My Friend Steve, Part II

Discussion in 'Show Off' started by TrentonLuke, May 30, 2006.

  1. TrentonLuke

    TrentonLuke Member

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    Ok, so if you remember "steve" is one of my str8 friends. "steve" is one of my str8 friend who like to be overly friendly with me. when i first posted about the issue people started saying that "steve" was just being a really good friend and not to make any moves so i dont mess it up, I agreed. And ive stuck to it.. ive even tried ignoring him at social events, but he still finds away to be close to me. "steve" just recently started kissing me on the cheek, alot. "steve" also called me honey this weekend.. please some one tell me what to do with him.

    (BTW we have a weekend planned together in a few weeks to go to Lansing and hit up some bigger gay bars together.. odd? idk..)

    Thanks
     
  2. DesertCruiser

    DesertCruiser New Member

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    This reminds me of when I was out of college and living in Chicago and a younger straight friend came to visit. He was more than willing to go to the gay bars with me even though he was straight. When we got back to my apartment, he didn't act so straight. Gay for a night or just can't admit it?
     
  3. yellowman

    yellowman New Member

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    Hey if he is your buddy, talk to him and find out what's up! :33:
     
  4. starter

    starter New Member

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    ya just ask him staight out "you gay?" see what happens
     
  5. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    MAYBE, and I could be wrong.....

    But, maybe he just likes the idea of a good gay friend. HE is becoming comfortable with you, and feels like he can be close to you, much like he can a member of the family, or a female friend.
    It isn't always that he is gay.... yes, the kissing on the cheek is odd. If it bothers you, talk to him about it... just ask him how he he feels about homosexualitty etc.

    He may admit he is curious.
     
  6. Matthew

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    Some straight guys feel kind of "liberated" having a gay friend they can flirt and goof around with. His behavior doesn't necessarily mean he's not really straight.

    On the other hand, it could be a safe way for him to explore some bi feelings or whatever. If you need to find out, honest talk is the only way.
     
  7. TrentonLuke

    TrentonLuke Member

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    Thanks guys! I think maybe i should just ask. Maybe when we go to the gay bars together soon I'll ask him. That way he doesn't have to worry about his other friends being in the know right away.
     
  8. DoodeTwo

    DoodeTwo New Member

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    I would just try to get him out of his pants if I were you.

    But thats just me...
     
  9. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

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    I think Steve gives you every right to ask the question: "How do you feel about gayness, anyway?" No harm. And it might (and might not) clear the air.
     
  10. Capritom

    Capritom New Member

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    First, let me compliment you on your very nice cock. As for Steve, this is the question you have to answer to you self. Do you like him sexually, do you like him in a strong way sexually? If your answer is yes, you should try to negotiate some kind of outcome with him. Proceed as carefully, as avidly as you wish.
     
  11. hotofficeguy

    hotofficeguy New Member

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    I had a close friend like Steve might as well say best friend. We would go clubbing straight bars, gay bars, mixed bars. He was fine with them all, one night on the ride home he leaned over to me and started to kiss me then started grabbing my crotch, undid my pants started sucking my cock. The next day he acted as though nothing happened (confused the shit out of me). The next weekend he called me, i was getting ready to hit the clubs, told me to pick him up so i did then we went to my place so he could get ready, then we had sex, since i am gay and he was straight i bottomed for him. To make a long story short we ended up being fahQ buddies. OMG was he hot, we are both native americans well he's half white in full blooded. Steve might just be "test driving". I wouldnt put any feelings in this one, just see where it goes. I let my feelings get the best of me and ended up getting hurt when he told me he didnt want a relationship, he just liked all the attention that we got when we were together.
     
  12. palicao

    palicao Member

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    hmmm is that so bad?
    a kiss on the cheeks or 2 or 3 kisses doesn't mean anything...
    and calling someone "honey" either

    but i'm curious because is clear there is a cultural difference ^^

    here in italy is quite normal to kiss each other, every time we meet we cheek-kiss.
    and i use term like honey sweetie little cookie or something like that with my friend, without any other purpose than to be nice with the people i love.

    i really can't understand why a "honey" could be so weird...

    but now i understand why an american friend of mine got pissed off with me because i always refer to him as honey, or sweetie. lol

    i didn't know that this thing could be harsh >.>
     
  13. SomeGuyOverThere

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    The thing is that although cheek kissing is acceptable on "the Continent" (this is a UK perspective) and further East, but in the Uk and the USA, men do not kiss each other unless they are partners, it's as simple as that.

    Really, kissing here has a much bigger implication, it isn't a friendly thing, it's a sexual thing - something you only do with a person you are emotionally and physically very close too. Even a kiss on the cheek is regarded as a sexual thing, just as much as a full on, with tongues kiss is.

    Similar with pet names, weetie, honey, etc. are exclusively for your partner or your childeren, but it would only be used when speaking to your child and usually only for a female, a male would be refered to by name.

    With friends, you'd maybe have a nickname, but that'd be a shortening of your actual name. Play names are considered fonly for family or partners.


    @ the original poster
    So, with that in context, it sounds like he's maknig some exceedingly overt sexual advances on you, It sounds pretty obvious he has a thing for you. Perhaps it's time to confront him and clear the air, and if you don't want to go that route with him, then don't. If you do, then do, but you can't ignore it when a friend makes moves on you like that.

    However, your idea of waiting untill you are at a gay bar is a good one - it would be poor form to contront him infront of his other friends - if he feels the need to come out to everyone, then thats something he should do, not something you should drag him into.
     
  14. playainda336

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    Not that I'd do it, but it's quite possible he just sees you like he'd see a female friend with no sexual attraction. I mean he's not grabbing your crotch or anything? And it IS just a kiss on the cheek. In France, they do it all the time, but that doesn't mean they're gay.

    I still say you should leave it alone...especially if he's a good friend.

    Of course I could be wrong and he's flaming, but hey...*shrugs*
     
  15. Matthew

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    I have some close straight male friends who cross that line with flirtatious behavior towards me. I think it can happen because we're clear and comfortable about our own and each other's sexuality. It actually gives them a chance to be affectionate with a man in a way they might not get to do with another straight guy. Ironically, it's like kissing me on the cheek is somehow less of a threat to their masculinity (although some of them are also extra affectionate with each other too).

    I still vote for you're just friends. But as has been said before, talking's the only way to be sure.

    * - none of the above may be construed to imply that I don't think SomeGuy is one of our more awesome posters and wise beyond his years
     
  16. SomeGuyOverThere

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    True, I suppose it really depends on what kind of people you socialise with. Personally though I'd take being kissed on a cheek by another guy (unless it was obviously a joke) quite seriously.

    That's one of those "only you can know, because only you know the full situation" things, but my opinion is htat he probabbly does have a thing for you.

    And I appreciate the comment Matthew. :)
     
  17. TrentonLuke

    TrentonLuke Member

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    I appriciate everyones comments on the issue. Thanks so much!
     
  18. Pene_Negro_Grande

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    I probably wouldn't question Steve....Like someone mentioned he might be exploring his sexuality....Most of all my good guy friends are straight but they get overly affectionate and touchy feely with me too....It is so normal for one of my friends to grab my arse or look, touch or make so comment about my crotch area in jeans....At first it use to make me wonder but then it made me more comfortable with my sexuality....I am kind of dealing with a similiar situation myself....It is weird but I usually don't really into guys but I find myself thinking about him when he is out of town on business....And I know he feels the same way about me because he told me and he calls me quite often even when he is out of the country....And he is very touchy feely and affectionate with me and sometimes I get the vibe from him that he wants to jump my bones....I am pretty such that he is bi-curious at least because of comments he makes about hot guys when we are together....And I think his ex-girlfriend who I am good friends with and they are friends never let's us go home together after a late night of clubbing or sometimes he puts his leg on mine and she comes and sits between us....And recently when we were out of town together, he got tired and didn't want to go back to his room so he jumped in the extra bed in my room and when I went to the lobby for something, guess who had climbed in his bed with him (the ex)....

    Back to the point....I would let Steve reveal his intentions in his own time....I am sure you make him comfortable so I am sure you will be the first to know....If you push it, you may kind of scare off a good friend....That is the only reason I haven't questioned or encouraged any actions of my friend....I value his friendship more than anything....Funny I think I like him so much because we are alike in a lot of ways....I feel he will let me know when he feels comfortable and plus we have a trip together out of town next month and I think the ex isn't coming so maybe he may feel comfortable enough....He always tells me that he doesn't like to do anything to make the ex feel bad because he broke up with her because she was getting into him too much and he knew that he didn't want to marry her so didn't want to waste her time since he did care about her alot....But what woman wants to hear that....Plus their relationship was open but she never took the option but he sure as hell did....
     
  19. EvlMunky

    EvlMunky New Member

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    Hi,
    I have had simliar experience with a couple of my str9 friends. It can be a real arse if you start developing feeligns for them. Try not to invest too much you are more likely to get hurt. Also as open as he is with you pushign it too far and make them back all the way back into their shells and you'll lose that friendship as it was.

    Now granted I believe my friends were a little on the gay side and I won't be surprised if they come out in the future but trying to push them never works... Unless they are really drunk (no comment just *evil smirk* but that is a litle immoral).

    Anyways good luck with your friend let him guide where he wants it to go. Str8 bois bolt... play it cool =) And if nothing happens let it be. Trust me heart broken and no friend is C R A P! =P

    Cheers
    PG
     
  20. Pene_Negro_Grande

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    Yeah pushing can make him bolt away from you especially if he is kind of dealing with his sexuality issues....I lost a friend that way before....One of my "straight" guy friends and I use go out all the time on the weekends....One time we got a little drunk and turned on a little bit talking about sex....We decided to do a little show and tell in the car in the parking lot and I kind of literally took hold of things and we fooled around a little mostly oral stuff....He was really into it at first but then he started questioning his sexuality and it kind of made him freak out a little....He was like we only did that because we were drunk....Our friendship was never the same after that and he soon moved out of town w/o telling anyone....He started getting religious after that....So be careful....
     
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