Hello all,
I havent been a member long but I would like to share my story or problem or whatever you want to call it. First I love to show off. I am not the biggest, never would say it or claim to be but I love the reaction I get from women when they see me for the first time as im sure everyone else does. It all started about 1995 when I guess I discoverd I had a "big" penis. * side note I didnt really start having sex until I was 25, lost my virginity at 19 but didnt have sex again until 25, another long story * so I never really had any feedback on my size. In 96 I discoverd the internet and online sex chat. This was followed by taking pictures of myself and sending them to a women I was talking to online. The feedback I got from that hooked me. Never had that kind of attention before. This evolved into the online cam. Got even more attention and I guess ego stroking from that. By the time I met my current wife, that was my thing. Show off online and hook up with as many women as I could. Well my gf (wife now 8 years later) said stop it or I am gone. She didnt like me showing to other women. Well I did the right thing and stopped. This was in 98 when I "stopped". I never really got rid of the urge but felt my relationship followed by my marriage were more important. I have slipped a few times over the years and have showed off online. Usually when she would be gone for a few days. I have never cheated on her or really had the desire to cheat, I just like to show off. I should state that she has a total of two times allowed me to show off for her friends, the last time being in 01, which was a complete rush for me. That has since been baned as well. I guess my question for everyone or anyone is what should I do? Does my showing off constitute cheating? Our marriage is in the shitter right now and maybe that is why I am getting the urge again to show off. I get ZERO attention from her and that fact makes it hard for me to generate any romance or basically anything unless Im really horny. Sad yes but that is the state of things. It sucks. It is a good thing Im not any bigger because I WOULD be out there showing it and getting myself into trouble. As I write this one things stands out and the basic fact is I need attention and showing is my way of getting it.
I will end this book with a thank you for any advice you all can give me. Take care all.
I havent been a member long but I would like to share my story or problem or whatever you want to call it. First I love to show off. I am not the biggest, never would say it or claim to be but I love the reaction I get from women when they see me for the first time as im sure everyone else does. It all started about 1995 when I guess I discoverd I had a "big" penis. * side note I didnt really start having sex until I was 25, lost my virginity at 19 but didnt have sex again until 25, another long story * so I never really had any feedback on my size. In 96 I discoverd the internet and online sex chat. This was followed by taking pictures of myself and sending them to a women I was talking to online. The feedback I got from that hooked me. Never had that kind of attention before. This evolved into the online cam. Got even more attention and I guess ego stroking from that. By the time I met my current wife, that was my thing. Show off online and hook up with as many women as I could. Well my gf (wife now 8 years later) said stop it or I am gone. She didnt like me showing to other women. Well I did the right thing and stopped. This was in 98 when I "stopped". I never really got rid of the urge but felt my relationship followed by my marriage were more important. I have slipped a few times over the years and have showed off online. Usually when she would be gone for a few days. I have never cheated on her or really had the desire to cheat, I just like to show off. I should state that she has a total of two times allowed me to show off for her friends, the last time being in 01, which was a complete rush for me. That has since been baned as well. I guess my question for everyone or anyone is what should I do? Does my showing off constitute cheating? Our marriage is in the shitter right now and maybe that is why I am getting the urge again to show off. I get ZERO attention from her and that fact makes it hard for me to generate any romance or basically anything unless Im really horny. Sad yes but that is the state of things. It sucks. It is a good thing Im not any bigger because I WOULD be out there showing it and getting myself into trouble. As I write this one things stands out and the basic fact is I need attention and showing is my way of getting it.
I will end this book with a thank you for any advice you all can give me. Take care all.