Not able to fall in love anymore after...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Thirdlegproduction, Feb 24, 2012.

  1. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
    Gold Member

    Sep 28, 2010
    Likes Received:
    Amsterdam (NH, NL)
    Few years ago I stumbled upon some research about body language and how people interact with each other and how they attract one another.
    My conclusion is that we're still just a bunch of primates no matter how advanced we think we are.

    Since then I haven't been able to fall in love anymore, like I used to be able to feel like this loving puppy if I met a really nice girl but now It's just formulas and techniques that I see and use.

    I am however capable of loving someone and being in love with enough time given but the puppylove and feeling butterflies at the beginning is just gone.

    Now I know that when people grow up they shield themselves from being hurt again and that they try to avoid that feeling but I'm actually looking to experience it again and I'm not afraid of dropping my guard but the feeling has never returned since I gained the knowledge of how and why.

    Not sure what I want to ask here, maybe to ask what your experience has been over the years with the feeling of falling in love.
  2. D_Carl_Colossal

    D_Carl_Colossal New Member

    Apr 18, 2011
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    So despite chinese food's ability to wreak havoc on the body, I still eat it. Appropriately enough, the fortune cookie told me something that I think applies to this scenario. It said, "With age comes great self discovery." :p

    Correct me if I'm wrong, but your problem is that you feel like the magic & whimsy has been sucked dry out of your pursuit of a gf-- or like a natural connection is less than or only as effective at attracting mates as platitudinous human evolutionary mating gesticulation.

    I'm no Dr. Phil, but maybe it's harder for you to regain that "butterfly" feeling because experience has taught you that, in the end, the relationship that spawns may be fleeting at best? Maybe it's just that you've grown to favor a more personal relationship over one driven purely on appearance. That'd naturally delay the "love at first sight" phenom.

    Personally, I'm one that favors personality.

    Just my 2 cents I guess. :p
  3. tominatlanta

    tominatlanta New Member

    Oct 30, 2004
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    Atlanta, GA
    Wasn't there a really good movie about this single subject about 5-8 years ago? There was a guy, who was very intelligent and a scientist, or son of a scientist, who learned from his father about the chemical/neurological reactions that make human mammals feel romantic love. That is, he couldn't SAY to his girl friend that he loved her because it sort of spooked him - the biology behind it, that is. He did love women and had a sex drive, but his girlfriend wanted him to say there was "magic' between them. She leaves him for a while, and then he decides he just NEEDS to say what she wants to hear. It had a happy ending.

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