My gay friend and I

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Passion4Oldies, Jul 16, 2011.

  1. Passion4Oldies

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    Hey All,

    I'm sure you have all read a post like this before, but please bear with me.. I'm 20 and in college and I have this gay friend.. We met earlier in the Spring semester and hit it off as friends. Becoming better and better friends, we started talking more and more and hanging out. A few months into our new friendship, he would start making remarks like, "I want to come over and cuddle with you" and "I think it would be hot if we screwed around" and things of that nature; I figured he was kidding and just played it off. The thing is, is even though I knew he was half-kidding, I was getting kinda hard thinking of it. I told him, however, that if he did ever come over, that he would promise to not do anything or try to make a move.. he accepted.

    So one night he had to get a project done and he came over pretty late and we worked on it together.. he started asking me why and how I was so sure that I was straight and all this stuff. I stood strong and nothing happened that night.

    The next time he came over, we browsed this site together and were just laughing about all the dumb posts, watched some cams and just messed around on the computer.. nothing crazy. So bed time comes and he asks if he could share my bed because the floor was pretty uncomfortable.. I say "sure" and we hop in bed. Now, just a little back ground on myself, I get HARD over nothing. I'll be walking around at work and randomly get a hard on that refuses to go away.. So, naturally, I was rock hard in bed for both that reason and because I had never really shared the bed with someone I knew wanted to mess around with me. So with neither of us being able to sleep, we just talked and what not. I started teasing him by randomly poking him (hoping to make him uncomfortable), and I went too far and totally accidentally brushed up against his dick. I immediately stopped and he was like, "oh shit, I'm sorry man, but I told you to stop poking me!" It was awkward for quite a while and knowing we were both hard, I finally asked if he wanted to jack off. So, long story short, we ended up giving each other hand jobs and fell asleep.

    He came over a few days later and the same thing happened.. shared the bed, started with handjobs and it eventually moved to blowjobs and cuddling and I think he started kissing me a little bit.. This happened another time or two and I enjoyed it each time. I was confused during it cause I'm straight, but after the encounters I actually felt more straight than before I started.

    I know you all hate labels and what not, but I am just kind of confused... I'm totally attracted to women emotionally and physically and plan on getting married, but I also enjoy these random sexual encounters with my best friend. He says it's no big deal and that everyone does it, but I don't know about that. We haven't really hung out in a month or two because of our schedules, but every time I talk to him, I always end up trying to get him to come over so we can catch up and jack off.

    Any thoughts, comments or ideas?

    Thanks!
     
  2. monel

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    Yeah. It sounds like you like the guy - as a person - and he is fun to hang out with. It makes it that much easier to fool around with someone you like. Doesn't mean you want to date him. Don't over think it.
     
  3. D_Tim McGnaw

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    Well it's weird that you're already planning to be married some day, I don't get that as an aspiration, maybe it's a cultural thing.

    In any event, as long as no one is being harmed by what's going on between you and your friend I don't see what the problem is. You should kinda be aware though that if you fool around with your friend it's not like you're just friend's anymore, there's more intimacy.

    But apart from that I wouldn't worry too much, enjoy whatever is happening, don't become too hung up on what it means rigth now, but remember to think about your friend's feelings, if he's genuinely cool with this and he isn't developing romantic feelings for you it's OK, but if he is kinda falling for you then you could end up hurting him and losing a good friend. Just be sure you're both being upfront and honest with eachother.
     
    #3 D_Tim McGnaw, Jul 16, 2011
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2011
  4. Passion4Oldies

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    Well, any and every time I imagine myself in the future, I always see a beautiful wife and a huge family; it's one of my most important goals in my life.

    And yeah, we are both cool with it.. He is kind of seeing someone right now (nothing official or dating), and I ask him every so often if we are allowed to still mess around.. He always says sure, but as soon as it's official, we can't (which is understandable).

    I don't think he is really interested in me, other than us being great friends and having this little fling on the side. I can tell that I am getting kind of attached to him a little more because of this intimacy that we have shared, but I think that that is just normal. Plus, I'm kind of the jealous type. Thanks for the input you guys!
     
  5. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Fair enough :wink: There's no reason that what's going on right now between you and your friend should change your goals.



    Well do you think you'll be kinda pissed when or if your friend starts having a proper BF and stops fooling around with you?
     
  6. Passion4Oldies

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    I don't think I'll be pissed.. I'm pretty sure I'll miss it though.. Like I said, we haven't really hung out in a month or two, so it's been a while. Being the type of person I am, I feel like we don't talk as often as we used to, but it makes sense because he is pursuing another man! So I guess it's just balance.
     
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