My dick this, Yo' dick that

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by homelessmandril, May 19, 2008.

  1. homelessmandril

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    anyone who's seen the Harold & Kumar movie will have heard this:

    Mickey Avalon - My Dick

    well, if you've read this far, you've probably heard it regardless.

    so given this is a website about dicks - mine, yours, ours, everybody's - I propose a thread wherein we'll all contribute dick-related rhyming couplets, in an attempt to gain substantial props from the homies. I'll start:

    My dick, blew up the Death Star,
    Yo' dick's, in the back of a police car,





    PS, for those without dicks, there's Margaret Cho and some other people - My Puss

    PPS please dont tell me someone else has already started this thread.....
     
  2. homelessmandril

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    ah, c'mon, play along, this is fun.....

    My dick, ran the 100 metres,
    Yo' dick, like Educating Rita's,

     
  3. homelessmandril

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    My dick, got invited on Oprah,
    Yo' dick, lost down the sofa,
     
  4. marleyisalegend

    Gold Member

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    my dick be nimble
    my dick be quick
    play with the head
    and i'll cum quick
     
  5. homelessmandril

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    My dick, is like a cruise missile,
    Yo' dick, small, it's official,
    My dick, ran against Obama,
    Yo' dick, belongs to yo mama,
    My dick, a Brief History of Time,
    Yo' dick, sucks worse than these rhymes,
     
  6. homelessmandril

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    My dick, designed the Google algorithm,
    Yo' dick, is shaped like a prism,

    My dick, in the Fortune 500,
    Yo' dick, majorly stunted,

    My dick, interviewed in The Nation,
    Yo' dick, plugs into Playstation
     
  7. homelessmandril

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    My dick, needs planning application,
    Yo' dick, dried like a raisin,

    My dick, inflates oil prices,
    Yo' dick, got a mid-life crisis,

    My dick, at the Rio carnival,
    Yo' dick, covered in barnacles,

    My dick, serialised it's memoirs,
    Yo' dick, turns pubs into wine-bars,

    ok i know when my time is up, goodbye all...
     
  8. Mem

    Mem
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    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif]My dick is so big, there's still snow on it in the summertime.
    My dick is so big, I went to The Viper Room and my dick got right in. I had to stand and argue with the doorman.
    My dick is so big, I have to call it Mr. Dick in front of company.
    My dick is so big, it won't return Spielberg's calls.
    My dick is so big, it graduated a year ahead of me from high school.
    My dick has an elevator and a lobby.
    My dick has better credit than I do.
    My dick is so big, clowns climb out of it when I cum.
    My dick is so big, it was overthrown by a military coup. It's now known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick.
    My dick is so big, it has casters.
    My dick is so big, I'm already fucking a girl tomorrow.
    My dick is so big, ships use it to find their way into the harbor.
    My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick.
    My dick is so big, it lives next door.
    My dick is so big, I entered it in a big-dick contest and it came in first, second, and third.
    My dick is so big, it votes.
    My dick is a better dresser than I am.
    My dick is so big, it has a three-picture deal.
    My dick is so big that the head of it has only seen my balls in pictures.
    My dick is so big, Henry Aaron used it to hit his 750th home run.
    My dick is the Walrus, koo koo ga joob.
    No matter where I go, my dick always gets there first.
    My dick takes longer lunches than I do.
    My dick contributed fifty thousand dollars to the Democratic National Committee.
    My dick was once the ambassador to China.
    My dick is so big, it's gone condo.
    My dick was almost drafted by the Cleveland Browns, but Art Modell didn't want a bigger dick than himself.
    My dick is so big, I use the Eiffel Tower as a French tickler.
    It's so big, when it rains the head of my dick doesn't get wet.
    My dick is so big, I could wear it as a tie if I wasn't so afraid of getting a hard-on and killing myself.
    My dick is so big, I have to use an elastic zipper.
    My dick is so big, it has feet.
    My dick is so big, a homeless family lives underneath it.
    My dick is so big, it takes four fat women and a team of Clydesdales to jack me off.
    My dick is so big, my mother was in labor for three extra days.
    My dick is so big, they use the bullet train to test my condoms.
    My dick is so big, it has investors.
    My dick is so big, it seats six.
    My dick is so big, I use a hula hoop as a cock ring.
    My dick is so big, we use it at parties as a limbo pole.
    My dick is so big, King Kong is going to crawl up it in the next remake.
    My dick is so big, it has an opening act.
    My dick is so big I can fuck an elevator shaft.
    My dick is so big, it has its own Wheaties box.
    My dick is so big, I have to cook it breakfast in the mornings.
    My dick is so big, the city had to carve a hole in the middle of it so cars could get through.
    My dick is so big, every time I get hard I cause a solar eclipse.
    My dick is so big, it only plays arenas.
    If you cut my dick in two, you can tell how old I am.
    My dick was once set on fire for a Dino DiLaurentis movie.

    [/FONT]
     
  9. homelessmandril

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    rhyming couplets people, rhyming couplets....

    sorry to be pedantic, but i feel like this thread could become as big as 'Ask a cow', 'Kimiquiesha's Wedding', or even '19yo 8" on yahoo cam' if we all chip in.

    ok, just a few more before i finally f*ck off:

    My dick, big bunch of roses,
    Yo' dick, deep vein thrombosis,

    My dick, defeated 300 Spartans,
    Yo' dick, as portrayed by Steve Martin's,

    My dick, c'est comme une belle weekend*,
    Yo' dick, more like a weak bell-end






    *yes, 'un weekend' is masculine, shutup.
     
  10. D_Thoraxis_Biggulp

    D_Thoraxis_Biggulp New Member

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    My dick is bringing the stampede like a taurus
    Your dick is begging for it's life right before us
     
  11. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    my dick clean
    yo' dick green
     
  12. bigboy9239

    Gold Member

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    My dick... is fit for a trucker...
    Yo dick... is a sad mutha f@#ker...

    My dick...it provides me great protection
    Yo dick..sadly..it can have no erection
     
  13. D_Thoraxis_Biggulp

    D_Thoraxis_Biggulp New Member

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    My dick is like a cruise missile, long hard and agile
    Your dick is Tom Cruise, bitch it's short frail and fragile
     
  14. D_Thoraxis_Biggulp

    D_Thoraxis_Biggulp New Member

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    I call my dick Clark, because it's still going strong
    And I call your dick Cheney, 'cause it's already gone

    My dick is their Everest, it's a challenge to throat it
    Your dick can only say the same because nobody wants to hold it

    My dick's a work of art just like the Taj Mahal
    Your dick is ballpoint graffiti in a bathroom stall

    My dick is so large, they say I'm packin' like a suitcase
    Your dick smells strangely like your little sister's face

    My dick is the king, so bless the monarch's head
    Your dick is like The King, bitch 30 years dead
     
  15. homelessmandril

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    My dick, spins in a circle,
    Yo' dick, like a four-inch Urkel,

    My dick, went ten rounds with Tyson,
    Yo' dick, got a hole with some mice in,


    (ps MAD props for the Cheney line)
     
  16. homelessmandril

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    My dick, the reincarnation of L. Ron,
    Yo' dick, invested in Enron,

    My dick's, in the Sistine Chapel,
    Yo' dick, smells like falafel,
     
  17. homelessmandril

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    My dick, a stunt double in Top Gun,
    Yo' dick, need manual stimulation,

    My dick, walks on the water,
    Yo' dick, takes delivery orders,
     
  18. webnabled

    webnabled New Member

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    My dick, big like a steeple
    Yo' dick, belongs on little people
     
  19. homelessmandril

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    My dick, like Haile Selassie,
    Yo' dick tried to fuck a Cornish pasty,

    My dick, hangs in the toilet,
    Yo' dick's like penne, after you boil it
     
  20. homelessmandril

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    My dick, fell off the planet,
    Yo' dick, arrested, remanded,

    My dick, got a suite at the Hilton,
    Yo' dick, got a layer of stilton
     
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