- Joined
- Aug 11, 2006
- Posts
- 393
- Media
- 2
- Likes
- 4,557
- Points
- 748
- Location
- Florida (United States)
- Gender
- Male
Trulybig, talk about finding the most appropriate website for my lifetime! Let me tell you about me.
I am a married male with a family, children, enjoy sex with my wife as I have with other women in my past (and a couple of brief affairs) so no one would ever know that I am turned on by big penises and secretly meet with well-endowed men for sex. What significant life events led me in this direction? Many! But, I think there were several that definitely stand out.
I was raised with the concept that you date women, and eventually marry and have kids. So thoughts about other guys were never really a focus and repressed for the most part. In fact, if I had any thoughts about other guys I would feel horrible and hate myself for it. Nevertheless, my first male fascination was actually not size but public hair. I was a late bloomer and so guys that had a nice full bush of hair I admired and got my jealous attention. But this focus of looking at other guy’s penises at some point I began to wonder and notice the sizes too. I came across one fellow student in the locker room who had a really big cock and I was excited but also had a pit in my stomach how impressive it looked and how mine didn’t. My thoughts at that time were jealousy and thinking about how the girls would be intimated, scared, but also had to be respectful of such a massive penis. He was slight of build yet would have stretched any of those girls out to the hilt. So, I think there was a submissive side that I felt had to occur with anyone being involved with a guy like that who had a penis that big. Plus, I could only begin to wonder and imagine how enormous it would be fully erect. I also was extremely curious about what his life was like or how he viewed himself but was too shy to even get to know him.
A year or two later as I had matured, I read a sex education book that said smaller penises grow proportionately larger than large flaccid penises when erect .It stated they all pretty much even out in erect size. At first I believed this but then would consider that like the guy I just mentioned above was way bigger than my erect penis soft so how could that really be true? Then, I read some erotic books and I remember one was Fanny Hill where they talked about 8 and 9 inch penises and how big they were and fucked the woman way better. So, I got a ruler wondering what I measured.
I have a 5 1/4” long cock and about 4 ½” in thickness around. Not bad but certainly not very long. But, I still figured I was like most guys but nothing of the sexual superiority and prowess as described by size in those stories. I eventually also started reading things like Penthouse Forum stories where there were always a couple stories about some women having sex with a well-endowed lover and how much better it felt for her.
I eventually met a girl and we sort of had a friendship more that a dating situation. Nevertheless, one day we decided let’s show each other what we look like naked. We both stripped and she layed back and spread her pussy open for me. That was a great turn on so when I stood up and pulled my pants down, my cock was fully hard sticking up in the air. She looked at it with somewhat of a curious frown. She asked me, after looking at it carefully, “Does it get bigger when it is soft?” She was totally serious in tone. I laughed and said, “No, why?” She explained that her sister had a picture book of naked guys and their penises hung down much bigger than my hard one. That cut me like a knife even though she clearly said this innocently without any hint of trying to hurt my feelings. She just was matter of fact not understanding and that ended the experience (we were not intending to have sex). However, this incident began to make me realize that my penis was certainly not large erect and that there were much bigger ones out there. But, still I wasn’t sure if it was rare for only a guy or two to be very big. However, after that I was slightly reluctant to be naked in front of women.
The next situation that did occur was a wealthy friend having a party. His parents were not at home and he had a pool. A number of the attendees decided to skinny dip. I was reluctant but again I am not small or that different than a number of guys so I thought and I joined in. But, the friend when he stripped made it obvious why he facilitated a skinny dip. He had a big and very thick round penis that kind of stuck out from his body, not erect but still not the type that just hung down. It might have been because he also had a big set of balls and a couple of the girls clapped and laughed when he stood up to jump in and them commenting. It made me so jealous even though they were joking but yet in a way they weren’t. The women didn’t do this for anyone else and obviously his big penis caught their attention. It was also the first time I believe that I felt an urge and a real desire to touch it as well. I wanted to know how big it would be erect and already it was so much thicker than mine it certainly must of been formidable when full. But, these feelings left with me with shame.
As I mentioned, Penthouse Forum stories and similar magazines eventually had me masturbating to the stories where a wife or girlfriend would experience a much bigger penis and would describe how much better it was sexually for them. I really wanted to know if it were true, would bigger feel better to a woman and so many stories or books indicated this. It certainly seemed to make sense. I also wondered did other guys think about these things and especially the guys who had a big penis did they have a different life experience than me sexually.
I started dating this one girl (Karen) and over a number of months it was becoming serious enough that the possibility of us being married seemed real. I remember we were introduced by her Aunt who worked where I did, and the Aunt was the type that was pushy. Everything was going well until one day months later Karen and I were talking about her having lived 6 months prior in New Jersey. I knew she had dated and had lived with a guy named Dusty and I asked if she ever heard from him. You mean “Little Dusty” she asked. I looked at her inquisitively and asked what she meant. Karen explained she was only slightly taller than Dusty and so she and her friends joked in using that term. So, I said well that’s too bad I guess he was little all over accompanied by a slight laugh. Karen looked at me and smiled and said, “Well……………………..no not everywhere and in fact” she then made this eye rolling motion and added, “That part was amazing.” I turned red which she noticed and laughed making fun of me, “Oh now you want to change the subject.” What she didn’t realize was that I had immediately lost interest in her as I felt that I did not want to spend the rest of my life with a woman that felt so proud and happy about being with a much better endowed man in her past and forever being second class knowing my size in that regard to her. Now retrospectively I might feel different now, but at that time it is was exactly how I felt. I started coming up with excuses to not be able to go out with her and we drifted apart. It was not due to her, but I did leave the job and so ended that relationship.
Over the next few years I did date, had some sexual relations and penis size or my size was never an issue with any woman except wishing I was bigger in my mind. But, at the same time, I would also go to Adult bookstores or even purchase publications like Hustler and would masturbate comparing my penis with the bigger ones often in these various magazines. I did the same thing with videos. There were tons of men with bigger penises than mine and it was difficult to figure out to what statistical extent were all the great amount of bigger penises and many much bigger than mine. How could I ever really know what matched the normal male population. However, with so many in all these publications that showed so many men significantly bigger it certainly seemed like any sexually active person would have some experience at some point with a big dicked guy. Plus, in jacking off to these items it made me more and more desiring to experience being with a well-hung guy too.
I am a married male with a family, children, enjoy sex with my wife as I have with other women in my past (and a couple of brief affairs) so no one would ever know that I am turned on by big penises and secretly meet with well-endowed men for sex. What significant life events led me in this direction? Many! But, I think there were several that definitely stand out.
I was raised with the concept that you date women, and eventually marry and have kids. So thoughts about other guys were never really a focus and repressed for the most part. In fact, if I had any thoughts about other guys I would feel horrible and hate myself for it. Nevertheless, my first male fascination was actually not size but public hair. I was a late bloomer and so guys that had a nice full bush of hair I admired and got my jealous attention. But this focus of looking at other guy’s penises at some point I began to wonder and notice the sizes too. I came across one fellow student in the locker room who had a really big cock and I was excited but also had a pit in my stomach how impressive it looked and how mine didn’t. My thoughts at that time were jealousy and thinking about how the girls would be intimated, scared, but also had to be respectful of such a massive penis. He was slight of build yet would have stretched any of those girls out to the hilt. So, I think there was a submissive side that I felt had to occur with anyone being involved with a guy like that who had a penis that big. Plus, I could only begin to wonder and imagine how enormous it would be fully erect. I also was extremely curious about what his life was like or how he viewed himself but was too shy to even get to know him.
A year or two later as I had matured, I read a sex education book that said smaller penises grow proportionately larger than large flaccid penises when erect .It stated they all pretty much even out in erect size. At first I believed this but then would consider that like the guy I just mentioned above was way bigger than my erect penis soft so how could that really be true? Then, I read some erotic books and I remember one was Fanny Hill where they talked about 8 and 9 inch penises and how big they were and fucked the woman way better. So, I got a ruler wondering what I measured.
I have a 5 1/4” long cock and about 4 ½” in thickness around. Not bad but certainly not very long. But, I still figured I was like most guys but nothing of the sexual superiority and prowess as described by size in those stories. I eventually also started reading things like Penthouse Forum stories where there were always a couple stories about some women having sex with a well-endowed lover and how much better it felt for her.
I eventually met a girl and we sort of had a friendship more that a dating situation. Nevertheless, one day we decided let’s show each other what we look like naked. We both stripped and she layed back and spread her pussy open for me. That was a great turn on so when I stood up and pulled my pants down, my cock was fully hard sticking up in the air. She looked at it with somewhat of a curious frown. She asked me, after looking at it carefully, “Does it get bigger when it is soft?” She was totally serious in tone. I laughed and said, “No, why?” She explained that her sister had a picture book of naked guys and their penises hung down much bigger than my hard one. That cut me like a knife even though she clearly said this innocently without any hint of trying to hurt my feelings. She just was matter of fact not understanding and that ended the experience (we were not intending to have sex). However, this incident began to make me realize that my penis was certainly not large erect and that there were much bigger ones out there. But, still I wasn’t sure if it was rare for only a guy or two to be very big. However, after that I was slightly reluctant to be naked in front of women.
The next situation that did occur was a wealthy friend having a party. His parents were not at home and he had a pool. A number of the attendees decided to skinny dip. I was reluctant but again I am not small or that different than a number of guys so I thought and I joined in. But, the friend when he stripped made it obvious why he facilitated a skinny dip. He had a big and very thick round penis that kind of stuck out from his body, not erect but still not the type that just hung down. It might have been because he also had a big set of balls and a couple of the girls clapped and laughed when he stood up to jump in and them commenting. It made me so jealous even though they were joking but yet in a way they weren’t. The women didn’t do this for anyone else and obviously his big penis caught their attention. It was also the first time I believe that I felt an urge and a real desire to touch it as well. I wanted to know how big it would be erect and already it was so much thicker than mine it certainly must of been formidable when full. But, these feelings left with me with shame.
As I mentioned, Penthouse Forum stories and similar magazines eventually had me masturbating to the stories where a wife or girlfriend would experience a much bigger penis and would describe how much better it was sexually for them. I really wanted to know if it were true, would bigger feel better to a woman and so many stories or books indicated this. It certainly seemed to make sense. I also wondered did other guys think about these things and especially the guys who had a big penis did they have a different life experience than me sexually.
I started dating this one girl (Karen) and over a number of months it was becoming serious enough that the possibility of us being married seemed real. I remember we were introduced by her Aunt who worked where I did, and the Aunt was the type that was pushy. Everything was going well until one day months later Karen and I were talking about her having lived 6 months prior in New Jersey. I knew she had dated and had lived with a guy named Dusty and I asked if she ever heard from him. You mean “Little Dusty” she asked. I looked at her inquisitively and asked what she meant. Karen explained she was only slightly taller than Dusty and so she and her friends joked in using that term. So, I said well that’s too bad I guess he was little all over accompanied by a slight laugh. Karen looked at me and smiled and said, “Well……………………..no not everywhere and in fact” she then made this eye rolling motion and added, “That part was amazing.” I turned red which she noticed and laughed making fun of me, “Oh now you want to change the subject.” What she didn’t realize was that I had immediately lost interest in her as I felt that I did not want to spend the rest of my life with a woman that felt so proud and happy about being with a much better endowed man in her past and forever being second class knowing my size in that regard to her. Now retrospectively I might feel different now, but at that time it is was exactly how I felt. I started coming up with excuses to not be able to go out with her and we drifted apart. It was not due to her, but I did leave the job and so ended that relationship.
Over the next few years I did date, had some sexual relations and penis size or my size was never an issue with any woman except wishing I was bigger in my mind. But, at the same time, I would also go to Adult bookstores or even purchase publications like Hustler and would masturbate comparing my penis with the bigger ones often in these various magazines. I did the same thing with videos. There were tons of men with bigger penises than mine and it was difficult to figure out to what statistical extent were all the great amount of bigger penises and many much bigger than mine. How could I ever really know what matched the normal male population. However, with so many in all these publications that showed so many men significantly bigger it certainly seemed like any sexually active person would have some experience at some point with a big dicked guy. Plus, in jacking off to these items it made me more and more desiring to experience being with a well-hung guy too.