My time at LPSG

Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by Shit Blimp, Mar 6, 2008.

  1. Shit Blimp

    Shit Blimp New Member

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    I wandered here during a pretty rough and lonely patch in my life.

    It was a few months in to what would become about a two year long dry spell in my dating and love life. I had only had two girlfriends up to that point and had not long before broken up with the second one and moved back home to live with my parents, feeling somewhat dejected and disillusioned with life and love. Both were long relationships and I didn't have much dating experience at all to speak of, though I was already older at that point than most people are when they finish college.

    I was in the final stages of the arduous and disconcerting process of losing my faith, my ideals shattered and my worldview disintegrating, wandering around in a haze of moral ambiguity and ontological angst. My aspirations for life after high school had not even come close to materializing, I was a college drop out, I was working a job I didn't particularly like. Blah blah blah this is getting boring.

    One of my best friends directed me to this website, purely for the comedic value of it, so the both of us could poke fun at its marvelous absurdity in a way that you can't anymore after you've been here too long and become inured to it. He also joked that I should try to find and fuck some size queens on the site because he was aware of my generous endowment. We both thought this would be funny if I tried, so I did.

    I picked out a name that I thought was appropriately absurd, since I was still in the mindset of poking fun at this ridiculous concept for a website. I looked around and saw lots of handles such as "longdong," "twofister," "DoubleMeatWhopper" and so on... and picked something similar with my own twist on it. Part joke, part insult, part tongue-in-cheek, part culture reference.

    My first post actually was asking for support. Because I had a big dick but it had never done anything especially good for me, in spite of the stereotype that they are wonderful for boosting confidence and improving your sex life and getting you women. My friend and I read over some of the responses together and had a laugh about it. But no offers from size queens.

    A few months later, I was still in the same slump. So I came back to the site looking for ass again, found that the site had gone down and all the old posts had been lost, so I made a similar post again. Chuckled again about some of the responses. Still didn't find any real size queens. But this time I stuck around and posted a few more responses.

    I took a three month hiatus. I came back and posted some more. I gained a reputation as a sensitive nice guy, intelligent, introspective, well-spoken and articulate, compassionate. Back then there weren't really any heated debates. At least none that lasted very long. The site was smaller, there was a greater sense of community, it was a closer knit group of folks and we didn't step on each others' toes as much. Most of the topics were about penises, sex, intimacy and relationships. In fact I think the first heated debate I got into, a thread that was eventually locked on the topic of "Black Cock," led to me taking a leave of absence for a full year. I didn't really like the mood of the thread and it turned me off on the site for that long.

    But that was after I met and started communicating with someone from here. Maybe my first real size queen? Though she wasn't exactly what I had pictured or expected when I came to the site looking for that. She was an older woman, mature, seemingly sophisticated, surprisingly conservative, articulate, educated, model-good-looks in the photos she sent me.

    Even though I left the site she and I continued talking online and on the telephone fairly frequently. I was really unsure at that point in my life that I wanted to get into another serious relationship. I was only at LPSG looking to be used for my big cock, and had that history of long failed relationships before I was trying to get away from after all. The age difference, too, seemed like it was going to be an issue. But she was making me rethink all of that. She told me she loved me.

    We made plans to meet, but she canceled on me at the last minute. After that, we talked about meeting, but plans never materialized. We continued talking about it, but I grew less and less certain that it would ever actually happen. I had a short chaotic relationship with another girl... twisted and unrelated story... but this one I knew from here was still on my mind frequently. Enough that I believe she even compromised a different relationship that I had, even though I still had yet to meet this woman from LPSG.

    I returned to the site again approximately a year after I left. Had to reregister again. I came back primarily to look up contact information for someone else that I had previously been in contact with through the site. But while I was digging through the new threads I uncovered one with a story that this woman I was involved with was a fraud. That was a nice firm punch in the gut. Not just being lied to but also finding out through a thread on this site, because she had revealed herself to others before revealing herself to me. I became a lot more cynical about trusting people online after that.
     
  2. Shit Blimp

    Shit Blimp New Member

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    But for whatever reason, I also started posting again. The site was a bit different. More members. A greater variety of topics. Not quite as nauseatingly smug and self-congratulatory. I started getting involved in some of the more political and philosophical debates. That kept me coming back for more.

    I became a regular and well-respected poster, appreciated for my insight and temperance, and for the irony of the extreme braggadocio in my handle juxtaposed against my real life modesty. I had a few more sexual experiences to talk about under my belt now, as well, as I had entered my sexual renaissance in the interim during which I wasn't visiting the site. That all started with an at-time depressing, though in the end confidence-boosting trip for me overseas. but.. that's neither here nor there. My personality had changed. I wasn't quite the droopy (yet loveable) sadsack that I was before. I had some newfound confidence. That was bolstered even further after I finally (with much prodding) posted a few pics here and developed quite a fanbase, male and female. I was one of the popular kids.

    Posting at that time was enjoyable. I came back because people appreciated my posts, my insight, and my sense of humor, and I got along well with almost everybody... though I had my run-ins with a few.

    The site was experiencing growing pains. Particularly after repeated airings of a program on the BBC that featured the site. We had a flood of new members, greater in number and thicker in the head than most of the ones the site had experienced before. Lots of trolls. Lots of homophobes. Lots of looky-loos and passerbys. Lots of America-bashing international members who came here apparently looking for a fight.

    The sense of community was starting to unravel a bit. But I still enjoyed the debates. That was what kept me coming back before, and part of the reason I continued to come. Though a greater reason at this point was the friendships that I had forged. I had pretty good rapport with a number of regular members.

    I even met one of them. My first real size queen, and it only took me a few years into my time here to meet her. But, much like the first woman that I became involved with on the site, this new one was not at all like what I was expecting to find when my friend first dared me to create a profile. She was also mature, sophisticated, and intelligent. Unlike the first one though, this one wasn't a fraud. We met and it was great and I'm still glad that we did.

    I met a couple more people from the site. The relationships that I had here seemed to be growing more solid all the time. That's what kept me coming back as the tenor of the site and communal quality of it continued to change. Most notably during the great penis schism of '07. (It was '07, right? maybe early '08) A few of those posters that I had had run-ins with before got themselves banned. A couple others that were my friends now had me on their shit lists. Lots of people were angry and frustrated.

    We lost a ton of good members. Post quality was really pitifully low for a while. My interest waxed and waned. I had a lot of other things going on in my life, so I would pop back in occasionally. Again, mostly for those relationships that I had forged. The ones that hadn't been undone by all the stupid drama.

    Then around Christmas something else happened that made me feel betrayed by many of those I thought I was closest to here. I started to question if I had allowed myself to be deceived again into believing that something was there when it really wasn't. Believing a relationship, or relationships, were stronger than they actually were.

    I took another hiatus. The only reason I was coming back anymore was because of my friendships here. So... if that was in doubt... what was the point, really? The site was being overrun by bigots and trolls and pissants anyway. I eventually came back, but it seemed like all I was coming back for was to argue. My personality had changed again here. More cynical. More bitter. Less patient with the stupids. I had completely given up on meeting women here after the Miss_Valentine fiasco so I wasn't coming here for that anymore. Though I did meet a nice Thai girl... but.. ahem.

    Wasn't interested in the friendships. Wasn't interested in the debates. Wasn't interested in finding pussy. Was growing tired of the same threads over and over again, only with dumber posts each time around. and when you start feeling that cynical about a place it becomes toxic. It affects everyone who posts around you, and they start projecting that cynicism back at you. Baiting you at every turn, and more often than not I'd bite. I just didn't care anymore. Even a couple friends who hadn't already turned their back on me started to be a little nasty. Understandable, I guess.

    So what was I coming for now? If I had grown tired of the arguments. I think only one answer remains: to waste time. I come here to piss away time. Hours and hours of it. When I have something important to do that I'm procrastinating on, I notice that the amount of time I spend here goes up about 1000%. This site for me has become the equivalent of minesweeper.
     
  3. gjorg

    Gold Member

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    Blah-Blah
     
  4. B_Jennuine73

    B_Jennuine73 New Member

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    Hmmm, I am wondering what type of response to give. Your post was very well written and articulate.

    Welcome again, fellow time waster.
     
  5. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Leaving for a while then coming back again does help some but we must recognize that nothing stays the same. Everything has extremes as the pendulum swings from one side to the other so if we dislike the direction things are taking we should wisely remember that it's just temporary and things will turn around again.
     
  6. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    I'm really curious who this person is? Wondering if I'd known them... very well written posts. What a pleasant change.
     
  7. Skull Mason

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  8. B_Nick4444

    B_Nick4444 New Member

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    ... ask not for whom the bell tolls ..
     
  9. dannymawg

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  10. B_Mademoiselle Rouge

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    You dork! I didnt even get to give you my new yahoo name either! We were going to have a scat party with Ann Coulter remember???
     
  11. D_Jurgen Klitgaard

    D_Jurgen Klitgaard Account Disabled

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    Wow, 89 years old.
     
  12. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    I'm not sure that's the case here Pecker, not at all.
     
  13. rexcasual

    rexcasual Member

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    I suggest the mods lock this thread immediately.

    If this kind of honest self-appraisal catches on with the rest of the time wasters here, the place will clear out. Maybe the viral urge to take back one's life will become unstoppable, bankrupting the interweb itself, and finally bringing down the world economy.

    Do your duty. :cool:
     
  14. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    I'll miss you R. The time's right. Just wish you hadn't burned the bridge. I've always counted you among my friends here. Feel free to stay in contact with me.

    :wavey:
     
  15. vince

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    I can understand where he is coming from. LPSG can be a huge time pit. I have met some cool people here and enjoyed much of the discussions. But I basically wasted last summer with the time I spent here. Much of the time I would usually have spent with friends was lost to being online. During the blow-out over trolls and how ineffectively the site dealt with them, which resulted in a bunch of us getting banned, I decided to cut back on the time I spend here. Not that I am a high profile member or anything. I'm more of a reader than a poster, but it still consumes too much time

    I am pretty much ignoring the trolls now. The thing I really don't like is how some of the more intelligent posters routinely engage in argumentum ad hominem debating tactics. IMO personal attacks on your opponent are an admission of intellectual bankruptcy. I have been guilty of it too. But some folks here make a specialty of it and I find it to be boring and not worthy of my time.

    To the OP, (it's not hard to figure who he is), you are going to be missed.
    I wish I could have got to know you better. Sorry you burned out man. But I understand completely.
     
  16. ActionBuddy

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    Well spoken... most of you. Shall we create a "Kinder and Gentler" LPSG?
     
  17. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

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    This was totally in error.
     
  18. SwingDriver

    SwingDriver New Member

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    You gotta do what you gotta do.
     
  19. Nrets

    Nrets Member

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    You and me both, buddy.
    I know you are banned now, and that's a shame. Reading these long posts reminded me of the rise and fall of my favorite musician, Kurt Cobain. I remember you saying you thought astrology is BS, but I have to wonder if you are a pisces, Ryan
    Well, not like I am going to get an answer. Maybe I'll go browse thorugh some old threads now.

    Peace, brother
     
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