My best friend is a straight guy

FRE

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They are no less homophobic in the UK than they are in the US - not in general terms (lived there). The difference is, is that UKers do not use religion to down gays and lesbians to the same extent; in other words, homophobia is not as nearly reinforced by contemporary religion (most folks in the UK are not at all religious). That does not necessarily make homophobia less intense, but rather "better" justifies it (homophobia is engrained in all Western cultures rooted in Christianity). And honestly, America is getting more and more secular by the day; and I see the day when religious people will be a true minority (look how many states are voting for gay marriage now).

The young generation here, like in England, is much, much more accepting of homosexuality than their parents. And if you live near a big city like New York or San Francisco, people are more open-minded in general, like they would be in and around London.

I often hear also how tolerant Australia is of gays and lesbians. The reality is, is that I lived there, too, and I can tell you they are no more tolerant of gays than we are in the US.


(PS: Some of the most homophobic people I ever met were anything but religious.)

"And honestly, America is getting more and more secular by the day; and I see the day when religious people will be a true minority (look how many states are voting for gay marriage now)."

I think that's because too many religious people fail to practice what they preach and ignore the most important tenet of their religions, i.e., to love other people. And, that love is not supposed to be mere sentiment, but rather, active, such as giving assistance where needed, etc. Turning away from religion began first in Europe because of the experience people had with bloody religious conflicts. The U.S., from earliest times, espoused separation of church and state thereby keeping religious conflicts to a minimum thereby also minimizing negative attitudes towards religion. Of course the stain of slavery, and the horrors of Jim Crow which followed, often supported by supposedly religious people, did nothing to further the cause of religion among people who had a strong sense of social justice.

To what extent this means that people are less religious is unclear. Perhaps they are, but perhaps they are merely turning against organized religion because they see that it often fails to live up to what it presumably believes.
 

dcsurvivor92

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I have a gay friend. When he first said he is gay and loves me, I got so shocked that I didn't know what I had to reply and just gave him a shrug and grin. Honestly, I don't care whether he is gay or not. It's ok he loves a guy, however, it made me confused that it's me that he loves. Anyway, we still have a good friendship. Now, I think it's good to have someone who loves me, no matter who it is.


I'm confused. Did he say he loves you as a friend, or that he is in love with you? There is a difference.
 

B_Hung Jon

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I know it's considerably worse in the U.S. unfortunately, yes. In that respect I'm quite lucky, don't think I've ever had to deal with real homophobia in person. Some ignorance from a friend of mine more-so out of stupidity than homophobia and certainly online, but when I came out all my friends and family were all totally fine with it without exception. Couldn't have gone done better.

Even my ex-girlfriend remains to be my best friend. Not closer with anyone in the world than I am with her.


Cool for you. BTW that "Fear of Clowns" thingy on your site is scary as fuck. :biggrin1:
 

Cyrilsven1

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And I love him so much.

I love that I can tell him I love him, and he tells me. That hardly a night goes by without us texting each other goodnight.

I love that he tells me everything about his relationships and sex life, and is always asking about mine. That I'm going to be his future kids' uncle.

I love that when I told him I am gay (after knowing him a few months) he said "This is going to be so cool," and gave me a hug. That we are completely comfortable around each other despite our differences.

Share your love for the straight guys in your lives!

I am truly very happy for you! Don´t you wish you could have sex with him though, as you might find him attractive or he might be hung?
 

NoH8

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This is a sweet thread. Most of my friends have been straight, both male and female. When I was young I would fall in love with straight friends. They were mostly very kind and patent with me while I tried to sort my feelings out.

These days my friends are more often women. I've had a few boyfriends but except for one, they moved on.

Last night I watched the movie "The Change-Up" staring Ryan Renolds and some other guy. It's about two straight guys, one married one single, who accidentally swap lives. It's pretty funny but what's fascinating is how it develops into a real deep friendship between them that hits them when they swap back to being themselves. The movie ends with them saying "I love you" to each other. It was the same feeling I got from this thread and I think it can be great between a straight guy and a gay guy but the movie showed how close two straight guys could be too.

I think this is a small but significant cultural shift. Another comedy (guys deal with this in humour) is "I love you, man". It ends the same way. So cute!
 

buffaloboy

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Maybe gay male-straight male relationships are somewhat analogous to gay male-straight female relationships in that way? Of course...guys can have that primeval bond that is hard to beat.
.

Primeval bond? What exactly does that mean? Can you give an example?
 
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