New Tax Policy :P

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by johnstone1985, Mar 30, 2003.

  1. johnstone1985

    johnstone1985 New Member

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    Location:
    Glasgow, Scotland
    GOVERNMENT NOTICE

    January 1, 2003
    To: All Male Taxpayers
    From: IRS
    RE: Notice of Increase in Tax Payment Form 1040P

    The only thing the IRS has not yet taxed is your penis. This is
    due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around
    unemployed, 20% of the time it is pissed off, 30% of the time it
    is hard up, and 10% of the time it is in the hole. On top of
    this, it has two dependents and both are nuts.

    Accordingly, starting June 1, 2003 your penis will be taxed
    according to it's size. To determine your category, please
    consult the chart below and confirm this information on page 2,
    section 7, line 3 of your standard 1040 form.

    12-10 inches --Luxury Tax --$50.00
    10-8 inches --Pole Tax --$30.00
    8-6 inches --Privilege Tax --$15.00
    6-4 inches --Nuisance Tax --$5.00

    Please Note:
    -Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a full refund.
    -Males exceeding 12 inches must file for Capital Gains.

    Please do not request an extension

    Sincerely,
    Pecker Checker
    Internal Revenue Services
     
  2. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Does this mean that with Pres. Bush's new tax break we no longer have to lie and say we are shorter on the 1040P so we can save money?

    ;D

    Pecker
     
  3. Imported

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    Finedessert: OH! If you have a good tax man and do a long tax form, you'll be able to take a deduction for such items as Condoms, Lubes, Dildos, etc. etc. etc.

    Theres more than one way to skin a cat. ::)

    Grandpa
     
  4. Imported

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    mentatzps: I wonder if that isn't an april-fool hoax ? ;)
     
  5. Imported

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    7x6andchg: Johnstone-

    Wouldn't that be "Inland Revenue" for you? ;D

    Given the fact that, last time I checked, the UK taxed television sets (but - no commercials, or at least not 10 minutes worth every half-hour), it wouldn't surprise me if this sort of thing came from across the pond....hmmm.

    Just kidding ya...Anglo/Eiro/Scotophile American here.

    Paul / 7x6&C
     
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