My problem...

[KTF40]

@Wish 4-8- No man, it wasn't lousy because of my "big dick". It was lousy because she didn't have a clue of what she was doing. And no, I don't want to be so big that I cause pain to every girl, but it seems pretty clear to me that in general from experience, what I've heard and read, girls would prefer a dick that is bigger than mine. Not this asian girl, but most other girls.

For example, the asian girl told me how she complained to her friends that her ex was "ginormous" (the guy was at least 7 inches) and her friends told her bigger is better and couldn't understand why she was complaining. Those friends perspectives is what scares me. Whether a girl will tell you that straight up or not, in general they prefer a big dick. I don't have that, and that's why I feel so insecure.

@rackrackrack- I wish I could be content and happy with what I got like you and your friends, but I can't be. As I've said earlier in this thread, some type of therapy may be in order if my condition gets worse. I'm not really in the position to do it now, but maybe eventually.

 

[SomeGuyOverThere]

@SomeGuyOverThere- You made a lot of great points. Practically everything you said I agree with. The only thing is, the whole idea of "GET THE FUCK OVER IT" is so much easier said than done. Like I said, the only thing I know that can solve this problem is if my dick grew an inch, but maybe psychiatric help is something I'll have to look into if this doesn't get any better.

I would disagree with you on your assessment of craigslist though. Your location says your from Scotland so perhaps you have had different experiences with it there compared to myself in the Washington DC area. The girl I was in the 8 month relationship with I found off of craigslist. She was very normal, except she had a high sex drive like me. Even the asian girl I mentioned in the original post seems to want a relationship with me and I met her from cl. Don't get me wrong though, there are some serious wackjobs on there (particularly some of the males).

Do keep getting help on the table mate - thinking obsessively is a mental health problem, there's no two ways about it, and mental health problems are serious health problems.

Re Craigslist, well that was my impression from the dating pages in certain areas of the USA where I've lived. We don't use Craigslist in the UK really, we have an equivalent called Gumtree, but I don't think it's very often used for dating - certainly the relationships pages are pretty empty.

 

[the_reverend]

the only way your size is going to negatively affect you with girls is if YOU let it. it's all a mental game. hell, you're about my size (a fraction shorter, a fraction thicker) and every girl i've been with has said i was big, if not their biggest. you're letting ONE girl get in your head...and not even that, you're twisting around what she said to get into your own head. 5 out of 60 is nothing to feel bad about. you made the girl squirt for crying out loud and she told you your size wasn't a problem at all...YOU pushed her until she said something YOU could conform to YOUR insecurity. you're going to be too big for some girls, for some you might be too small and for plenty of them, if you know how to use it, you'll be just right. you can't control your size. all you can control is how you use it, your abilities in other areas and your perception of your dick and yourself. hell, i know plenty of guys a LOT smaller than you who get lots of action with VERY satisfied ladies. so get out of your head because that's the only place you can fuck it up every time.

 

[B_Hung Jon]

To me this is a problem that is tribal at heart. I think as more advanced males, we can maybe begin to leave all this competition bullshit back in the 20th century. When I look at other guys, I don't see some monster trying to steel my woman or someone who wants to destroy me. Hopefully in the near future, guys can begin to view each other as brothers and friends rather than "bigger dicks" to fight off and kill. I don't want to compete with my male friends. I want to support them in their life goals, help them find good mates and raise our children in a more peaceful and compassionate world. I think competition over dick size is as silly as competition over eye color. At a deeper level, who really cares? We need to rise above our more primitive instincts.

 

[D_Mylor Mentallydaft]

To me this is a problem that is tribal at heart. I think as more advanced males, we can maybe begin to leave all this competition bullshit back in the 20th century. When I look at other guys, I don't see some monster trying to steel my woman or someone who wants to destroy me. Hopefully in the near future, guys can begin to view each other as brothers and friends rather than "bigger dicks" to fight off and kill. I don't want to compete with my male friends. I want to support them in their life goals, help them find good mates and raise our children in a more peaceful and compassionate world. I think competition over dick size is as silly as competition over eye color. At a deeper level, who really cares? We need to rise above our more primitive instincts.

there is a 21 volume set of books called "the history of rome", read the last 4 books....... loosing touch with the primitive in pursuit of the rational mind is unwise and weak. its how all countries fall and a very common way men loose, a balance is the best way to go in all things.
personally my life motto for the past 6 or 7 years has been,

"hope for the best plan for the worst and expect nothing"

to the O.P , man there are guys with bigger dicks, better looking and richer than you........ and honestly it ALL matters, and no relationship lasts forever. but SPH fetishes go on and on and on

 

[stlbigman]

WHY WHY WHY are guys sooooooo obsessed with length? If u r nearly 7 X 6, that's more than enough. So what if you're not porn star quality? It sounds like u need a confidence booster or maybe a few sessions with a shrink to get your head (lol) straightened. Just relax. I've seen men with 4 and 3 inches! Let that sink in...you can't please ANYBODY (guy or girl) with that. Get a grip or you will never enjoy sex and that would be a shame.

 

[KTF40]

@the_reverend- True, I did push her into saying what I wanted to hear. But what she says is the truth and seems to be a general consensus of what all women think inside. They prefer a bigger dick, and in my case a longer one than what I have.

@Hung Jon- No offense dude, but that's pretty easy for you to say. You're Hung Jon. I'm sure if you were 2-3 inches smaller and less thick you would have a different view. And I don't view guys with a bigger dick as the enemy or anything. I just feel inadequate to them.


@stlbigman- Trust me man, I fully realize my size could be worse. But like I said earlier, things could be A LOT better.


Anyways, I think it's pretty cool that you guys actually bothered to comment on my situation and I appreciate that. I'm not in the position to get any mental help or anything, but I'm going to start some PE so maybe that will help. Perhaps if I become a true 7 inches that might help my confidence a little.

 

[silentview]

CONFIDENCE outweighs cock size every time. hell, it might just take you some practice to build experience and with that experience will come naturally a sense of confidence which you can bolster by just getting it in your head that it doesn't matter.... besides what the fuck does it matter if you're the best on every one's sexual lists of conquests. If a woman cannot accept you for what you are (or vice versa) then you're just not meant to be; that happens, a lot, so move on.
In a grand scope; size, money, looks all matter but when it really counts it won't.
Use what you've got, learn to love what you've got and if it makes you feel better about yourself go ahead and tug on it.

 

[the_reverend]

@the_reverend- True, I did push her into saying what I wanted to hear. But what she says is the truth and seems to be a general consensus of what all women think inside. They prefer a bigger dick, and in my case a longer one than what I have.

no, you INTERPRETED what she said to fit your insecure view of reality. why are you hung up on the four guys she ranked better than you? why not acknowledge the 55 guys in your wake? one of the guys ranked above you has a smaller dick than you...if what she says is the truth, then pay attention to ALL of it! You rationalize it away by saying he's really good looking and great at oral...so CLEARLY she values those things just as much if not moreso than penis size. you're also extrapolating one woman's opinions and applying them to all women...because NOT all women prefer a bigger dick. you need only read posts here to find that out. i've known plenty of girls who prefer more average sized and smaller penises (which, again, you DON'T have...or else i'm small too, and i KNOW that's not true. ). and you were just with a girl who couldn't handle your size. reality is against your neurosis on this one, friend. the facts don't add up to the solution you've reached. try conforming your attitude and self perception to those same facts and that same reality and appreciate what you've got instead of lamenting what you don't. because even by your own biased account, what you've got is quite a bit. you just need the confidence to use it properly.

 

[Wish-4-8]

To the Reverend:
Just an observation. You give great advice. I agree with you 100%. Basically, size is not the end all of all things sexual. But all he has to do is read your sigline and get all confused again. I sure am confused about where you really stand on the size issue. And this is coming from reading your other posts on the issue.

Can you please explain your sigline. As wise as you posts sound, I am beginning to think you sigline is just ironic satire. True or False?

 

[the_reverend]

To the Reverend:
Just an observation. You give great advice. I agree with you 100%. Basically, size is not the end all of all things sexual. But all he has to do is read your sigline and get all confused again. I sure am confused about where you really stand on the size issue. And this is coming from reading your other posts on the issue.

Can you please explain your sigline. As wise as you posts sound, I am beginning to think you sigline is just ironic satire. True or False?

false. there's a difference between "size matters" and "bigger is better." of course size matters...it matters as much to my lady friends who get a thrill out of the big ones as it does to the ones who prefer more average and smaller sized penises. it matters both physically and mentally. it matters in the same way height and breast size and eye color and kissing ability matter, in that it's a trait around which people can build preferences. but that doesn't mean bigger is always better or more preferable to every single person. what's perfect for one person might be too big for someone else. what's too small to one might be ideal to others. to say it doesn't matter at all is a lie, and like all lies (and faked orgasms) does more harm than good, which is what the quote is intended to subvert.

it should also be noted that it is far from the only thing that matters. the professing of one criterion or preference does not exclude all others.