. Don't do what you think is expected from you! If you want to take your time for finding your soulmate, then by all means do so!
     
  16. Hellboy0

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    Though I agree that monogamy is one way to have a fulfilling relationship, not every relationship is the same.

    I think it is more important that couples find common grounds to love and care for each other...sex is only one teeny piece of that puzzle. Relationships also go through changes as people do. And to dump a relationship just because of one or both partners is 'working things out' is just as immature as expecting that you will feel exactly the same about your partner 10 years down the road.

    Love them, stay with them, be prepared to do the hard yards. And it is worth it.
     
  17. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    OIC, is it because you haven't have time, or you just taking a break, or you might just be thinking about a relationship, but just don't know how to approach it?
     
  18. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    ladsonbehr49, I'm so sorry to hear about your partner passing. You are so right a lot of guys can be really nasty scum when it comes to getting sex, especially not caring where it comes from, and not getting tested it see, before going ahead with it. A lot of guys will never learn, just like some females as well.
     
    #18 L4S1ICT, Jan 4, 2009
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2009
  19. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    Thanks you so much Stingy. You just made my day! All I been hearing is that if you don't go out, and sleep around for a little you are missing out on things. I'm not really missing out on anything, except a disease or two. Some people just don't understand. :smile:
     
  20. L4S1ICT

    L4S1ICT New Member

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    So true, you can work out anything when in a relationship, if you truely love one another anything can be fixed.
     
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