Need advice: healthy nudity or creepy exhibitionist?

[helgaleena]

Warning-- jailbait! proceed with extreeeeeeeeme caution, friendship first!

 

[phallic intrigue]

Yes, I'm being cautious. But like I said, even if he does want something sexual (and it's just as likely right now that he doesn't), it won't be reciprocated. Even if he was my age, I just couldn't see myself being into him that way. Looks aren't everything.

 

[PornForPatric]

I was in a similar situation with a fellow who was 17 at the time. I'd seen him off an on since he was 15. I figured out he was now 17 and exploring his sexuality. Like you, I tried to be an older brother figure to him & sort of help him out. Nothing sexual, just help him to at least get into a situation where he could meet guys close to his age to hit on instead of me (which is what he did constantly to my great annoyance). I figured, better me, who wasn't going to screw him, than some other guy who'd be more interested in fucking him than helping him develop as a person.

A year later and he's sorted it all out (likes guys and the rare girl if it is an MMF situation). We meet up for coffee every now and then.

I think it is good to sort of have someone when you're that age, not to explain every last thing to you, but to at least smooth out some of the bumpier parts of coming out.

 

[phallic intrigue]

I recently got a PM asking for an update, so I'll go ahead and post one now. Basically, things kind of worked themselves out. He did wind up going with me to work out, and we both hit the showers when we were done. Like I said, they're open showers, so I saw him again and he finally saw me. We stood next to each other, and I caught him looking at me several times. It didn't matter to me, because at least this was a public non-sexual situation to be naked. (Thanks again to whoever suggested the gym and shower idea. Good call.) He didn't say anything while we were naked, but he commented about my girth when I was driving him home. (I have to admit, I think he's an inch or so longer than me flaccid. But I'm definitely thicker.) We talked about length vs. girth, age and growth, etc for a while, and then we moved on. It was strangely anticlimactic.

Looking back on the day I brought the TV over, I'm pretty sure that's what this whole thing was about. He has no dad, no brothers, and I think maybe a couple male cousins that he never sees. He also said none of the guys at his school use the showers, and his guy friends think it's "gay" if another guy sees you naked. This is a kid who has practically never seen another dick in person. So it makes sense that he would do some weird shit to try to figure out if he's normal or answer whatever questions were in his head regarding his body.

He wants to keep working out with me, so we're planning to go together a couple times a week. Of course we'll still shower and stuff. But I don't really think it's about dicks or nudity anymore. I think it's just a time to hang out and talk a little bit about whatever. Body issues are definitely one issue, but I think he may have some confusion about his sexuality, among other things. And that's fine. Now that we're more comfortable with each other, I'll just wait for him to guide our discussions and talk to me about stuff when he's ready. It's been for good for me to do something other than worry about myself, and I'd like to think this will be good for him too.

Anyway, thanks for everyone's advice. I think this might be the first time I've had success with advice from an internet forum. So that's cool.

 

[MarkLondon]

I'm glad it's worked out well. Thanks for letting us know.

 

[Snozzle]

That was an excellent thread. Good advice, well taken, and a possible faux pas avoided. Vive les Internets!

 

[JohnDoeXXXm]

been there before. You're welcome

 

[trumasseur]

teens test the parameters of their existence....didn't we all in some way or another? Part of natural development. The awareness of one's physicality obviously has more potential to be communicated in today's world and more so in the future. People need to be more comfortable in their own "skin" as well as take better care of such. It sounded like he was "under control" you didn't mention if he was sporting a hard-on or anything. We don't help when we try to put the old rules of prior generations on the rapidly evolving present and future.

 

[D_Ukraine_Muhdik]

he probably was just doing what he thought was okay, given the fact it was just u and him in the house. As to whether he wanted u to join im and strip, who knows. I say ignore it just act natural, he's comfortable in his own skin, as you should be.

 

[D_CountVonBhigBohner]

I'm sure he figured out how to handle it back in 2009 when he posted this thread.

he probably was just doing what he thought was okay, given the fact it was just u and him in the house. As to whether he wanted u to join im and strip, who knows. I say ignore it just act natural, he's comfortable in his own skin, as you should be.