My Boyfriend Refuse to have sex and reject his sexuality..

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Marcos88, Sep 27, 2009.

  1. Marcos88

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    My boyfriend is taller than me and bigger man than me,but have smaller dick. We r together for 1 year and 7 months,he was ashamed cause he is bottom and used to tell me that he is top,we didint have sex for like 10 months, and on the end he admitted me that he is bottom and he loves it..we used to have sex very often which is normal and he loves to be fucked hard. but now he say that he dont want to have sex with men at all,his fammily is very old fashioned,and he is starting to hate his sexuality..cause he is shame of it. even he used to love having sex with me... i m horny,but i dont want to make him do something he doest want cause i love him..

    what should i do? i dont want him to hate himself...:frown1:
     
  2. ZOS23xy

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    How old are the two of you? Seems like he is seeing himself in a situation he does not fit into, or he is still working out his feeling about himself.

    It might not be just the sex, but all and everything.
     
  3. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

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    It is difficult for boys and men to work that all out. Give him space for awhile.
     
  4. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    It must be difficult to be gay and live in Serbia. It is my understanding that gays have some rights but not much social acceptance. I also understand that there is a lot of homophobia there as well. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

    I think he may be feeling a lot of pressure from his family and maybe his friends and society to be straight. There's nothing you can do about that. What you can do is to be supportive of him being who he is. Give him compliments, let him know he's important to you, tell him you want him to be happy, and if he needs to be alone for a while, let him do that too. You can't hold on to someone who doesn't want to be with you though, I think, he may not want to be around anyone for a little while.

    You can remind him that things will get better as gays become more accepted. Many times families come to accept a gay member though it can take a long time. It will get easier to be openly gay too.

    For some people it takes a long time to accept who they are and that they can't be what everyone else wants them to be. These people need time to build their identity and self-esteem. They may decide to accept being gay or they may not, sometimes doing both at the same time. There are many conflicts for someone with a lot of pressure, real or imagined, to be straight.

    With me it took a long time. What helped me come out was acknowledging that I had feelings for other men and the strength of friendships with gay men who I admire. It took a lot of supportive people to help me find the confidence in myself to stand on my own. I think if you can do that for your boyfriend, then you're doing all you can. Help him be himself no matter who that is and let him discover it if he doesn't know that already.

    Good luck!
     
  5. B_Nick4444

    B_Nick4444 New Member

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    find someone else for sex -- keep him as a friend
     
  6. chrisj428

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    I would give him some space as well. In fact, hop the next flight to Chicago and you can share my bed for a while. :naughty:
     
  7. Marcos88

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    The thing is i dont want to have sex with someone else..i love him and he loves me.. He is raised with great shame toward homosexuality and things like that..i m 21 he is 22.. i want to give him space to think but he always said that everything is ok..and i know that isnt.. once he even cry.. that broke my heart,i can see great conflict in him..head and heart..

    thanks guys..
     
  8. Marcos88

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    Thnx man..
     
  9. Darkriff

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    You can give him the space he needs without completely letting him go. Give him some time and let him know that whatever he decides is fine by you.
     
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