new gf new problems

molotovmuffin

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So check this out. The guy I'm seeing isn't the biggest I've ever been with nor is he the smallest but man o man does he feel great!

Suck it up. You asked, she told. Grow up.
 

NotSoDumb_Blonde

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So the new gf and I are talking after sex and she lets slip that she was once with a guy so big she tore a little. I asked how big was the guy was and she gestures, so basically about 7" around and a good 9" long. This normally wouldn't bother me since she was bound to have had some bigger guys in her past like I've had some tighter women. However, I guess because I was cool about it she felt secure to go a bit further and said that bigger is better since it hits all the right areas, granted that there is a thing as too big like some guys are too small. That's what bugs me most, which I know for a fact since we've played with toys, one of which she couldn't get enough of which she had faster, harder orgasms with than just with me. I guess I'm just venting more than anything, but I don't understand why she'd say this stuff and could use some ideas on how to handle this.

uh, just a question, since I'm not going to read this entire thread (I don't like generalizations either in regards to men, or women), but...could she have been talking about how good you are? I mean, you said, "that bigger is better since it hits all the right areas," was she seriously being this mean to you, or was she complimenting you -- meaning you were big and hit all her spots? IDK, but wow, after sex, that I assume she enjoyed, would she really be so...horrible? Thoughtless? If you play with toys, maybe it's not the size of the toy, but you using it on her, the feel of it, how you're hitting her spots and so on...it might not be the size at all. Just a thought. I know, believe me I know, how sensitive everyone (man or woman) is about sex and past relationships. Just asking if perhaps you were hurt, and heard her comments through that...?

by the way, I'd not take ANY guys advice here on gf suggesting you give back the snarly, or women are all devious bitches. Just saying. :rolleyes: Consider the source ....
 

AlphaMale

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Did she actually say he was 9x7" or did you just guesstimate that's what she was saying? Because if she stated that specifically then we know she wasn't being honest about that.

If she just said he was "bigger" or whatever then maybe she was being truthful, but at the same time I would also question 'why' she would be telling you that (or "let that slip", etc.).

==

She said bigger is better, so how is that not the same as saying that the past guy was better than you?
 
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BS76

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The toy is 6-6.25" circumference and was no issue at all so he had to be a fair amount larger. She grabbed our wrists for comparison and said it was closer to mine, maybe more. That's how I guesstimated the girth
 

Thirdlegproduction

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So I'm going to ask gently, if a woman in a relationship attacks her man's ego/manhood for the purpose of establishing dominance in the relationship why should he not snarl back?

Not what happened in this case but it sounds like it's some unholy act for a man to do it.
 

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So I'm going to ask gently, if a woman in a relationship attacks her man's ego/manhood for the purpose of establishing dominance in the relationship why should he not snarl back?

Not what happened in this case but it sounds like it's some unholy act for a man to do it.

Good question.
 

Kotchanski

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I don't have a problem with her showing you a rough estimate of his size, you did ask after all, but after suggesting he is bigger than yourself, to go on and point out that she feels bigger is better, and that bigger hits all the right spots, I dunno, I have a hard time not reading that as her suggesting he was better than you, after all, she did make it clear she thought you were smaller, not bigger.

That in itself isn't so much of an issue, rarely are two people together based on sex alone, and those relationships generally fail anyway, so no harm done if that is the case, it'll just speed things up a little. What is an issue is if you don't tell her how you heard those words and the meaning you gathered from them and that it bothered you. If after you've explained, and she's counter explained and you've come to a point where you are both happy in the knowledge that you now understand each other, she continues to make such comments, then there can be no denying that at best she is an insensitive bitch (much like a man would be if things were reversed and the topic was boob size for example) at which point, you can either be a man and walk away, or be an asshole and get your own digs in before walking away, but doing either before you've reached that point would just make you a little pathetic.
 

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I don't have a problem with her showing you a rough estimate of his size, you did ask after all, but after suggesting he is bigger than yourself, to go on and point out that she feels bigger is better, and that bigger hits all the right spots, I dunno, I have a hard time not reading that as her suggesting he was better than you, after all, she did make it clear she thought you were smaller, not bigger.

That in itself isn't so much of an issue, rarely are two people together based on sex alone, and those relationships generally fail anyway, so no harm done if that is the case, it'll just speed things up a little. What is an issue is if you don't tell her how you heard those words and the meaning you gathered from them and that it bothered you. If after you've explained, and she's counter explained and you've come to a point where you are both happy in the knowledge that you now understand each other, she continues to make such comments, then there can be no denying that at best she is an insensitive bitch (much like a man would be if things were reversed and the topic was boob size for example) at which point, you can either be a man and walk away, or be an asshole and get your own digs in before walking away, but doing either before you've reached that point would just make you a little pathetic.

Very well said! :smile:
 

redz_rule

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I'm not sure about the 'new problems' part of your title. You don't seem to be having much luck. Your ex moved on to an unbelievably (and I mean unbelievably 11.25 x 7.25) well endowed man, who also then had sex with your next gf who you split from because she kept fantasising about big dick guy and now this one telling you bigger is better. I don't know what to tell ya, other than you seem to have been incredibly unlucky...
 

Endued

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BS76

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I don't have a problem with her showing you a rough estimate of his size, you did ask after all, but after suggesting he is bigger than yourself, to go on and point out that she feels bigger is better, and that bigger hits all the right spots, I dunno, I have a hard time not reading that as her suggesting he was better than you, after all, she did make it clear she thought you were smaller, not bigger.

That in itself isn't so much of an issue, rarely are two people together based on sex alone, and those relationships generally fail anyway, so no harm done if that is the case, it'll just speed things up a little. What is an issue is if you don't tell her how you heard those words and the meaning you gathered from them and that it bothered you. If after you've explained, and she's counter explained and you've come to a point where you are both happy in the knowledge that you now understand each other, she continues to make such comments, then there can be no denying that at best she is an insensitive bitch (much like a man would be if things were reversed and the topic was boob size for example) at which point, you can either be a man and walk away, or be an asshole and get your own digs in before walking away, but doing either before you've reached that point would just make you a little pathetic.

We talked about it. She didn't realize what she said and I explained guys don't need to know that stuff, that if anything the Guy you're with will want to hear that he's the biggest and best. We had a running joke about a sclerosis of one to 10 in how good it is, and I cracked 10 a few weeks back with her saying no lie I was the best she'd ever had. Its just she's a bit naive when it comes to limiting honesty.
 

NotSoDumb_Blonde

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So I'm going to ask gently, if a woman in a relationship attacks her man's ego/manhood for the purpose of establishing dominance in the relationship why should he not snarl back?

Not what happened in this case but it sounds like it's some unholy act for a man to do it.

Well, I'll respond just as gently, WM. First, why would you BE in a relationship with someone who obviously has no respect for you? Establish dominance? What are you talking about? I think you and I think of relationships as completely different human interactions. I look for someone to share, you seem to be looking for someone to take from. I look for equal respect, you seem to be looking to feel superior and respected....Of course, this is merely from dissecting your use of certain words, but to me, there should be no 'dominance' in a relationship. There is a give and take, some parts of the relationship one person gives more, other times they give less, but dominating someone is never part of my ideal interaction with someone, not unless he's breaking out the silk scarves and some hot wax. ;)

I don't think it's an unholy act to snarl back at someone, but it does seem useless and a bit childish to be in a relationship with someone that doesn't respect you and reduces you to snide remarks to feel better about your role in a relationship.

(Maybe this should be another thread, though? Relationship Roles, or something, since the poor op is trying to get some feedback, I assume and not bash past or present gf/so.)
 

Thirdlegproduction

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You come across as very naive notsodumb.

First I'd like to say that I share your outlook on how a relationship should be like there's give and take and an equal partnership.

And all people will agree to some extend on that, but in real life however most people talk the talk but don't walk the walk.

Why would I be in a relationship with someone who has no respect for me? I wouldn't but it never starts out that way. It has a way of creeping into the relationship.
You can then say goodbye as well when it happens but you have invested a lot of time in this person by then to just walk away like that.

Establishing dominance is very common in a relationship, look around you. Mom and dad grandparents, neighbours, friends theres always one or the other that pulls most of the strings, in most cases it's the women even if it's from behind the curtain.

Like for example when they withold sex from their man when they want something done from them. That is power they hold over their partner so that's not equality.

At some point or another all women yes all women test their partners for boundaries, it's a healthy thing to see if the man is a quality man or not. And most of the times the testing is not a conscious action either.

Some women however like to test where a man's boundaries are when insulting him to see if he's able to man up or not. I've had this happened to me as well some women making a scene just to see if she could or not.
I had the balls to walk away from her in the middle of the date and she found some new gained respect for me, so I passed her test but I don't want anything to do with manipulative people like that even if they are hot.

Making it short, when you meet her there's no paper on her forehead that says I will dissrespect you in the future so you can't always avoid it but you can learn how to react to such people and one of those ways not to let them get to you is by mirrorring the snarky comment right back to them effectively punishing their behaviour so they won't do it again.

Sometimes though we endure it not because of a relationship but because we want to go ballsdeep in her. But take a look around there's always one end that holds more weight in the relationship then the other.
 

molotovmuffin

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Good question.

No it's not because it isn't being discussed here, it's being injected. Take it to another thread.

On that note, I agree with Kotch.

Also, I would like to point out that size is in the eye of the beholder, what appears one size to one, is in fact a different size to the other. Also, if the ex tore her upon penetration, it may have been that she wasn't fully aroused and/or lubed up enough. She may have also meant that she isn't fully lubed with the OP and that would be why sex doesn't feel as good. Sometimes body parts just don't fit, it's not her fault nor is it his. He just happened to ask and she felt comfortable enough with him to tell. NOT that she explained herself very well.

Sort of like a lot of responses on this website.:wink:
 

AlphaMale

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No it's not because it isn't being discussed here, it's being injected. Take it to another thread.

On that note, I agree with Kotch.

Also, I would like to point out that size is in the eye of the beholder, what appears one size to one, is in fact a different size to the other. Also, if the ex tore her upon penetration, it may have been that she wasn't fully aroused and/or lubed up enough. She may have also meant that she isn't fully lubed with the OP and that would be why sex doesn't feel as good. Sometimes body parts just don't fit, it's not her fault nor is it his. He just happened to ask and she felt comfortable enough with him to tell. NOT that she explained herself very well.

Sort of like a lot of responses on this website.:wink:

What's with all you people who get uppity and upset about someone mentioning something that isn't 150% in line with the original topic? Who cares? Why do you care so much?

You didn't even respond to the person that posted it, you responded to me.

If someone wants to bring up something that is semi-related to what people have been saying on the thread or the original topic then get over it! That was suggested by multiple people already on this thread to either do or not do it, so he was asking more about it. There's no harm in that.

All I said was "Good question." I didn't even say if I thought it was ok or not. I actually wanted to see what people's responses were going to be, but way to turn that into something to argue about. :rolleyes:

Topic police in the building!! Woop Woop!! ... Sheesh!? :cool:
 
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Kotchanski

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Not to take sides, but it kinda became the topic when some suggested that behavior and others responded that it wasn't cool to follow that advice without making any comment as to the comment she made and how uncool that was.

Topics grow, bend and change, especially when the topic is asking for advice!
 

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Tried out a sleeve/extender with her last night and holy crap! We measured me after the fact and it's 9x7. The girth is about right for her, but it could use another inch or two in length. I was drilling her pretty hard doggy style last night and she still had room to go. Just so happens I've got these on the way...

TSX-1338 :: Exqueletor Extender

TSX-1339 :: Scrotox Extender

If she lets me I'll see if I can get some pics of them in use.