More men now reporting relationship abuse in the UK.

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by Drifterwood, Jun 7, 2011.

  1. Drifterwood

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2007
    Messages:
    15,725
    Likes Received:
    386
    Location:
    Fingringhoe (GB)
    BBC News - Women's convictions for domestic violence 'double'

    "Figures obtained from the Crown Prosecution Service showed that almost 4,000 women were successfully prosecuted in the past year, compared with 1,500 women in 2005, a 169% increase."

    I have a close female friend who went to work in the Domestic Abuse field several years ago. She went in thinking that it was very much a crime perpetrated by men against women, but soon came to the conclusion that it is pretty much 50/50 in the UK. And, BTW, that many of the worst victims are never found.

    Serious injury and death are still mostly caused by men, I think, but we gradually seem to be coming to the realisation that a lot of men are abused and have felt helpless to report it. Lady Scotland has been a top advocate for men to report these crimes and to be taken seriously by the authorities which they weren't. Her work seems to be paying off here in the UK.

    Mankind.org estimate that one in six men suffer abuse, my personal take from my closest ten friends is three in ten. I don't really want to discuss the details, but the level of violence was high, none of them ever reported it, they all left their partners because of it, one has still not wished to tell me the full details and the other two only told me after I had known them well for at least seven years. So it may be higher.
     
  2. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Messages:
    42,918
    Likes Received:
    38
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NYC/Honolulu
    I don't know the actual statistics of adults in the US
    but I work with an organization for abused children and it's almost a 50/50 draw of men and woman abusing their children so it seems to make sense that the same 50/50 would be abusing their spouses or significant others.
    Perhaps the reason the stats have risen is men are less uncomfortable reporting it now than before.
     
  3. Drifterwood

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2007
    Messages:
    15,725
    Likes Received:
    386
    Location:
    Fingringhoe (GB)
    That is very interesting to learn. Clearly there are double standards that IMO need to be publicly addressed, and I agree that men have not been taken seriously when reporting abuse.
     
  4. MickeyLee

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2008
    Messages:
    11,800
    Likes Received:
    1,826
    Location:
    neverhood
    my bro-bro spent about three years in an abusive relationship before finally leaving her. she beat him, verbally and emotionally abused him. she manipulated him into thinking most of abuse was his fault.

    the police were called out several times to the house. when the cops arrived the scene was a destroyed apartment, a crying 5' tall woman.. bro-bro got hauled away in cuffs. the cops picked up pretty quick after the first call that he wasn't the problem. future calls ended with the cops encouraging him to press charges. bro-bro was always too embarrassed to put her in jail or was convinced he did something to upset her so much.

    the same problem exists in queer relationships. officials and state/federal funded groups need to broaden the idea of a victim of domestic abuse. more women need to be held accountable for their crimes.

    eta: after the break-up she used the law to get a restraining order against him. to lock him out of his bank accounts and he had to continue paying rent on an apartment he wasn't allowed in. even after she caused enough drama at his office to get fired there was nothing he could really do. men don't get much sympathy or understanding. most folks seem to think a woman could not possible abuse a man. :frown:

    bro-bro is happier now. and has sworn off crazy bitches :smile:
     
    #4 MickeyLee, Jun 7, 2011
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2011
  5. Drifterwood

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2007
    Messages:
    15,725
    Likes Received:
    386
    Location:
    Fingringhoe (GB)
    We have Broken Rainbow UK in the UK.

    I am glad to hear that your bro bro has come through.
     
  6. helgaleena

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2006
    Messages:
    5,663
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Wisconsin USA
    I have relatives of both sexes who mistakenly married abusers. In one case an estranged child was returned to the family fold after reaching adulthood via adoption. As the thread in Relationships section affirms, violence against one's partner is never justified, and if you are that partner, get away.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted