Mystery penis

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by tritonal, Mar 1, 2007.

  1. tritonal

    tritonal Member

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    So, I met this guy, M, online a month or two ago. He was funny, loved being a jerk on the internet, and he was pretty hot (in an urban lumberjack sort of way.) After meeting him for some tea, I determined that he wasn't an internet murderer, so I set him up with my best friend. They went out a couple of times, and then my best friend dumped M because he got baked lays goo all over his wiimote. We didn't want M to go to waste, however, so my best friend set him up with another of our mutual friends. They went out a couple of times, and then M stopped calling him. No biggie.

    Here's the problem. Both of my friends have said that M has a gargantuan penis. They way they speak of it in hushed whisphers, as if it were an ancient secret, has filled me with an almost painful curiosity. I need to see this legendary penis, or the mystery will surely drive me mad. Now, my boyfriend has already said that he doesn't find M attractive, so seducing him into a threesome isn't an option. Here are the plans I've come up with so far.

    1: Sneak a hidden X-10 camera into M's room to record a video of him taking a shower.
    Problems: Hidden X-10 cameras cost money, which is in short supply for me right now. Also, requires more sneaking than I am comfortable with.

    2: Learn astral projection and spy on M as a spooky ghost.
    Problems: Hooey and flim-flam

    3: Convince another friend/passer-by to have sex with M. (Shouldn't be too hard; he seems to enjoy having sex with people I know.) Make sure they take pictures, then run away. Possibly convince them with baked goods.
    Problems: I don't have any friends. =(

    Does anyone else have any more ideas for schemes? The more hare-brained, the better!
     
  2. HungUKProfessional

    HungUKProfessional Active Member

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    You could ask this guy if you could see it...
     
  3. ericbear

    Gold Member

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    Indeed, someone asked me that in the kitchen at a party last Saturday night. I was quite happy to pull it out.
     
  4. glenroebuck

    glenroebuck New Member

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    give me his number I will tell you if it is true
     
  5. reallyhot

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    Now you've got me curious...
    Definately post a pic when you get it!
     
  6. SpoiledPrincess

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    I don't want to get off the subject but what are baked lays goo and what is a wiimote?
     
  7. shanehall

    shanehall New Member

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    Baked lays GOO is the mess you get on your fingers when eating this type of baked potato chip.
    The WII remote is a remote control unit for a 3 dimensional on television interaction gaming system.

    Kindly,
    Shane
     
  8. SpoiledPrincess

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  9. Mr. Snakey

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    Wasn't this a board game back in the late 60's? Oh no im sorry that was Mystery Date...........:cool:
     
  10. rubberwilli

    rubberwilli Member

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    If I still had family in Flint I'd definately take a hit for you to help solve this issue, but alas I don't have relatives there anymore.

    I'd say just ask him

    OR

    Tell him about LPSG and we'll all get to see when he joins up!
     
  11. allandonn

    allandonn New Member

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    wow.. i read that differently. I thought he got baked.. then lays goo on the remote. That sounds much worse than 'chip fingers'.
     
  12. headbang8

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    "Goo on the wiimote" seems like a fairly innocuous fault. If I sacked every friend who spilled red wine on my couch I'd be a lonely man.

    Onto the subject: Do you need to see this dick more than you need your boyfriend? I think you know the answer.
     
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