Need help in understanding the male mind ...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by k9sport, Jan 23, 2007.

  1. k9sport

    k9sport New Member

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    I need some help in understanding the male point of view …

    I am a (female) dog trainer, mostly for active duty police dogs, personal protection dogs and sport dogs. This includes training them to bite and many times I am the person they bite during a training session. This means I have to wear special protective equipment, like quilted leather scratch pants, bite suits, neoprene gauntlets, etc. The equipment is heavy and restricts movement so I can’t arrive at the job already “dressed” and I also have to change equipment during a training session depending on the skill level of the dog I am working. The training is done at various outdoor training facilities that do not have niceties like dressing rooms or bathrooms. I always change on the field, this usually involves stripping down to a sports bra and gym shorts. I don’t just start stripping in front of the training crowd. I step a few yards away to my truck (where my equipment is) and undress/dress standing outside of the truck. Everyone I know who does this kind of work does the same thing. I should also mention that it’s mostly males who do this kind of work, and most of the clients who handle the dogs are males.

    The clients don’t have a problem with this; however every boyfriend I have ever had has had an issue with it. Eventually the BF is curious about what I do, wants to come to a training session to watch, and then is aghast when he sees this. Specifically, they are upset that I “get dressed in public” (although one particular BF was upset by seeing me work the dogs as well).

    Help me understand … if your girlfriend/significant other had to do this, why would it upset you (if in fact it would)? I’m not “flashing my tits” or trying to be provocative, it’s just part of my work, so I truly do not understand.

    K
     
  2. thirdlegmeat

    thirdlegmeat Member

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    I would personally have no problem with your situation if I was your boyfriend. However, I'm notoriously non-jealous--almost to a fault. Still, I think that most confident guys wouldn't have a problem.

    We'll see what the other LPSG men say. :biggrin1:
     
  3. Whopper-lee

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    Sounds to me the B/F needs more training than the dogs you're training...
    is it worth your time to do both:confused:
    :cool: job! Guess this wasn't much help... hope you can better replies than mine.

    Be Safe, Be Careful, & Enjoy!
    Whooper-lee:smile:
     
  4. Principessa

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    IMHO, this occurs because when you date a guy he likes to think that certain parts of you are for his eyes only. I don't mean to imply that men feel like they own us. However, like us men need to feel special. So if you walk around the house in your underwear and he is cool with that. Then he sees you at work in a sports bra (most unsexy) and boxer shorts, or leggings or whatever and he gets freaked out.
    Thats a normal reaction somewhat akin to jealousy for lackof a better term.

    For instance:
    Some porn stars will only have anal sex with their boyfriends and NEVER on camera.

    I used to model in bridal shows in college. My beau was okay with that. Afterall, you can't get much more covered than a formal wedding gown.

    Unfortunately he came to one of the few shows in which I had to model honeymoon lingerie. OMFG! Talk about a long ride home. He flipped out. It's not like I was wearing pasties or even a thong. Just tap pants w/camisole, a teddy, and then a shortie peignoir with pantyhose and high heels.

    My point, and I do have one, you have to save something special for your guy and let him know it's just for him.
     

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  5. endofsummer

    endofsummer New Member

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    "Help me understand" Hi K9SPORT, I think you misunderstand the boyfriends reaction. I think you put yourself in danger to some guy that might totally mis-read your behavior and think you were advertising. I think the friends reaction is concern for your safety more than insecurity. There has got to be a better way to change equipment.
     
  6. B_big dirigible

    B_big dirigible New Member

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    As recounted here it doesn't sound like anything to get excited about.

    But it also sounds like one of those stories with two sides, and we've only heard one. Since every boyfriend's reaction has been the same (even if the sum total of boyfriends is a small number, like two), I'd suspect the other side of the story might put a different slant on things.
     
  7. Yorkie

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    There is no generic ''male point of view'' on this.Some guys are possesive and jealous,some aren't.Personally I would have no problem with what you do. :cool:
     
  8. Gillette

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    Where have all the secure men gone?

    I'd start bringing this up on first dates just to get the twits off the radar.
    No sense getting attached to someone who will flip over something so minor.

    I can see a guy being upset about this if you were wearing a red lace thong and matching peek-a-boo bra but a sports bra and gym shorts?
    Would he care to forbid you to jog as well?

    As to the safety aspect, sure, yes, being partially disrobed could put you in a vulnerable position. But I'd have to guess that an event surrounded by personal protection dogs, police dogs and quite likely policemen would not be a sexual predators preferred hunting grounds.

    P.S. Just noticed your join date. Welcome to the site!
     
  9. Love-it

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    I can't imagine why a man would be upset by your changing routine, I doubt that this would even bother your father and he is likely to be more protective than any other male you are likely to meet. Is there a particular kind of man that you are attracted to that exhibits these behaviors? Maybe you should be dating more mature men.
     
  10. Matthew

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    "Men read maps better because only the male mind could conceive of one inch equalling a hundred miles" - Roseanne Barr
     
  11. k9sport

    k9sport New Member

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    Thanks for recognizing this point. I could not be in a safer environment, in addition to what you have pointed out, my own (trained) dog is always with me when I work - he would not let anyone touch me in a violent manner.

    K
     
  12. k9sport

    k9sport New Member

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    :confused: I'm not sure I understand, do you mean the BF's side of the story?

    K
     
  13. k9sport

    k9sport New Member

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    njqt466 - I love the stupid boy factory jpeg - mind if I steal it?

    K
     
  14. railfan69

    railfan69 Member

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    well all i can say is insecure boyfriends
     
  15. socoken

    socoken New Member

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    It probably means you are too attractive for the guys you tend to date, or you just look REALLY good in a sports bra and shorts. ;)
     
  16. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    It wouldn't bother me at all.

    If it did, it would be because I was an insecure jealous and controlling twat who was more comfortable thinking of you as property than a person.

    As a former insecure twat, I speak from experience.
     
  17. dolf250

    dolf250 New Member

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    I will just echo what has already been said; it is a security issue for your BF and not your issue (aside from the fact that it affects your relationship.) There is not a whole lot you can do about it, aside from buy a camper for the back of your truck. And lets face it- that is an awfully complex and expensive solution to what should be a non-issue in the first place.

    You say that it is not just the one boyfriend who has an issue with it, but rather that it has been an issue a number of times. Some women just don't seem to have any luck in who they attract. Sorry I cannot offer you any solutions because it is not an issue with you, but feel free to send your future boyfriends here for advice.

    I just took a peek at your gallery. You look very attractive and a love of old cars? I can offer you one other solution; come up North and marry me.
     
  18. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    I have known some women in the past who seem to go only for the same type of men whom this would bother. So maybe the pattern of behavior in her boyfriends does suggest some issue in mate selection.
     
  19. MattBrick

    MattBrick Member

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    Wow, I wish my girlfriend was a sexy girl dog trainer :)

    Seriously, I liked the story for some reason, lol

    Here is something to think about. Some times we start fights with you for no reason. At least the reason doesn't have to do with what we are fighting about.

    A good thing to do, is make sure you let him know that he is important to you, and the HE is the one you like. When a girl I'm with has made a spectacle of herself, it's not so much, that I've been jealous. It's more like, why doesn't she do that for me? Does that make any sense?



    ******************************************************
    Hey, checking out a bunch of guys online with big penises would probably not make your boyfriend less jealous by the way......
     
  20. BobLeeSwagger

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    I don't think this is a matter of understanding the male mind. It's a matter of you dating possessive guys.
     
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