dv8edthots: I was just wondering what everyone's done during their first sexual encounter with a new partner to put him/her at ease with their size, especially when they're nervous or "scared"? Or ladies/gentleman what puts you at ease when you have sex for the first time with a hung guy?
The_Swinging_Voter: Unless they've voiced some apprehension I take the 'softly, softly' route. That is, I dont expect full penetration, I pay very close attention to how aroused and comfortable they are and, most importantly, I ask for regular updates. Oh, and use a lot of lube.
As coming from a region what uses the metric system, If someone states 28cm x 22cm, I know I shouldn't be to "scared" as probably the claim is in some way misscalculated and therefore exceed one's expectations in a more then average size.
I know that about 95% of the questions on the site could be answered along the lines of: "it's different for every partner", In my, somewhat limited, experience, I've dealt with my partner's size-fears the same way I've dealt with their other fears. With me, it's mostly through conversation and corny jokes. Anyone is a lighter mood is always more willing to try more 'daunting' experiences.
A tranquilizer dart usually does the trick. [post=278507]Quoted post[/post][/b][/quote] NB: If you plan on having sex with an elephant, two tranquiliser darts are recommended. If you plan on having sex with a whale, well, there's something wrong with you.
I let my partner have the top position so they are in control of the rate and depth of penetration. This is after a whole lot of talking and foreplay.
I'm not so huge that I have been refused entry, but what helps the most is that I love foreplay (and during play and after play.) When it was time to enter her for the first time, I make sure I go slow and easy and usually within a minute or less, I'm all the way in and we're both enjoying each other. As many woman here have mentioned, the more they are with a larger guy, the easier penetration gets, as they adjust to the size. LapDog
Generally speaking, take it slowly, gently and lovingly. If you are truly doing this not just for your pleasure but for a shared experience with your partner, that partner will soon understand this, overcome any nervousness and truly desire it, irrespective of almost any perceived size mismatch.
The comfort level has to be there for me. Be I the top or the bottom, there has to be a comfort level. Guys I would meet that were curious or new to the male/male experience, I'd invite them over, we'd have a couple beers, play some video games, talk, whatever to reduce the uncomfortable zone. Being on the receiving end of mistreatment sexually makes you more sensitive. Most of the dudes have appreciated the time and were very happy that I saw them as a person with feelings versus a trophy. My friend that was 10.5" was able to top me because we'd known each other for a while before we got to that point and he had mad skillz....I was on the ceiling long before penetration ever happened. I knew he was in when he started, but because there was so much comfort and familiarity there, I didn't seize up which I'm prone to do.
My wife and I usually do a lot of foreplay and I let her begin by being on top. This just lets her choose the pace of the penetration. This can make for a very erotic situation mood if she finds your size exciting as it does daunting.
I did not really have to deal with this issue until recently, as much of the time I been with the same woman who could take me in......but she is gone now and am single again. If it is a one-nighter, then I try to do it in the dark so she does not really see my penis at all. Its not really been a problem since a lot of the women I been with generally had fuller figures. I just ensure they are wet enough and when it is time to insert.. then from vulva to cervix I insert in a swift move. Unless she tells me to be gentle prior. If it is with someone I care for...then do it as slowly as possible...... not really to be gentle...but more to prolong the moment.
Honestly, There is really nothing you can do to trully ease them. My wife asked me when we first got together "what the hell am I supposed to do with that" You figure it out. But makes tring to get it in all that much more fun.