You're confusing two different things here, I'm not advocating total honesty about everything in a relationship, I talking about trust.
The two are different, I trust that my partner isn't deceiving me until I'm given irrefutable evidence to the contrary, I don't tell them the total truth all the time, even if I don't actually lie, there are ways of being honest which are kind and not cruel.
The difference between being honest and being trusting is even if I suspect my partner of not telling me the whole truth or not being totally honest with me I trust that because they love me whatever they are not being totally honest about is not the horrible thing my insecurities might otherwise suggest it is.
I trust that whatever they're doing they wouldn't be doing something malevolent or something which if I knew about it would hurt me.
If my partner secretly liked big dicks and I had an average or small one, I'd expect them to be honest about it from the start, if they weren't for whatever reason and I found out about it I'd trust that their love for me was stronger than their attraction to big cocks and that unless they were actually going out and cheating on me that allowing them space to enjoy a fantasy or two had no bearing on me or how satisfied by me they were, ultimately they're with me, if they're willing to give up big cocks for me, then I must be satisfying them in ways that big cocks don't. Even if they are sneaking a few peaks and some sly wanks over here on LPSG.
I really wouldn't start off by trusting that my partner would tell me that he loves big dicks if I had a small one. That's an unreasonable expectation, IMO.
In my case I trust my partner to try and spare my feelings, so discovering something like LPSG is a frequent favored spot would raise reasonable suspicions, IMO, suspicions that might lead to insecurities that I don't already have.
As I wrote a page back, knowing that your partner loves you enough to overlook what that person considers an inadequacy does soothe the pain of being wounded by discovering that your partner thinks that you have an inadequacy, and that love is certainly meaningful when it's that strong, but it's even better if your partner never made you feel inadequate in the first place. Does it not show more love to not only overlook something you feel is an inadequacy, if you love them enough not to let them know that you consider it an inadequacy?
This is beside the point anyway. We weren't discussing a situation in which your partner's penis was actually inadequate, just how you would handle seeing someone with an average sized penis as an LPSG member.
We're really just going around in circles now. I think I see where you are coming from on this subject, but my opinion remains unchanged regarding how I would handle this particular situation. It isn't that I don't understand your point, I just wouldn't handle it the same way that you would.
