New relationship and this site

[MickeyLee]

I think he meant "discreet". :dunno:

Hypothetically if I were to date a man without a larger penis I would not tell him I came here. I guess I'd just delete my account.

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[D_Sparroe Spongecaques]

My bf is well above average but he would be annoyed if he knew i was a member of this site.Sex with him cannot be topped and he pleases me everytime.Part of that is knowing he finds me incredibly sexy and hot and partly due to me thinking the same about him...and yes that does include the size of his penis.

If we split up and i then met someone new depending on the guy would depend on if i told him i was on here.

i'm a big fan of older woman/younger man relationships

For once i agree with you.I probably wouldnt have a LTR with anyone older than me......been there n done that and never again!

 

[dolfette]

Dolfette's question to you was legitimate. Your own bias makes membership here a big deal. Try for a moment to "pretend" that it could be very normal and unremarkable to be a member here, and to visit and participate often. You'd then have a perspective more similar to mine or Dolfette's.
<snip>
It's really just not important to everyone. It may be a big deal to you, but then maybe you're still a little more wrapped up in your penis insecurities than you think.

exactly.

unless i'm having cybersex here (which would count as cheating IMO) then it's just not an issue. if i was going to look at pics, how would that be different to a guy looking at porn? if i was going to talk about sex, how would that be different to talking about sex with my friends?

it's just not that big a deal.

 

[dolfette]

I guess I'd just delete my account.

and would he stop talking to women or looking at porn with bigger boobs than yours? :tongue:

 

[Enid]

and would he stop talking to women or looking at porn with bigger boobs than yours? :tongue:

Oh I dunno. I wasn't being too serious about saying I'd delete my account. I see nothing wrong with coming here, and I agree with what you said about it not being a big deal. I come here mostly for the men & women with whom I've developed friendships (and a little bit to post here in the women's section).

IF I were to date a non-large guy I may or may not lose interest in coming here generally. Then again, I could feasibly lose interest in coming here for any reason. If I did leave I would maintain email and chat contact with the people I've befriended however.

I guess I shoulda phrased my original response as "Maybe I'd delete my account, maybe I wouldn't."

I do know I wouldn't mention my membership here. Mostly due to it being nobody's bidness but my own, and a little so as not to raise any potential insecurity.

 

[KTF40]

if i was going to look at pics, how would that be different to a guy looking at porn? if i was going to talk about sex, how would that be different to talking about sex with my friends?

it's just not that big a deal.

I don't think the porn comparison is a good comparison. There's tons of reasons for guys to visit porn. I think one of the major ones is our sex drive is just too high and we need a release somewhere. Porn is an easy way to get off without cheating. And if you were going to talk about sex with friends, you just happen to go talk at the site dedicated to huge cocks instead of the hundreds of other ones around the internet?

I think it's pretty obvious to see why any guy with an average/small penis would be concerned if he realized his partner was visiting this site regularly.

 

[petite]

I think in the long run, it would be better for the boyfriend/husband to know; just as a means of getting to know and understand one another better. I think it might be a bit of a shocker at first and might bruise his ego but if it is part of your sexual fantasies and he loves you and you love him I'm sure it would turn out in the end. Would you prefer the same courtesy in return? [not rhetorical, an actual question]

You are projecting because you enjoy SPH.

I would like the same courtesy myself that I would extend to any man I am seeing. Let me use a non-sexual example.

I appreciate the fact that TheBoyfriend doesn't tell me that he has an ex-girlfriend who had a much better sense of humor and how much funnier she was than me. I appreciate the fact that TheBoyfriend doesn't tell me that any of his ex-girlfriends was more intelligent. I appreciate the fact that TheBoyfriend has never told me that he had an ex-girlfriend with a much better bottom than me.

These are all things that would make me feel insecure, inadequate, and unhappy. He knows that those things would make me feel insecure and because he is a considerate and kind person, he's never told me anything like that. I don't know if he's ever dated someone smarter, funnier, and with a better bottom. I appreciate that he is sensitive towards my feelings. It's one of the ways that he shows me that he loves me.

i think the whole idea of being expected to confess it as though it's a sin is just plain stupid.

I don't think anyone should disclose everything to every lover or be expected to do so.

I think it's pretty obvious to see why any guy with an average/small penis would be concerned if he realized his partner was visiting this site regularly.

I agree. I would care more about the feelings of the person I love than visiting a website. That's just me and the choice I would make.

 

[dolfette]

I don't think the porn comparison is a good comparison. There's tons of reasons for guys to visit porn. I think one of the major ones is our sex drive is just too high and we need a release somewhere. Porn is an easy way to get off without cheating. And if you were going to talk about sex with friends, you just happen to go talk at the site dedicated to huge cocks instead of the hundreds of other ones around the internet?

I think it's pretty obvious to see why any guy with an average/small penis would be concerned if he realised his partner was visiting this site regularly.

so...whould he confess to or stop watching any porn with bigger tits/tighter cunts/tighter buns than me? should i be ''concerned''?
do you think that women don't need some wank inspiration? looking at dicks here is EXACTLY the same as guys looking at porn.

the only difference is that it's assumed women should be cool with the perfect bodied porn stars. and we should. fantasy is fantasy and reality is reality. so why should we give big dicked porn or chat for the sake of his feelings?
it's the 21st century. women are allowed to be interested in sex too.

 

[vince]

so...whould he confess to or stop watching any porn with bigger tits/tighter cunts/tighter buns than me? should i be ''concerned''?
do you think that women don't need some wank inspiration? looking at dicks here is EXACTLY the same as guys looking at porn.

the only difference is that it's assumed women should be cool with the perfect bodied porn stars. and we should. fantasy is fantasy and reality is reality. so why should we give big dicked porn or chat for the sake of his feelings?
it's the 21st century. women are allowed to be interested in sex too.

Yeah but dolfette... don't you know? Men NEED sex and therefore porn to release (hopefully not on the keyboard) the tension. For women it's optional and they should consider the bf's feelings.

 

[petite]

so...whould he confess to or stop watching any porn with bigger tits/tighter cunts/tighter buns than me? should i be ''concerned''?
do you think that women don't need some wank inspiration? looking at dicks here is EXACTLY the same as guys looking at porn.

the only difference is that it's assumed women should be cool with the perfect bodied porn stars. and we should. fantasy is fantasy and reality is reality. so why should we give big dicked porn or chat for the sake of his feelings?
it's the 21st century. women are allowed to be interested in sex too.

I really don't agree with KTF40 every man has a higher sex drive than women do. I have dated a few men whom I have outpaced with my sex drive. I don't have that problem now.

Dolfette, I agree with you that women deserve enjoying wank material the same as men. I would not stop watching porn, nor would I feel the need to confess my porn watching to my lover. I never expect TheBoyfriend to tell when he watches or what he's watching and it doesn't bother me. He doesn't ask me, either. We both just assume that the other one does it, and sometimes one of us will show the other one sexy vids we've found.

Like I said before though, from what I've learned from LPSG, I am now more convinced than ever that I need to be careful about men's egos when it comes to penis size. I feel that I have learned that there is a fragility there that I need to be very careful about, especially since most men just have whatever they were born with and they seem to be prone to have insecurities about it.

I wouldn't want to be with a man who makes me feel insecure about my breasts, for example.

There's a difference between watching porn with women with large breasts, that wouldn't bother me, but I wouldn't appreciate it if he told me he specifically watched porn with women who have larger breasts than me because that would be unnecessarily mean. If I accidentally discovered that he's regularly visiting a website where he can talk with thousands of real life large breasted women and where there are sections on breast enlargement with techniques and methods, then I would be bothered. Just watching big breasted porn seems like it's only sexual enjoyment. Visiting a website for big breasted women with an area for breast enlargement implies that he's either wishing to replace me or that he wants that I would or could change my own body. I think there's a difference there that would give me insecurity producing feelings that I wouldn't have if I just accidentally found porn on his computer with a woman that has large breasts.

 

[dolfette]

Yeah but dolfette... don't you know? Men NEED sex and therefore porn to release (hopefully not on the keyboard) the tension. For women it's optional and they should consider the bf's feelings.

boohoo etc!

 

[dolfette]

There's a difference between watching porn with women with large breasts, although I wouldn't appreciate it if he told me he specifically watched porn with women who have larger breasts than me because that would be unnecessarily mean. If I accidentally discovered that he's regularly visiting a website where he can talk with thousands of real life large breasted women where there are sections on breast enlargement with techniques and methods. Just watching big breasted porn seems like it's only sexual enjoyment. Visiting a website for big breasted women with an area for breast enlargement implies that he's either wishing to replace me or that he wants that I would or could change my own body. I think there's a difference there.

i don't agree with that at all. unless he was posting in the enlargement section about how much he wished i'd plastic up, why would i imagine that? just because there's a section on the board...it's a big board with a hell of a lot of sections in it.

that's like saying he shouldn't walk into a library because he knows that some of the books would be upsetting to me.

 

[petite]

i don't agree with that at all. unless he was posting in the enlargement section about how much he wished i'd plastic up, why would i imagine that? just because there's a section on the board...it's a big board with a hell of a lot of sections in it.

that's like saying he shouldn't walk into a library because he knows that some of the books would be upsetting to me.

If I went so far as to investigate what he specifically talks about and what he does on the site and found that he posted that he just loves and appreciates breasts in general, then I wouldn't be bothered. If I just saw that he went to the site and he didn't post enough for me to tell what he read or what interested him about the site, then I would have anxiety producing feelings that would be very unpleasant.

I'm not saying that he shouldn't do one thing or another. I was talking about how I would feel if I found out that he did one thing or another and how that kind of reasoning guides my behavior in regards to him. Having care about his emotions involves imagining how he might feel in certain circumstances and avoiding the actions that would produce the negative ones.

 

[mrbreasticles]

Yes AlteredEgo, discrete. The other one is weird. Thanks for the catch and replies.

this paragraph tells us you're projecting

Not sure what you meant here. Do you mean I am projecting the fact that this is more than just another site to visit on the internet and thus should not be treated differently as any other you may visit? If so that is an interesting point and I did not give that view as much thought but I did give it some. Yes, perhaps it was my past experience that biases me to this view but it is actually because BOTH of those sites you mention that I know for quite a few it is not. I think anyone that visits ether of those sites knows that, hence why I asked the question in the first place. Yes, this site can be viewed like any other you are right and if so then excellent why would you say anything? But if you don't feel that way or you think/know your significant other wouldn't feel that way then would you say anything? I guess that is a clearer version of my original question.

Dolfette I can see you point your first reply just came across as obtuse. Your following ones came across as a little abrasive but I guess given some posters here it pays to be so.

Everyone else, again thanks for the responses. I do like reading about how other people's relationships work in their similarities or differences.

 

[Enid]

Yes AlteredEgo, discrete. The other one is weird. Thanks for the catch and replies.

I'm sorry for being so pedantic but the word you are looking for is "discreet". :smile:

"Discrete" means a separate independent unit. (It's just one of those little things for me.)

 

[dolfette]

Dolfette I can see you point your first reply just came across as obtuse. Your following ones came across as a little abrasive but I guess given some posters here it pays to be so.

na, pet. that's just my personality. i'm an abrasive kinda girl.

 

[KTF40]

so...whould he confess to or stop watching any porn with bigger tits/tighter cunts/tighter buns than me? should i be ''concerned''?
do you think that women don't need some wank inspiration? looking at dicks here is EXACTLY the same as guys looking at porn.

the only difference is that it's assumed women should be cool with the perfect bodied porn stars. and we should. fantasy is fantasy and reality is reality. so why should we give big dicked porn or chat for the sake of his feelings?
it's the 21st century. women are allowed to be interested in sex too.

Like I said, I still don't think that's a good comparison. Just personally speaking, if my partner watched porn it wouldn't bother me at all. It is something both guys and girls can enjoy. There is porn for practically anyone. But something about my partner being a member of a site dedicated to big dicks is a red flag.

And the comparison of ass and tits to a dick is just not applicable. The only thing close to comparison of a dick on a female body would be her pussy (for the sake of this discussion). So the reality is, the comparison that could be made is let's say my partner was really loose, and I was a member of a site dedicated to tight pussies. And you know what, I could perfectly understand why she would have a problem with that.

I'm not saying women can't talk about sex or be interested in sex, but if you spend your time discussing sex on a site dedicated to big dicks, and I don't have a big dick, than yeah I'm going to be concerned. You can talk and be interested in sex practically anywhere on the internet, but your choice of forum is the one for guys with big dicks? I don't now, sounds pretty sketchy.

And also, I'm not saying you should give that up if you're in a relationship. Nowhere have I ever said that. It's your decision. I'm just disagreeing with you when you just brush it off by saying, "it's just not that big a deal" when it would be a big deal to someone like me and I'm sure to many other people.

 

[dolfette]

an oversensitive soul would be scared off a relationship with me WAY before it got serious enough for them to notice my web usage.

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

OH please, red flag? I see all sorts of guys with a collection of big tit porn, anal porn, fake lesbian porn. Is that a red flag too? The g-spot is located about a half a finger length inside the vagina and most women have mind blowing orgasms from a middle finger and some clitoral stimulation- something she can do alone, or a guy can do without his dick involved.

It's socially preferrable that a woman prefer a big dick over a regular sized one. It's socially acceptable for men to LOVE to see two women together, big tits and want to fuck a girls asshole. If his woman doesn't have any of this stuff going on, should she be worried she isnt sexually pleasing her man at all? No. She should be pretty content that her man loves her and enjoys her sexually IN SPITE of his sexual fantasies she might not be able to provide him.

I think it says a lot about character when one can still enjoy a relationship with someone who can't give them everything they want. Good lord people.

A RELATIONSHIP is a hell of a lot more than just her pussy getting pounded by your dick fellas.

 

[dolfette]

no, apparently it's ''sketchy''