Not having Sex bums my boyfriend out
- Thread starter MissKay
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helgaleena
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helgaleena
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Oh galaxus, ALL sex is good and holy. It doesn't have to be fireworks every single time. That would be boring! Perhaps you are having too much of it and need a hobby as well. How about reading bedtime stories?
Really? Shit.I meant everything I said, but I might have tempered it just a bit had I known that.
nah, he needs to read what you have to say, just the way you said it.
*hugs the wise and tremendously sexy man*
eta: MissKay.. check out some of the threads ya man has started. could be eye opening.
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rawbone8
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Not to thread jack, but there are alternatives to conventional marriage and monogamy IF BOTH partners are fully desiring opening their relationship to include others in a safe, ethical way. It's a minefield of hurt if it isn't an equally desired solution. The relationship has to be strong and mature to begin with, and jealousy-free. This scenario sure wouldn't fix a dysfunctional one.
I wouldn't enter into a marriage and monogamy if I didn't think I could manage to stick to it. Better to be with partners who feel the same way and aren't chafing in the harness, so to speak. Monogamy is not for everyone.
I wouldn't enter into a marriage and monogamy if I didn't think I could manage to stick to it. Better to be with partners who feel the same way and aren't chafing in the harness, so to speak. Monogamy is not for everyone.
I agree with the crutch anology
Sex is viewed even in loving realtonship very differntly. Peopel assume men can detach sex as an act were as women can not. Which is not all the case. its a generalation. Again putting a label on what we should think.
Perhaps your bf has attached intimacy to an orgasm. Many women tend to do this. When he is not, he then perhaps goes into the disconnected phase( again which many insecure women have a habit of doing)
Depression he probably has and uses sex or the endorphine high he gets from his orgasms to self medicate. When in reality he is having depression issues and misdirecting his afections as a self cure.
I would see a therapist and learn how to have dialog with him and see why he feels needs to have sex. Is it horniness? is it habit? is it a need for intimacy? If he can verblize why..then perhaps he can find other ways besides sex to achieve said results and be happy( both happier)
Sex is viewed even in loving realtonship very differntly. Peopel assume men can detach sex as an act were as women can not. Which is not all the case. its a generalation. Again putting a label on what we should think.
Perhaps your bf has attached intimacy to an orgasm. Many women tend to do this. When he is not, he then perhaps goes into the disconnected phase( again which many insecure women have a habit of doing)
Depression he probably has and uses sex or the endorphine high he gets from his orgasms to self medicate. When in reality he is having depression issues and misdirecting his afections as a self cure.
I would see a therapist and learn how to have dialog with him and see why he feels needs to have sex. Is it horniness? is it habit? is it a need for intimacy? If he can verblize why..then perhaps he can find other ways besides sex to achieve said results and be happy( both happier)
Your husband being bummed out all the time over something he knows he'll get some point soon (like later that night). Are you really sure it's sex? or is that an assumption? It's almost not feasible (still anything's possible)...im surprised at how so many are quick to judge here...Im holding back till i hear the rest..cause his actions/feelings sound somewhat comparable to a toddler the way you put it...Also it's not unusual for a guy to be bummed out all the time if he's doin what he supposed to do (support his family mainly) its kinda how the game goes there highs a lows...but still i don't think its as simple as he doesnt get sex he gets bummed knowing his kid is awake, not buyin that....
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Sounds like he's very young and/or immature. Even those of us with a high sex drive must get around to accepting that life is complex and it sounds like you are doing everything in your power to placate his needs. Just the fact that you are here asking advice is a great gesture that you care and are concerned for his happiness. As far as I can tell, he's a very lucky man with some major growing up to do.
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