New To Topping

newbietop

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So, my boyfriend and I have only ever done oral and stuff. He really wants me to fuck him, and I REALLY want to, but I'm worried that I won't be any good, since it's my first time and all. (We have only ever been with each other...I know, lame.) So I've always come up with an excuse why we can't (not enough time, he's not prepped, etc)

I've seen more porn on it than I want to admit, but how do I know if I'm doing it good for him? Should I get a fleshlight and practice on that or something? (I'm sorry if that is a stupid question.)

I think it would be really hot to make him cum for his first time taking me just by fucking him, you know? That way, he'd really enjoy it, and let me do it a lot! ;)

Please don't make fun of me. I don't have any experience with girls either, so I've literally never fucked anybody. ( i know, I'm 18 and was really sheltered growing up, ok?) And from what I've read online, it's not as simple as sticking it in and moving it back and forth.

Any help would be welcome. Peace.
 

fuckersplit

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First thing you need to do is to relax. It is perfectly normal and you are not lame
For you as a top, you don’t have many things to do. I like to lick the asshole and then put lube on my finger (btw lube is the king) and insert it in his hole. After one finger, there goes another one. After that he is prepared (do not forget that he needs to preaper with douche before sex starts). Put on a condom (STI and HVI are serious) and put pleanty of lube on your dick and more in his ass. After that you place hard dick in front of his hole. Find the right position before you start and when you do it you can slowly start to penetrate him, after that you will move back and forth. That it all
 

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So, my boyfriend and I have only ever done oral and stuff. He really wants me to fuck him, and I REALLY want to, but I'm worried that I won't be any good, since it's my first time and all. (We have only ever been with each other...I know, lame.) So I've always come up with an excuse why we can't (not enough time, he's not prepped, etc)

I've seen more porn on it than I want to admit, but how do I know if I'm doing it good for him? Should I get a fleshlight and practice on that or something? (I'm sorry if that is a stupid question.)

I think it would be really hot to make him cum for his first time taking me just by fucking him, you know? That way, he'd really enjoy it, and let me do it a lot! ;)

Please don't make fun of me. I don't have any experience with girls either, so I've literally never fucked anybody. ( i know, I'm 18 and was really sheltered growing up, ok?) And from what I've read online, it's not as simple as sticking it in and moving it back and forth.

Any help would be welcome. Peace.

Think of this as the next thing you and your b/f do together. Patience and communication is the key.

First - how well if b/f prepared for anal entry? Has he used any toys that are about your size? Has he been fucked before? It matters because some guys, the first time someone goes 'where no man has gone before' there is a tendency to clench and resist, especially if it is feeling painful at first. This is a joint issue - you both have to be aware of and address together.

Assuming he is prepared for you to enter him you will need a good lube - KY is tried and true but there are a lot of lubes available that work well with and without condoms. I'll mention condoms - if you're not taking and pre-exposure treatments to prevent HIV it is a good idea to use them. Ultimately that is what you as a couple need to decide.

If it's his first time as a bottom you both may find it easier to insert comfortably if you are on your back and he lowers himself down on your cock. It gives him control about how much and how fast he is entered and lets him get used to the feeling of being penetrated.

My first time I was on my belly and was entered hard pressed in the mattress - it was rough and hurt like hell, but I had no clue, just knew I wanted to try it. I like topping doggy style but really like my bottom to be on his back facing me when I enter him - the eye to eye contact is hot - very hot.

He will likely need to douche himself before you guys get busy - sometimes you get fecal matter which can be unnerving if you're not prepared for it.

Relax - no one is born performing like a porn star and porn really can create a false set of expectations - forget about those. Be patient and trust each other, listen to each other and know that practice makes perfect. A lot of guys don't immediately get hard while being fucked, some don't get hard at all being fucked, at least the first time. For the guy being fucked the first time, there is a lot to get used to quickly, so be patient - this is something that really does get better and better over time.

Good luck.
 

keenobserver

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First thing you need to do is to relax. It is perfectly normal and you are not lame
For you as a top, you don’t have many things to do. I like to lick the asshole and then put lube on my finger (btw lube is the king) and insert it in his hole. After one finger, there goes another one. After that he is prepared (do not forget that he needs to preaper with douche before sex starts). Put on a condom (STI and HVI are serious) and put pleanty of lube on your dick and more in his ass. After that you place hard dick in front of his hole. Find the right position before you start and when you do it you can slowly start to penetrate him, after that you will move back and forth. That it all

Great point - more lube is better, a lot of lube is better still!
 

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You really only aim at his hole and everthing else is hard to aim because you can’t see it. Don’t worry about his prostate, he will only enjoy your dick.
The whole experience is strange (it was for me) and unbelievable so the feelling will be the same.
I believe you don’t need it then when you are both virgins, but it is good to start with a condom because it needs to be your practice in the future
 

newbietop

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Thanks. Maybe I am overthinking this, but I want it to be good - cause I've read some accounts where its not, and the guys say they don't want to do it again...and I want him to want to do it all the time!

He's never been fucked..he's played with his hole some, but doesn't own a dildo or anything. He's had me put my finger in when I'm sucking him and he likes that, that's why he wants me to full-on fuck him.

And yeah, we've talked about condoms and stuff, and both agreed that we would not use them as long as we were both exclusive - one of the perks of being faithful! He really wants me to shoot in him the first time.
 

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You don’t need to overthink. Many of that bad experiences are beacuse they didn’t listen one another, but when you are in exclusive relationship, that problem isn’t likely to happen. Most pain in sex are because the don’t use lube or use spit (not a good idea)
 
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DarkOverlord

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Is it even possible not to use lube? I can't even get my finger in without lube!
It is but it takes a very experienced bttm who knows his body well. Use lube, use lots of lube. It’s both of your best friend.
Take your time and learn together. His idea of what is good might be different to yours. Enjoy your bodies and learn to love each other in a new way.
 

fuckersplit

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Is it even possible not to use lube? I can't even get my finger in without lube!

It is really important because he will be in pain otherwise because it is to dry. Womens vagina is naturally lubed so for vaginal sex it is not important but for anal it is necessery
 
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cedarizzo

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Things you will need to do:
1) Use Lube and use even more lube. You can never have too much lube for the first time. After that, you can judge how much is needed.
2) Play with his hole to get it to open up. Start with 1 finger, but after a while add another finger and then another. Keep adding lube to help with inserting the fingers.
3) Condom or not is nobody's business but yours and his.
4) When your dick first enters him, go SLOW!!! Let him get used to you inside him. This will get easier after time, but that first time is tough. This is when it is easier for you to lie down on your back and let him lower himself on your dick. He can completely control how far and how fast he takes you.
5) When it is your turn to control the fucking, just aim for his hole. You don't have much choice where it goes (if it hits his prostate). Don't try to be super fast on the in and out. And without knowing how big your dick is, try not to rapidly smash it all in at first. If you are long enough, you are going to be hitting the back anal wall. It can be unpleasant when the top keeps hitting it over and over.
6) Once you learn the depth and tightness, start a nice back and forth motion. I love it when the top pulls all the way out and then pushes it back in, but this will be rough the first time. His hole is still getting used to you.
7) When you are getting close to climax, do what feels best for you. When I top, I usually cum easiest when the bottom is on his back and his legs/ankles are on your shoulders. Watching his face as you fuck him is very hot! When I bottom, that is my favorite position, I love watching the top as he works my hole. I love to play with his nipples, this helps him get off.
8) If it is messy (shit happens), don't freak out. Keep a towel handy to help clean up. The bottom might feel like he has to take a dump, that is quite normal.
9) The most important thing, HAVE FUN!!!

Things the bottom needs to do:
1) Clean very well!!! I rarely douche unless I am going to take a BIG dick/dildo. My partner rarely reaches that far. But it never hurts to clean the ass well and clean the hole too.
2) Make sure that you use plenty of lube on him. He should be able to tell you when it is getting sore or hurts. Just slow down and apply more lube.
3) Try to relax and enjoy. When inserting your dick, he needs to push with his rectum, just like trying to take a dump. This helps open the hole.
4) Another tip, if it is hurting, have him try to clamp down with his rectum on your fingers/dick and hold that for 20 seconds. When he relaxes, you will be able to go in a little further.
5) Have a towel handy (or better yet, have sex on top of the towel). Don't freak out if there is a mess.
6) HAVE FUN!!!

Good luck to both of you. I hope you both find it an enjoyable experience. And it will get easier each time after the first time.
 

newbietop

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So, I thought I would let you helpful guys know how it went.

It went fucking amazing!!! ;)

Can I just say that if I had known how mind-blowing fucking a guy would be, I would have done it looooong ago! It was everything I hoped it would be (well, almost, he didn't cum handsfree, but what are you gonna do, right?)

It was funny, he ended up being more nervous than he let on he was since he's been hounding me to do this for so long. I woulda thought he would be like, "C'mon fuck the hell out of me." Instead he was like, "Go easy at first, ok?" Something happened to me when he said that - it was like I had to protect him, but had to claim him at the same time! I know, right, like I'm so worldly and sooo knew what I was doing, right? But I wasn't gonna let him know I had nerves about it (I did later, but not before!)

And more important than me getting off in the most spectacular way I've ever gotten off, he said that he loved it so much, that he wants to do it again tonight!! Um, yes please! So, can we do it too much? (Semi-serious question! :biggrin:)

So, just, thanks to all you guys who gave advice and stuff. I was worried that you all would think I was just some stupid guy who should know better at his age. But you gave me the confidence to actually do it, and not worry so much. I guess, when I think about it, that guys have been fucking, well, almost everything they could for eons, right? How hard can it be?

At least I didn't disappoint my boyfriend. When he wrapped his legs around my back and pulled me in for a deep kiss while I was balls deep - I knew I was doing something right. I'm so fucking jazzed!
 

keenobserver

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So, I thought I would let you helpful guys know how it went.

It went fucking amazing!!! ;)

Can I just say that if I had known how mind-blowing fucking a guy would be, I would have done it looooong ago! It was everything I hoped it would be (well, almost, he didn't cum handsfree, but what are you gonna do, right?)

It was funny, he ended up being more nervous than he let on he was since he's been hounding me to do this for so long. I woulda thought he would be like, "C'mon fuck the hell out of me." Instead he was like, "Go easy at first, ok?" Something happened to me when he said that - it was like I had to protect him, but had to claim him at the same time! I know, right, like I'm so worldly and sooo knew what I was doing, right? But I wasn't gonna let him know I had nerves about it (I did later, but not before!)

And more important than me getting off in the most spectacular way I've ever gotten off, he said that he loved it so much, that he wants to do it again tonight!! Um, yes please! So, can we do it too much? (Semi-serious question! :biggrin:)

So, just, thanks to all you guys who gave advice and stuff. I was worried that you all would think I was just some stupid guy who should know better at his age. But you gave me the confidence to actually do it, and not worry so much. I guess, when I think about it, that guys have been fucking, well, almost everything they could for eons, right? How hard can it be?

At least I didn't disappoint my boyfriend. When he wrapped his legs around my back and pulled me in for a deep kiss while I was balls deep - I knew I was doing something right. I'm so fucking jazzed!

Thanks for the great update! You've been on my mind - everyone had really great advice but it can be a little overwhelming. Glad it went so well for both of you. You cannot do this too much, practice makes perfect. Go for it!

Asking for information is the mark of a smart person who knows what he doesn't know and wants to move forward. No one knows everything, but we all know something and we all know more when we ask and share.
 
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It is but it takes a very experienced bttm who knows his body well. Use lube, use lots of lube. It’s both of your best friend.
Take your time and learn together. His idea of what is good might be different to yours. Enjoy your bodies and learn to love each other in a new way.
Use lube till you're more experienced n take cock with just spit like i do now
 
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fuckersplit

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So, I thought I would let you helpful guys know how it went.

It went fucking amazing!!! ;)

Can I just say that if I had known how mind-blowing fucking a guy would be, I would have done it looooong ago! It was everything I hoped it would be (well, almost, he didn't cum handsfree, but what are you gonna do, right?)

It was funny, he ended up being more nervous than he let on he was since he's been hounding me to do this for so long. I woulda thought he would be like, "C'mon fuck the hell out of me." Instead he was like, "Go easy at first, ok?" Something happened to me when he said that - it was like I had to protect him, but had to claim him at the same time! I know, right, like I'm so worldly and sooo knew what I was doing, right? But I wasn't gonna let him know I had nerves about it (I did later, but not before!)

And more important than me getting off in the most spectacular way I've ever gotten off, he said that he loved it so much, that he wants to do it again tonight!! Um, yes please! So, can we do it too much? (Semi-serious question! :biggrin:)

So, just, thanks to all you guys who gave advice and stuff. I was worried that you all would think I was just some stupid guy who should know better at his age. But you gave me the confidence to actually do it, and not worry so much. I guess, when I think about it, that guys have been fucking, well, almost everything they could for eons, right? How hard can it be?

At least I didn't disappoint my boyfriend. When he wrapped his legs around my back and pulled me in for a deep kiss while I was balls deep - I knew I was doing something right. I'm so fucking jazzed!

I am so happy everthing was so good
 
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