Need some opinions please. :D

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by aqua-illusion, Aug 3, 2011.

  1. aqua-illusion

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    Hello Everyone!

    Firstly, I would like to thank everyone for helping me with my previous "relationship" issue. I have been able to turn off my "attraction" to my co-worker and have kept the relationship professional.

    Now I have another...situation I guess you can call it. I talked about a new guy at my work which was in the "Appearance" threads as he is always wearing skin-tight bulge showing pants. This guy I'll call "Jeff" is only a Summer student and is basically leaving my Company after August to go back to University.

    Here is the dilemma, now I'm attracted to him (cute, adorable, hot-tight little body, nice ass, and of course enormous bulge) as he's...shown to be somewhat "gayish" and people at work wonder if he is straight or not as he seems gay. My gaydar is absolutely horrible so I'm looking for people's opinions on his actions...a little insight if you would call it.

    1. He talks kind of girly, has the "gay lisp" that a lot of feminine gay men have
    2. Wears pink shirts at least once a week (2 weeks ago he wore pink shirts three times)
    3. He was listening to his I-pod and when I went over to his desk to borrow a pen he sexy-winked at me. (do straight guys wink at other guys? LOL)
    4. He's kind of girly; I scared him a couple times like...if you're looking at your computer monitor and come up behind and try to get their attention, he'll do a little girly jump, lol.
    5. He likes Lady GaGa, LOL (ok, how many actual straight men like her music?)
    6. He dresses very "metro", kind of flamboyant with bright colours, ALWAYS super tight pants that show off an impressive bulge:eek: and an even more impressive cock:eek: (I admit it...I urinal-peeked...I apologize if it offends anyone)

    So would you think he's gay/bi or just a really girly straight man?
    Any insight would be great! Thanks!

    PS. Before he leaves for school...if my suspicions are right I want to tell him that I like him/think he's adorable...but, need other people's views first to "confirm"

    Thanks again! :biggrin1:
    PPS. Since he's leaving for school it wouldn't be a "conflict of interest" if I pursued him outside of work.
     
    #1 aqua-illusion, Aug 3, 2011
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2011
  2. MysteryMahn

    MysteryMahn Member

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    It is likely, but to avoid stereotyping there is no way to say for certain.

    You should tell him you like him (You dont need to refer to liking him in a relationship way, could just be as buds) and say you would like to keep in touch when he leaves, ask him to go for a drink to celebrate on his last day and start talking.
     
  3. uncut1

    uncut1 Member

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    Go with your gut feelings.Being girly isn't a problem if it's okay with you.I would be more concerned about it starting to interfer with work.
     
  4. aqua-illusion

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    hahaha, no girly isn't an issue, he's actually too adorable because of it...it's endearing in a cute kind of way. :D
     
  5. lvsxy808

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    Well, you're certainly basing your assumptions on some pretty hoary old stereotypes. But that doesn't necessarily mean you're wrong. Stereotypes exist for a reason.

    Does he know you're bi? Because even if he is gay, it's a very brave thing to wink at another man if you don't know for certain that he's open to it. If he does know, then it would seem to indicate he's interested right back.

    Just get to know him. Chat to him in the lunch room, gossip over the water cooler, etc. Ask him what he does outside of work, see if you have any interests in common, and then ask him if he would be interested in you joining him in those interests. Then if it turns out you're wrong about him, you have a legitimate "out." And if you're not wrong, it will become clear when you're alone together without other work colleagues looking over your shoulder.

    .
     
  6. B_patrickmcc

    B_patrickmcc New Member

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    Pink shirts? Wouldnt put to much into that.
    Since you identify yoruself as bisexual, I suggest you apprach him the same way you would if you were interested in a female intern.
    Ask him out. He may be gay, may be bi, may be straight, and even may be unsure or scared about his sexuality. In any event, you wont know unless you act. Given your description of him, doubt you have to worry about him punching you in the nose.
     
  7. aqua-illusion

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    Been trying to get to know him(ask him to come along for coffee, etc) seems to be working...apparently he mentioned to me he knows he wears tight pants...(uh oh does he know I stare at his amazing bulge then? lol)
     
  8. aqua-illusion

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    Ahhhh I can't stop thinking about him...it's hard, I end up wanting to talk to him all day long, it's a distraction.

    The feeling I have is totally different than the other guy in my office I had feelings for...maybe because there is a chance it could be reciprocated? I don't know...he makes me smile, and I could stare at his tight little body all day long, also his massive bulge...

    He's given me more hints that he just might be gay/bi but then say something else...but I'm afraid to lay it out on the table...I've never actually been in a situation where a guy in real-life could possibly like me back. :D lol.
     
  9. erratic

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    First off, this all sounds very exciting. Enjoy it :)

    But you asked my advice and this is it: If this guy isn't queer, from the sounds of it he should be used to queers crushing on him. If I were you I'd be saying something like "Listen, I know we're coworkers, but I totally have a crush on you. Would you be interested in going for coffee after you're done here?"

    1) You're flattering him.

    2) You're making yourself a bit vulnerable, which is hot.

    3) You're giving him the chance to say yes or no, politely.

    4) You're giving him the chance to play the "sorry, we're co-workers" card in case he wants to let you down easy.

    5) You're implicitly honouring his boundaries by suggesting a date after he's finished, which says you're thinking about his comfort first.

    6) You're not waiting until after he leaves and his head is back in school mode to make your move.

    7) Most importantly, you're being a gentleman about it all.
     
  10. aqua-illusion

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    Well, funny thing is...that's EXACTLY one of the things(gay guy hitting on him) that happened that makes me wonder if he's gay or not.

    He was watching the front desk and I was to relieve him for his lunch and he went down to City Hall for lunch (we work downtown) and when he came back he said to me: "Funny thing happened, a gay guy tried to hit on me" And I was like "oh really?! What happened?"
    He replies: "I was reading my book and some guy kept walking past me, I didn't pay attention at first but noticed he walked by me a couple more times, I wasn't sure but I looked up and sort of smiled because I thought it was amusing, then he tried to beckon me over to some secluded spot"
    And so I say to him "Ohhh, so you liked it?" and he says "I thought it was fun" then he says "I know I wear tight pants but..."

    And since then he's given little extra hints he wants something more....but I'd be too afraid to come right out and tell him as no one at work knows I'm bi. He's ever so adorable :tongue:...can't stop thinking about him. :redface:
     
    #10 aqua-illusion, Aug 9, 2011
    Last edited: Aug 9, 2011
  11. erratic

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    Sounds like a golden opportunity to talk to him about your being bi...
     
  12. aqua-illusion

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    I think I will take the opportunity to let him know before he goes back to school in 2 1/2 weeks...if not, I think I'd regret it even more for not telling him and possibly him feeling the same way, I would think "what if" for the rest of my life. :(
     
  13. Fiendofdopeisland

    Fiendofdopeisland New Member

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    Any updates? Any pictures? :D
     
  14. aqua-illusion

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    He was on vacation all this week with his family and should be back Monday...

    I actually did sneak a picture of him...but it's not in THIS thread. :D
     
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