My wife's fantasy.

[B_Think_Kink]

Think Kink, my response wasn't vicious, my experience is just different from the Stockholm syndrome you mentioned. I always thought that Stockholm syndrome only appeared in situations like kidnapping and such. I know several women who were abused as a child, but none of them learned to love the abuse.

For what it's worth: English is not my native language, it would be easier for me to nuance things if it was.

I'm sorry, I detected a harshness in your response that I didn't think was fair.

 

[D_Ivana Dickenside]

I have a hard time understanding the rape fantasy.

me too. i've read other comments and still don't comprehend the "forceful" meaning behind it. i guess the rape fantasy is a bit too scary for me--controlled environment or not.

 

[Nala]

I'm sorry, I detected a harshness in your response that I didn't think was fair.

Thank you, it's okay. It's not my intention to flame or be rude, thanks for letting me know, I'll keep that in mind while writing my replies.

 

[goodwood]

My ex often mentioned this same fantasy - that i would forcefully and aggressively take her when she was not expecting. In fact she asked me to surprise her by doing this. So one day as she passed through the study, i got up from my desk, grabbed her, undid her pants and started pounding her up against the wall, then carried her upstairs, threw her on the bed and fucked her like crazy and she LOVED it. She said it was really hot. And honestly, it was, i mean we loved each other very much and it was fun to do something unexpected. So I can understand why some women would have this fantasty and want it actualized with a partner they love and trust.

 

[missbec]

I absolutely LOVE having no control in this particular situation. As stated before, its all about the power ratio.

However, its nice when some one else does the work... sometimes...

-becky

 

[B_frank969]

thank you for the responses. its deffinitely all about role play

 

[Honey123]

I get what you are saying, Nala, but I still differentiate between the two things. For me the definition of rape is be forced into having sex when you do not want to. It's the 'not wanting to' bit I can't get past. I can fantasise about saying no and having my mind changed, I can fantasise a situation where consent is not requested, and so on - but I cannot find actual rape (where consent is withheld throughout the act) a turn on, not on any level.

If the fantasies I do have are what other women call a rape fantasy well then I guess I do - but that's not what I call rape. Sex is all about wanting for me - if I want my lover to control it it isn't about him taking it, it is about me giving it. He and I both know that.

And when I fantasise I know that. The thought of anyone (male or female) being made to have sex when they do not want to turns my stomach.

I'm with you dear in most of what you said, but I don't have any desire whatsoever to be restrained or forced sexually.

Rape is an act of violence sexually directed to and forced upon a weaker person. I find nothing sexy or enjoyable about that.

 

[ManlyBanisters]

I'm with you dear in most of what you said, but I don't have any desire whatsoever to be restrained or forced sexually.

Some people do, some don't - it all good :smile:

Rape is an act of violence sexually directed to and forced upon a weaker person. I find nothing sexy or enjoyable about that.

Ek-fucking-zactly!

 

[meerin]

I think it's semantics. Most people who fantasize about rape fantasize about it being wanted- which makes it not rape. More like consensual non-consent. But rape fantasy has invaded the language and become popular so it's the common term.
"Mmmmm consensual non-consent fantasy" just doesn't roll of the tongue. Neither does "I'm going to consesnually non-consent you". :tongue:

 

[jerreo]

My woman and I combine our turn-ons. I like semi public sex but she is too hesitant. She likes "rape" scenarios occassionally. So on an innocent date night I find a spot not likely to be discovered and when she refuses I "force" her. We usually fuck again when we get home.

 

[Phil Ayesho]

I have a hard time understanding the rape fantasy.

I do have fantasies that involve forceful sex, unexpected penetration and things of that nature but I can't fantasise that the sex is unwanted as it happens. I can't fantasise about something being done to me* against my will. Yes, I can understand it being beyond my control - but that is a different thing.

* or whoever - I don't always fantasise in the first person. I wonder is that common.. hmm, I feel a thread coming on.

I think the rape fantasy is exactly the same thing... being out of control... I just think most women who have rape fantasies are not able to imagine being out of control as NOT being rape.

That is... I think it take a certain level of intellectual sophistication to realize that forcible, out of control sex, can be separated from the idea of sex against one's will.

 

[Wish-4-8]

Actually, it is a more common fantasy for women then most people think. The problem is that the topic is disgusting and too taboo to talk about.

From what I have read, its the ultimate in being ravished and "taken". There is a submissive quality about it that some women find appealing. But a Fantasy is just that, fantasy. No women, I dont think, really wants to be raped or sexually assulted in the true-est sense of the word.

If you are into that, I would suggest a safeword. That way she can put on the brakes if it gets too real. As a male, i dont get off on the fantasy of raping a women, or even being raped by a beautiful woman. But I will devour her like a caveman.

 

[EL_Duderino]

I used to have a fuck buddy who used to like a slight rape fantasy. she would beg me to stop and all and i would get a little rougher than usual but never hitting seriously or anything like that. she used to just like the idea of me taking what i wanted, but of course I'm already pretty dominant so it wasn't that big a of a reach for me. She used to describe it as a rape fantasy but i don't really think it was.

 

[sxy_vince]

I'm sorry, I detected a harshness in your response that I didn't think was fair.

Thank you, it's okay. It's not my intention to flame or be rude, thanks for letting me know, I'll keep that in mind while writing my replies.

Before I give my thoughts, I wanted to say, Think Kink, I thought it was really sweet of you to make a comment when you saw a response to someone else that could be percieved as unfair. And its great that Nala and you both had the maturity to resolve the miscommunication constructively, and that Nala never intended to flame! I do find a lot of the comments on lpsg to be meanspirited so its pleasing to see such maturity from you both.

My thoughts are like this: there are two aspects to rape scenario:
1. The man feels overwhelming lust to "take" the woman
2. The woman does not consent to this act

I suspect that a lot of women find the first component a turn-on. They like the idea that a man is so overwhelmed by lust for them that he can't hold himself back. They also like the idea of a man having his way with them.

However, virtually all women find the second component distressing.

Hence, the appeal of the "rape fantasy" is that it allows them to entertain the first component while the second component becomes irrelvant.

p.s. I think there may be an exception if women feel that consenting to sex is "wrong", in which case even the second component is appealing because it gives them an excuse to enjoy sex.

Just my thoughts - Feedback welcome - Anyone agree or disagree?

 

[poizen-ivy]

It's desire.
To be desired so much they want you if you're ready or not.

I play out pretend rape fantasies with my fb.
He likes being dominant and I like taking it. Both parties happy.

We have a safe word in case one of us is uncomfortable, but that's yet to be used.

 

[englandgirl]

helloyou123 its just a fantasy u idiot

 

[MissPretty]

I have done this before, although i would't really consider it a "rape fantasy" so much as a power fantasy. Being raped does not excite me, although the thought of forced sex with a powerful man is exciting. Previous male partners have brought this idea up, although some of these men seem nervous when they are actually given control. :frown1: I don't know...that's just my experience.

 

[croupier87]

How about you really give her what she wants. Not a role play like you did but actually try to have forced sex when she's cooking or doing something important. She might either really like it or you get slapped.

 

[Amber1]

ok, i just found out the other day that my wife fantasizes about being raped. I had her handcuff and on her stomache, i was holding her down and telling her she can"t stop me, She said go ahead and rape me. I asked her if she like the thougthof being raped and she said yes.

So how many or is it common that you women fantasize about being raped?

Thanks,
Frank

I have this fantasy but its a bit different to your wifes.

With the guy I would be saying no.....so that IS more 'forceful.'

However it always revolves around guys I have a lot of chemistry with not some random stranger. So in that sense is it rape???

I don't know!! Whatever it is it is very aggressive and highly charged. And at some point within this fantasy I do start to enjoy it and show it....So is that rape?? Probably not...strictly speakin.

I've never roleplayed it with a partner either. But I intend to. :smile:

 

[poizen-ivy]

How about you really give her what she wants. Not a role play like you did but actually try to have forced sex when she's cooking or doing something important. She might either really like it or you get slapped.

Yep exactly. Like making dinner, vacuuming or something like doing the laundry etc.

I left my door open once as I knew there might be a chance he'd drop over, I was just about to sit down to eat and I felt this hard body behind me, he was forceful, powerful and strong. I loved it.

OOO and there was nothing said. No words at all. He also wouldn't let me look at his face till we were done.

That's how it's done boys :wink: