[quote author=jonb link=board=relationships;num=1075811612;start=40#40 date=02/07/04 at 18:56:46]The second rule is to make sure everyone you see knows of everyone else. [/quote]
That's not always true. While I feel this way, I once had a partner who thought it was very important that he did not know who I fooled around with, and did not want me to know anyone he was seeing. He used the open relationship as a way to do certain scenes that he didn't feel right doing with me (for example, because they involved degradation or other elements that didn't fit in with our relationship), and as such he didn't want me to know who he was involved with.
It got a little complicated when we were both seeing people who turned out to share an apartment with each other...
That's not always true. While I feel this way, I once had a partner who thought it was very important that he did not know who I fooled around with, and did not want me to know anyone he was seeing. He used the open relationship as a way to do certain scenes that he didn't feel right doing with me (for example, because they involved degradation or other elements that didn't fit in with our relationship), and as such he didn't want me to know who he was involved with.
It got a little complicated when we were both seeing people who turned out to share an apartment with each other...
gushiggins:
To have farm animals, you need a farm. To have a farm, you need arable land. To have arable land, you need to NOT BE IN THE F ING DESERT.
Besides, as always, I think my novelty has worn off, or at least has been outweighed by the growing aspect of getting caught. Who can tell, who can tell. Only she knows what she's thinking, and she's way too intelligent to let on.
It's a shame, though. She was by far the most passionate woman I've ever met, and really wonderful in almost every way.
-Me
To have farm animals, you need a farm. To have a farm, you need arable land. To have arable land, you need to NOT BE IN THE F ING DESERT.
Besides, as always, I think my novelty has worn off, or at least has been outweighed by the growing aspect of getting caught. Who can tell, who can tell. Only she knows what she's thinking, and she's way too intelligent to let on.
It's a shame, though. She was by far the most passionate woman I've ever met, and really wonderful in almost every way.
-Me
Javierdude22: Ya know...I totally agree with CJ on his stance that it is hypocritical to talk about true love when your humping a lot of other people.
Before the torches come out...
At the same tim I realise that this stance I take on this subject, cannot be supported by any form of evidence. I cant even come up with rational, intangible arguments, let alone psychological proof or something.
The thought behind me believing that you need to be faithful to find true love, is maybe more a product of my surrounding and upbringing, than that it is real fact. I am a person with tradition and a strong sense of culture, religion and family life...I think that is a strong determinant on how I feel about monogamy. It sure as hell isnt the only one, the other half that might determine it is my own set of personal values and norms I created over the years, but still, this culture thing is a strong reason I think why I think monogamy is the only way.
And what bugs me, is that I cannot find any reason to support this. Other than 'it is what ive been taught' I cannot think of any reason why having sex with one person increases the emotional bond between the two. I have friends with whom I have strong emotional ties, I dont have sex with them, but do with others. Hm...this kinda bites folks...
Im still voting faithful though...ill find that reason
Before the torches come out...
At the same tim I realise that this stance I take on this subject, cannot be supported by any form of evidence. I cant even come up with rational, intangible arguments, let alone psychological proof or something.
The thought behind me believing that you need to be faithful to find true love, is maybe more a product of my surrounding and upbringing, than that it is real fact. I am a person with tradition and a strong sense of culture, religion and family life...I think that is a strong determinant on how I feel about monogamy. It sure as hell isnt the only one, the other half that might determine it is my own set of personal values and norms I created over the years, but still, this culture thing is a strong reason I think why I think monogamy is the only way.
And what bugs me, is that I cannot find any reason to support this. Other than 'it is what ive been taught' I cannot think of any reason why having sex with one person increases the emotional bond between the two. I have friends with whom I have strong emotional ties, I dont have sex with them, but do with others. Hm...this kinda bites folks...
Im still voting faithful though...ill find that reason
wvalady1968: [quote author=Javierdude24 link=board=relationships;num=1075811612;start=40#43 date=02/08/04 at 17:40:11] I'm still voting faithful though...ill find that reason [/quote]
Javier, I feel the same way. But I'm not gonna say that it has to be the same for everyone. People are SO different, after all.
I started this thread because I learned that someone I have looked up to all my life was incapable of fidelity. It made me doubt the ability for men to truly commit.
Javier, you wrote "I am a person with tradition and a strong sense of culture, religion and family life...I think that is a strong determinant on how I feel about monogamy. It sure as hell isnt the only one, the other half that might determine it is my own set of personal values and norms I created over the years, but still, this culture thing is a strong reason I think why I think monogamy is the only way."
That's so wonderful! Thank you, and Sam and others who have posted along the same line for helping me to trust again.
Allie
:-*
[/quote]Javier, I feel the same way. But I'm not gonna say that it has to be the same for everyone. People are SO different, after all.
I started this thread because I learned that someone I have looked up to all my life was incapable of fidelity. It made me doubt the ability for men to truly commit.
Javier, you wrote "I am a person with tradition and a strong sense of culture, religion and family life...I think that is a strong determinant on how I feel about monogamy. It sure as hell isnt the only one, the other half that might determine it is my own set of personal values and norms I created over the years, but still, this culture thing is a strong reason I think why I think monogamy is the only way."
That's so wonderful! Thank you, and Sam and others who have posted along the same line for helping me to trust again.
Allie
:-*
DizzyGus: When I am in a relationship I don't cheat.
But I'm not in relationships that often so I enjoy my freedom. ;D
I don't fuck every girl I meet, but I do like having options.
Gus 8)
But I'm not in relationships that often so I enjoy my freedom. ;D
I don't fuck every girl I meet, but I do like having options.
Gus 8)
likeitmatters: I thought I would give further thought into this wonderful discussion.
Like I said, I personally am into my partner body and soul and truly content with him. We did make agreement when we first met that if we met a man who was extremely well endowed, I would be allowed to have sex with him..<this was before I found this place> and it would be a one shot deal.
Considering I could make a big cock disappear right down my throat which has been a long long time so I would need practice I think lol.
There was a time when I could take 14 inches down my throat with little or no trouble but that was in the day. I learned from the best however we are getting off to another topic.
Whatever path you choose in your life, just make sure the person you are with is happy and that person makes you happy. It is your life and be it for me or anyone else to tell you otherwise.
Thank you....... :-*
Like I said, I personally am into my partner body and soul and truly content with him. We did make agreement when we first met that if we met a man who was extremely well endowed, I would be allowed to have sex with him..<this was before I found this place> and it would be a one shot deal.
Considering I could make a big cock disappear right down my throat which has been a long long time so I would need practice I think lol.
There was a time when I could take 14 inches down my throat with little or no trouble but that was in the day. I learned from the best however we are getting off to another topic.
Whatever path you choose in your life, just make sure the person you are with is happy and that person makes you happy. It is your life and be it for me or anyone else to tell you otherwise.
Thank you....... :-*
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