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Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Pecker, Jul 6, 2009.
Tell me now - I'm getting ready to go to Wal-Mart.
Oooooo, lovely thanx...i would like a pack of bacon, with two slices because anymore than that will go to waste (i don't eat much of that item) and could it be not too fatty but not too stringy and no sheen on it would be great, don't mind smoked or unsmoked really not fussed....and could it be in a purple packet cos everything in my fridge is colour-co-ordinated....and a block of cheese!
Yeah I need a job
Fresh ammo for my rifle.
A box of crayons~~crayola with the pencil sharpener in the box
A dozen boxs of Cheeze Nip crackers
4 large jars of peanut butter~~crunchy.
2 pairs of overalls with one leg removed for summertime wearing
1 goat trap
A Kathy Lee Gifford dart board
a bottle of hydrogen peroxide
Dial soap~~white or blue
a dozen lightbulbs~~any type size I just need to toss them at people at night who annoy me.
A copy of Rush Limbaugh's latest book~~get the audio too if it's available
~~~~and most important the cash from all the registers.
A bottle of 50 fruit-flavoured glucose tablets. Several dollars cheaper than Kroger's.
A new cup for Hockeyguy.
A bunch of bananas for hootie
Leg tan spray for rickyg1964
A video of beretta showering.
Kleenex for me.
Is Mr Pecker back from the shop with our stuff yet?
Tell me about it, looks like bacon for breakfast tomorrow instead of for tea tonight. The service here is negligible! (but i'm not fussed)
Make that two,I need one also.....
Can you make that three? i really hate mine and some of the barstewards i work with
a pack of sum trojans mags, some briefs, and ummmmm snacks
i would really like some of their 'everything' bagels (found fresh in the bakery). thanks.
Okay, I'll get it from the deli by the slice and I'll have them stamp it with the purple USDA Inspected thingie...will head cheese do?
They always need greeters. You get to put happy face stickers on the kids.
Crayons - check (the a/c went out - slightly melted)
Cheese Nips - yuck - I like Cheez-It better
I got extra peanut butter on special - it's from that last recall
2 pr one-legged overalls, Hanna Montana pink and yellow
I asked for a goat trap and they gave me a giant glueboard sticky mouse trap
The only Dart Board they have has anti-union sayings on it
Five gallons of H₂O₂ (50¢ worth)
They only have Gold Dial - sorry
12 fluorescent flashlight bulbs
Rush Limbaugh's book and audio - they said to check a used book store
There was no cash in the registers - everybody uses plastic these days
Equate glucose tabs in quart container
Cup, bananas, leg spray, video and Kleenex - sounds like a party at Tardis's place
Please. The place was as crowded as the Dollar Store on the first of the month.
They always need a greeter at the exit, too, to take the smileyface stickies back from the kids
I heard they need somebody to clean up on aisle 3.
12 Magnums, 3 Spiderman briefs and Nabisco Ummmm's snacks coming up
They're sold out of all their bagels except for the artificailly-flavored anchovie ones.
The grand total comes to $3.42, tax included.
Tomorrow I'm planning on eating in. (I love anchovies.)
Wait..... Pecker leaves the computer?
WalMart carries colored contacts, I'd like a pair in every color.
Hello Mr Pecker, do you think you could get me some Nice biscuits when you go the shop again?
Er Pecker, can you give me my change please? or do you charge $18 for going?.
From Wal-mart? In a BLOCK?
i def. need to have some quality cat food...my pussy is starving! (no pun intended for all the dirty minds out there! lol)
Hey, save your money ricky and keep your change , i got a meat stick here for your starving pussy, here kitty kitty:biggrin1: