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Big Dreamer

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Why must everything be an "issue"? Maybe it just does nothing for her. In that case, it probably never will. Talking about it will just likely piss her off. It'd piss me off if I had to listen to constant droning about something I just wasn't interested in.

On the money. Since when do you have to agree with, adore, and be in accordance with every one of your partners traits? If that were the case, then you'd be dating yourself. Boring!!
 

hot-rod

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Got a quick question here been dating this girl for almost a year, we are very serious. I have never gotten a blowjob from her. She said she doesnt like to do it. At first i was kind of okay with it cause the sex was amazing. Now even though the sex is still absolutley amazing all i really want it a Blow job. We fought about it in the beging of our relationship and i was a dick/insensitive about it now if i even mention i she gets really pissed. I mean i absolutley love her, i want to marry her but i dont want our sex life to get fucked up over this. I see it starting already. I always would do anything for her sexually now i dont give a fuck. I have not gone down on her for the past 2 weeks and will never do it again. I do not even want to do anything besides fuck her since she does nothing for me in regards to foreplay. Any ideas?
Don't think she will ever give in...so find a warm mouth away from home on a regular basis. This warm mouth will be happy and so will you?
 

Rick P. Silent

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I used to date a woman with whom I had an awesome sex-life, however, she had a "small mouth" and it was physically difficult for her to get much more than the head of my cock in it (and even then her jaw would ache afterwards).

However, she did give the most AWESOME handjobs (and was not adverse to licking, nibbling, etc.).

I concur, however- if the issue is "icky-ness" you either can work it out or she simply has issues which need be addressed.
 

SoFla8

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Her issue with giving you oral is only the tip of the iceberg. You already resent the fact that she doesnt do it...you're withholding oral from her. Resentment is a hard thing to deal with. What else is she going to refuse to do in the future?

All that isn't important anyways. The worst thing is that you wont bring it up because you're afraid she'll get upset or mad about it. That's a slippery slope pal...if you cant tell her how you really feel or she wont talk about it rationally then why are you considering marriage?! :confused:

good luck!
 

AlteredEgo

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Why're we all coming down hard on this girl for not wanting to give this guy oral sex? I guess we're assuming his cock is awesome, smells great, is easy to lick & suck and his cum tastes like maple syrup from IHOP. My questions are more about YOU, my friend. Ever trimmed your pubes? Maybe consider shaving, not your ENTIRE region, but enough that she's not overwhelmed by a forest of feelings down there? What's your hygiene like? Maybe she just doesn't want to embarrass you. Make sure you are putting forth your "A" game with your body, cock and hygiene and THEN ask her. If she still isn't interested, it's time, wayyyy PAST time actually, to discuss why. But having said that, this should absolutely NOT be a deal breaker, if you're very compatible in other areas in your life. Are you each others' friend? Do you mutually support one another? Can you work effectively as a team, without fighting *too* often? Does the good outbalance the "bad"? There are things more important than sex *gasp*. I can't believe I typed that. But it's true. :)

Right?

I would have written this nearly word for word. I am very concerned that you are not comfortable revisiting a topic that for you isn't closed. You need to talk to her about that issue before you even bring up the sexual issue. And when you bring up the sexual issue make her know that you want a discussion, and NOT an argument.
 

whatsup2

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im completley shaven. i hate body hair so i dont have any. Also, im a hygeine freak, shower at least 2x a day and always before i go to see her. i dont want head all the time, i understand that she dosent really like it so im not going to ask her to do it all the time. But once in a while would be nice, maybe once or twice a month

Why're we all coming down hard on this girl for not wanting to give this guy oral sex? I guess we're assuming his cock is awesome, smells great, is easy to lick & suck and his cum tastes like maple syrup from IHOP. My questions are more about YOU, my friend. Ever trimmed your pubes? Maybe consider shaving, not your ENTIRE region, but enough that she's not overwhelmed by a forest of feelings down there? What's your hygiene like? Maybe she just doesn't want to embarrass you. Make sure you are putting forth your "A" game with your body, cock and hygiene and THEN ask her. If she still isn't interested, it's time, wayyyy PAST time actually, to discuss why. But having said that, this should absolutely NOT be a deal breaker, if you're very compatible in other areas in your life. Are you each others' friend? Do you mutually support one another? Can you work effectively as a team, without fighting *too* often? Does the good outbalance the "bad"? There are things more important than sex *gasp*. I can't believe I typed that. But it's true. :)

Right?
 

bobabooey69

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It is a sucky situation ( no pun intended ).
But if she really were your perfect mate she would at least do it to make you happy.

I once dated this girl that really was into getting her toes sucked. And I am a bit of a germaphobe. So we reached a compensation, I would suck her toes after we took a nice warm shower together ( where I would personally wash her feet..hehe ).

It's all about the give and take I guess. :)
 

ManlyBanisters

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Why're we all coming down hard on this girl for not wanting to give this guy oral sex? I guess we're assuming his cock is awesome, smells great, is easy to lick & suck and his cum tastes like maple syrup from IHOP. My questions are more about YOU, my friend. Ever trimmed your pubes? Maybe consider shaving, not your ENTIRE region, but enough that she's not overwhelmed by a forest of feelings down there? What's your hygiene like? Maybe she just doesn't want to embarrass you. Make sure you are putting forth your "A" game with your body, cock and hygiene and THEN ask her. If she still isn't interested, it's time, wayyyy PAST time actually, to discuss why. But having said that, this should absolutely NOT be a deal breaker, if you're very compatible in other areas in your life. Are you each others' friend? Do you mutually support one another? Can you work effectively as a team, without fighting *too* often? Does the good outbalance the "bad"? There are things more important than sex *gasp*. I can't believe I typed that. But it's true. :)

Right?

Dude - you have just saved me a crapload of typing!

Why must everything be an "issue"? Maybe it just does nothing for her. In that case, it probably never will. Talking about it will just likely piss her off. It'd piss me off if I had to listen to constant droning about something I just wasn't interested in.

Word! Hey, maybe it is the OP's issue that he can't do without oral and he needs to work that out?

Don't think she will ever give in...so find a warm mouth away from home on a regular basis. This warm mouth will be happy and so will you?

Bad, bad advice - and 'give in' - what's that about? Give in?? You make it sound like if she agrees it's going to be:"Nya-nya, I win, now wrap your face around this, bitch!"

Maybe you'd be better off learning to self-suck? [not really serious there OP]
 

ManlyBanisters

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But if she really were your perfect mate she would at least do it to make you happy.

That is just WRONG

Maybe, if he really were her perfect mate he wouldn't ask her do it - to make her happy. (?)

Edit: doing something you are not comfortable with is a bad idea - maybe she could make an effort to get comfortable with it - that's not the same thing!
 

bstexas

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whatsup 2 ... some good comments. the ones about having a good conversation, looking at urself and others make lots of sense. U already acted like u were holding ouut on here ... only fuking here. Do you think THAT'S gonna help the situation? A wall is already building up and it's not gonna get any better. Sorta like married couple who really neded to get divorced think that having a child will help anything. Not really. So talk to her about it. Why she doesn;t like it ... things others have said ... freaked out about putting something in her mouth that may have smegma, cause diseases, or not like jizz? Sounds gross when u think about it. Maybe if you did something like trimming (called manscaping? lol) down there, or better yet, let her help u. Or let her shower with you and wash you. U wash here, visa versa. Get clean and squeaky and let her realize that it is a clean piece. Or even try counseling ... maybe you by urself or both. You both could learn it may be something deeper. who knows unless she talks to you about it. And just realize it may never get better. What are you prepared to do? Break it off with her? Or get some on the side later? Big decision.
 

bobabooey69

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That is just WRONG

Maybe, if he really were her perfect mate he wouldn't ask her do it - to make her happy. (?)

:surprised:
You are right, a person should never be forced to do anything that makes them feel uncomfortable. If my GF said that she really got off in sticking a 10 inch dildo up my ass...I would say "hell no!" and expect her to respect it.:wink:

I guess I could have worded it better. But what I meant to say is that in a serious enough relationship compromises are always a possibility.

It's a bit alien to me as pretty much all my GF's have been quite comfortable in performing oral. Such a strong aversion to this act could have other underlying issues, it could be medical or psychological. In the end, if you care enough about her, maybe you can help her through it.

And if it can't be helped, weigh it out. Is the occasional blowjob worth trading for a woman that is 99% perfect.

........ I am serious!
 

bravesoldier

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A lot of people have their issues, I guess I can understand that, but being denied suck is something I don't think I could live without in a sexual relationship.

Pee can be washed..


Suggest this - The human mouth has quadruple the bacteria and potential for smell than the anus!

Dude I feel for you. She has no idea what she's depriving you of.

bravesoldier~
 

rob_just_rob

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I've only had one (serious) ex who never blew me. Some of the others had difficulty with it, but they were pretty much all game to try.

This particular ex didn't. And it didn't really bother me, mainly because she was by far the kinkiest woman I ever dated. Sex was never boring and I got to try out a lot of fantasies I never expected to try. I was happy to trade blowjobs for forbidden fantasies, and never pressed her on the oral issue.

The point is... assuming you do talk with her, and assuming she still balks at the idea of sucking you, keep talking, and try to find out what other sexual stuff she IS interested in. Share the stuff that turns you on, too. Maybe she'll surprise you.
 

D_Andy_Whorewall

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I've been married for 23 years and in our dating years my wife would blow me every chance she got ! I thought once we got married I was in the promised land !

Wrong ! The only time my oenis finds it's way into her mouth, and this may work for you, is I get her really excited, begin oral on her, then I slide my body around in a 69 position, all the while still tonguing her !

At that point she is so excited she takes my penis for all it's worth !!

If that doesn't work.....You're in the same boat as most of us ! " This ride is permanantly Out Of Order !"
 

HazelGod

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I tend to agree with Dan Savage on this topic: In this day and age, oral sex is de rigeur for both genders. It's to be expected that women will suck dicks and men will lick pussies. It's part of the standard package, not an optional extra. If you happen to find yourself with one that refuses or has some hangup about it, you think of them like a defective product and find yourself one that works properly.

Given the strong undercurrents of resentment I feel in your post, I'd recommend you do just that. Drop her ass. Don't try to change her way of thinking...that's a dead-end road that will only lead to frustration on your part and resentment on hers. It's said that sexual intensity peaks for couples during their first year or two together...after that things decline - sometimes slowly, sometimes not - but they don't return to that peak again. So if you're expecting things to improve over time, you're in for a rude awakening.

It's just my opinion, but there are far too many liberated minds out there already for me to waste time on someone who's carrying around some Victorian taboos.