Ive scouted out some dating sites, payed and free. And things that arent necessarily dating sites, like myspace, and one thing i see alot is "i don't want a player" Damnit, women! Stop that. Its hard enough to get a girl without being a player. But now, if i try to learn the ways of showing confidence and being nice, and talking right, and acting right, then you wont like me because i have learned some skills! You will think that I just want to get in your pants like the other 100k girls pants ive gotten into. And its true! but ive only gotten into 3 pants, and realy, thats not my ultimate goal. But i cant just come out and say that of course, that would be stupid lol. If you don't want a player, the alternative is a guy with maybe some self esteem issues, not too much, maybe alot who knows, but it would show alot more than a player would show. You will have to settle for a guy who doesn't look that great,(and maybe he has potential but is not very good at bringing it out). And is not a pro at being romantic (hell maybe he hasn't a clue). You have to settle for somebody who doesn't always say the right thing at the right time, (all these things players know how to do). I know you want a guy with morals, and long term goals, the ability to take care of himself and you, some maturity, fun, blah blah blah blah. But! how will you ever find out that we have these qualities? I cant get a girl to talk to me now, and im a pretty decent looking guy i think, and i have some confidence, not too much tho. Im trying to learn how to catch eye contact and just try to be more playerish. But if i come off as a player you will ditch me?!!? noooooo!!! its hopeless!! I give up! your all too confident. Maybe ill turn gay. It would be hard seeing as guys look ugly to me. lol. Whats the deal ladies? What do you want a guy to do, when he first starts to talk to you? Should he act like hes hot shit, but then trip on his shoes and fall? Somwhere inbetween player and loser is the key? lol. Im just confused.