My silly straight friend.

CUBE

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So, I have this straight friend. He is well adjusted and can be affectionate to anyone. I get a hug and kiss hello and goodbye. He has stated before to our friends that had he’d been gay we’d be together. I am flattered he thinks this but it also makes me laugh. Like in his mind, that is the only thing stopping me from being with him. Like my feelings have no bearing. I must of course want him too! Lol.

Anyone else have these stories that are fun but give you pause.
 
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I must of course want him too! Lol.
Is he right tho ;)

The husband of a friend is a bit like that with me - quite arch and flirty, sometimes pretending that if his wife wasn’t there we'd be making out. She indulges it. Like he'll say, 'Come upstairs, close the baby stair gate behind you, they won’t be able to get to us in time'. Sure he doesn’t fancy me and I certainly don’t fancy him, but I get kind of hysterical around him, it's pathetic. But there's no design or presumption on either side, no tension, just silliness.
 
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Infernal

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I have a friend who started out as a neighbor. He would pinch my nipple and make passes at me. It was all in good fun. We ended up living in different parts of the country for a few years. I was helping him with a project and we talked on the phone or through email almost daily. He was always flirting with me and I would reply that I was going to tell his wife, or he was going to have to put his money where his mouth was. Finally he said, "Alright, I'll make out with you. I can take one for the team." When I told him he's long past the point of making out he backed off. Now we live about a mile apart and I sometimes run into him at a local convenience store. He's still super sweet, but he's put on 100 lbs in the last 3 years and I'm just not feeling it anymore. It's a shame because when he lived next door he had zero body fat and would answer the door in his boxers.
 
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LilJock

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On the other hand, I have a gay friend who maintains that anyone can be had, no matter how straight they might claim to be. I won't dispute his general proposition, but for that to be true for me, he'd have to shed fifty pounds, fifty years and fifty percent of his bank account. Like most who make claims like that, he's far from being irresistible.