Need ladies help

[dobiegirl]

Hi
I am wondering if anyone here has had a partner diagnosed with prostate cancer and if they did if they have any helpful advice for me. My husband just got the diagnoses and I am having a hard time with him. He has shut me out completely right now. I am giving him some space but if anyone who has been in this position could offer me any advice on how they dealt with it and how they helped their partner I would really appreciate it
thanks

 

[Hippie Hollow Girl]

Dobiegirl,

I am sorry to hear this. And I don't have the life experience that you asked for exactly.......But 2 of my grandfathers were diagnosed with prostate cancer. My great grandfather...mother's mother's father........and my dad's father. Both of them had very slow growing cancers. Both were in their eighties when diagnosed. And both lived ten more years after the diagnosis......died of old age and heart failure......in their nineties.

How far advanced is the cancer? What does the dr. say? My great grandfather's prostate cancer had spread to his kidneys......and he still lived 10 years after the diagnosis.

I would do whatever the dr. tells you to do.

Then as far as the shock and depression and fear of the unknown that your man is going through ......you may need to get some professional help. Give him a couple of weeks first....... sometimes it takes a little while to absorb the news. Just make sure that he knows you are there for him......that you love him......and that you will be there for him no matter what. Do the same for him that you would want someone to do for you if you just found out you had something like this happening to you. My man does not handle medical stuff very well. That is why I recomended professional help.......counseling.

 

[dobiegirl]

I will suggest the professional help but am not sure its going to get me very far. Lets just say he is somewhat resistant to stuff like that. I kind of think once he heard the word cancer he just blanked out and hasn't heard anything since. Thanks for the reply,I appreciate it .

 

[Symphonic]

Cancer can be devestating. For the moment just watch him, depending on when he got the news the shock may still be there. I know it was when I got diagnosed with a certain disease; it'll fade with time, but don't let him do anything too wild. Just listen for now, and if he expresses himself all the better, but don't crowd on him or make him and his lifelong image of himself shatter; if he was a man's man, let him still be that and treat him with little difference, etc.

 

[dobiegirl]

Thank you thats good advice too. To tell the truth the whole thing has me a little un-nerved .....not the cancer but the way he went so far away so fast.