Never being satisfied with your body

Discussion in 'Underwear, Clothing, and Appearance Issues' started by MII, Aug 24, 2010.

  1. MII

    MII Member

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    First, I want to start off with a little history about myself. I am 22 years old, about 6'2", and now about 170lbs.

    Just a little over a year ago, I had surgery for a deviated septum and turbinate reduction which required my nose (due to a long history of injuries) to be broken and reset. Normally, recovery time for the specific routine surgery is about 6 weeks, however, due to complications with my own healing and lack of sufficient diet (I was a college student, at the time) My healing time lasted over the course of 2 months.

    During the time, I experienced heavy nosebleeds and a discharge that constantly dripped down my esophagus and into my stomach causing me to always feel full and rarely eat actual food.

    Over the course of that summer, I initially weighed about 153 lbs., but after barely eating that entire summer, I dropped down to about 140 lbs. At 6'2" tall, I was drastically underweight and my clothes no longer fit, I was constantly tired and sluggish and my friends remarked that I looked sick.

    After I felt that I was fully recovered, I adopted an intensive workout plan, which consisted of a high protein, high carb diet coupled with a 5 day workout plan.

    Over the course of the next eight months, I gained all of the weight back plus twenty more mostly in the form of lean muscle mass and very little fat.

    My workout regime began in September of 09 and one year later, I know in in reality that I look 10 times better than I ever have before. However, in my mind, I can never shake the feeling of not being happy with my body.

    When I look at my body I see an image of the body I used to have, I want bigger shoulders, forearms, better abs, and bigger quads.

    I'm not fishing for compliments or critiques on my own physicality, instead I'd like to know if others, who have lost or gained weight have the same feelings about their own bodies?
     
  2. Industrialsize

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    In my adult life I have weighed at different times between 145 and 230. I've learned not to trust the image I see in the mirror because my brain will process it in a way that has nothing to do with reality.
     
  3. 0837s

    0837s Member

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    I know how you feel, except in a different way. I'm 5'11, 130lbs, runner build. I apparently had an issue with my stomach when I was born, and had to have immediate surgery on it, or I would have died. (I still have a 4" scar on my abdomen that will never go away). That being said, I have always had a lean/thin build, which I am not happy with.

    I can eat ANYTHING I want and not put on any weight at all. I do go running a couple of times a week, but thats all. I'm a business professional, so the majority of my day is spent inside an office, not a ton of physical activity.

    I am planning on getting a gym membership and finding a work out partner or personal trainer to bulk up- I'd like to add 30lbs in upper body muscle- then I'll be happier with my body.
     
  4. B_cosmognosis

    B_cosmognosis New Member

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    I can completely understand the feelings you are having. I have always been underweight because of my metabolism. The bonus is, I can literally eat anything without having to worry about gaining weight ('cept for a slight tummy bulge). The hard part is getting and keeping muscular bulk. I work out almost every day and though I know that I have a decent frame, I still don't think I'm 'there' yet.
    You are to be congratulated for the effort that you have devoted to working out. Just be happy that you're healthy and in shape. So many are not and don't have the will to do what you've done.
     
  5. bigbrisguy

    bigbrisguy Active Member

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    Wait... you had all these before? Fuck me if you look like you do now, you must have been fucking awesome previously.

    Don't know if it helps, but the way you look know, I would fuck you in a heart beat
     
  6. JMan251

    JMan251 New Member

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    I started lifting regularly in april of '09. I started off around 135 maybe even a little less but the impetus behind it was a lack of satisfaction in my very lean runner's build. This past April I joined a gym and see a trainer once a week. I came into the gym at 153. I now weigh a hair under 170 very little fat, although with a giant bulking phase like mine, a little fat is inevitable. I've learned a ton at the gym and especially from my trainer and I will say that regular leg exercise has been a huge component of my development. I'm impressed that I was able to come this far and beat my high metabolism but I still don't feel like I'm 'there' yet. Upper body gains have been very slow for me. Never give up!
     
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