My sympathy goes out to all the women who...

ManlyBanisters

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well not saying they should do that...but hey...take it as a compliment. Guys see guys as competition...the fact they think you're hot is a good thing. I just smile when it happens... The only time I get pissy is when people get overly aggressive, or it begins to be creepy.

Don't you fucking DARE tell anyone how to feel about this shit! :mad:
 

OCMuscleJock

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what Ms. Dolfette says.

no random asshole has ever shouted out anything that flattered me.
even worse, they single out my girlfriend. homicidal impulse is my flavor.
:irked:

thankfully i am an evil cunt. can fillet a man's dignity in five words or less :biggrin:

hahaha I'm the same way... piss me off enough and no one is safe...man or woman.
 

pokerus

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Well doesn't it depend on what is being said to you. There's a difference between compliments and harassment.
 

ManlyBanisters

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ummm it was a suggestion for the OP... and you can take your rage elsewhere. I've never said or done anything for you to come at me like this.

Rage?

That's a big word for a capslock and a little smilie - feeling a tad defensive, are we? :rolleyes:

Look, you make it worse when you tell someone (or 'suggest' to someone) that he/she should feel complimented by something that feels uncomfortable. It may suggest to that person, the person you are telling to take a compliment, that he/she is somehow deficient for now feeling that way.
 

OCMuscleJock

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capslock? really?

I think, and it IS my opinion, that people really should learn the difference between harassment and a compliment. IF something makes a person uncomfortable, they need to express that so the problem stops. A majority of people would LOVE to hear that they look good or someone finds them attractive. What some people see as a problem others see as a confidence boost.

For the record, you assume to have some control on these boards to begin to tell someone what they "DARE". I dunno..but it seems to me you did the same thing that I did by telling me what I dare to do.

I'm not defensive, but more surprised you'd respond as you did...

He posted to get opinions or a response...that is what he got.

Rage?

That's a big word for a capslock and a little smilie - feeling a tad defensive, are we? :rolleyes:

Look, you make it worse when you tell someone (or 'suggest' to someone) that he/she should feel complimented by something that feels uncomfortable. It may suggest to that person, the person you are telling to take a compliment, that he/she is somehow deficient for now feeling that way.
 

pokerus

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Women's Issues is always so rage filled.

Does that make me terrible that I am intrigued by these conversations because they have such an argumentative side?
 

dolfette

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no, i shouldn't take it as a compliment.
i should take it as some knuckle dragging mouth breather acting as though each arse-in-jeans he sees is the first.
giving imbeciles boners is no ego boost in my world.
 

VernalTiger

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I've always found that the worst situations are the ones involving men that are significantly older than me. This shit started when I was barely 13, before I even needed a bra. Guys old enough to be a father or even grandfather will stare at young women with no compunction. It always horrifies me to think that these men have daughters, nieces, grand-daughters (and all the friends, sporting events and dance recitals that go with it) that they're potentially looking at in the same way.
 

Kotchanski

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Without putting words in ManlyBs mouth, I have to agree with her and add:

The information provided in the OP suggested comments, nothing more, nothing less... we've no idea what comments specifically, what nature they took, what language was used or another else that could lead us into a position of knowing how we'd each take the comments in question.

To come running into the thread and post "Aww, I like them, they make me feel good, so flattered" or words to that extent does a grand total, at best, of fuck all for your plight to rid the site of sexism.

Thread one: I want to get rid of the sexist assholes on the site
Thread two: Let's give them all a green light by telling them it's always a compliment when they make comments, no matter what those comments may be, or how they're said.

And yes, I'm pissed, and no I don't feel fucking bad about it.

No matter what I may have said about my personal views on sexism, how I take it when it is directed at myself, I want to make a fucking change on this site, for the better, for the women here who have expressed their disappointment with how things are currently, and their desire for change.

I mean for the love of whatever you believe in, don't go fucking demanding things from the membership and mod team alike in one breath and encouraging it the fucking next.
 

VernalTiger

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No matter what I may have said about my personal views on sexism, how I take it when it is directed at myself, I want to make a fucking change on this site, for the better, for the women here who have expressed their disappointment with how things are currently, and their desire for change.

Thank you, Aconitum.
 

Pompeynate

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get harassed by often in the middle of the street (or wherever) by men. Often times, when I go out, I get crude comments thrown my way by homosexuals. It's not necessarily offending, but it makes me feel uncomfortable (not because I am homophobic, it's just extremely awkward). So yes, my sympathies go to those of you who deal with that petty shit on a day-to-day basis.

Yet you are happy for homosexual men to comment on how great your cock is & how hot you are on here?? Alrighty then...
 

dolfette

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Yet you are happy for homosexual men to comment on how great your cock is & how hot you are on here?? Alrighty then...
you're a bit special if you can't see a difference between a) a line of text you can choose to read when you're in the mood, and b) comments made out loud and uninvited in public places.

the OP wasn't dissing homosexuality.
he was dissing crass idiots with no manners.
 

Pompeynate

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There is a huge difference between putting up images on a site that provides the ability to leave comments, and popping down to the shops.

But surely if you were that sensitive to crude/sexual comments from strangers you wouldn't put naked photos on a website where you will receive crude/sexual comments from men & women. But that's just my opinion...

you're a bit special if you can't see a difference between a) a line of text you can choose to read when you're in the mood, and b) comments made out loud and uninvited in public places.

the OP wasn't dissing homosexuality.
he was dissing crass idiots with no manners.

And you are a bit special if you can't see the hypocrisy/double standards of someone disliking crude/sexual comments made towards themselves by strangers, then they put up naked photos of themselves to get crude/sexual comments off strangers...

It of course depends on how far some of these guys go with him & what exactly they say, but I'm sure some comments wouldn't be too dissimilar to the comments he receives on his photos...
 

Kotchanski

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But surely if you were that sensitive to crude/sexual comments from strangers you wouldn't put naked photos on a website where you will receive crude/sexual comments from men & women. But that's just my opinion...



And you are a bit special if you can't see the hypocrisy/double standards of someone disliking crude/sexual comments made towards themselves by strangers, then they put up naked photos of themselves to get crude/sexual comments off strangers...

It of course depends on how far some of these guys go with him & what exactly they say, but I'm sure some comments wouldn't be too dissimilar to the comments he receives on his photos...

Just your opinion maybe, but your opinion is wrong.

In one situation, he is ASKING for comments of a sexual nature. The mere act of uploading the images to an area that allows for comments to be made implies that comments are welcome. Else he'd have uploaded them to a private album where only those he selects as friends can view/comment, or uploaded them elsewhere, where he can provide the link/password to only those he wishes.

In the other situation, he's not soliciting any form of comment, he's out shopping, getting the milk in, popping to a friends house and the likes.

It isn't about being sensitive to comments from strangers, it's about people assuming they have the right to make comments when none are solicited.
 

EllieP

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I know the difference between flattery and just plain rudeness. I have other flatter me, and I politely accept and try to say something nice to them. If there is a goal to their flattery I never acknowledge it and go about my business. The boys are usually somewhat transparent in their goals, but their flattery seems genuine. If I'm in the mood I will tease for a bit, but never when I'm alone.