Not Horny. :(

theprinceofdorks

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Hi I've been in a relationship with a great guy for about 6 years now. He loves sex. If he didnt have to sleep, or work, sex is all he would be doing. With me no less, because he's a gentleman like that :biggrin1:.

Problem is, my entire life I've had a very low sex drive. I know its not the most common thing for a 24 year old gay man to have. Sometimes I completely forget about sex or jerking off for weeks at a time. My bf always reminds me lol. Any ideas on what I could do to increase my sex drive? Anything at all would be appreciated.
 

rimmer9

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Not worry about to start with. Not everyone is the same and you can't force these things. Make sure you are tactile with each other, just cuddling can very often unexpectedly lead to something else.
 

B_Italian1

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That is unusual for a 24 year old. Have you had a physical exam lately? Had all your blood tests done? If not, you should. And if you're on any prescriptions they can affect your sex drive. Are you eating a well balanced diet? Sleeping enough? Are you stressed out? Depression? Anxiety?
Just some things to consider.
 

visualalert

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I agree w/Italian1...get a physical with standard bloodwork and specifically ask the doc to run a testosterone test. I had this done a few years ago but I'd expect my sex drive to be slowing down @ my age. At 24 I could not keep that bad boy down. 'Course at 24 I never bothered to go to a doc either. Give it a try and don't be embarrassed to tell the doc anything and everything...believe me, they have heard it all and then some.
 

theprinceofdorks

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I am eating a pretty well balanced diet. I exercise, I sleep at least 8 hours a night. I am not stressed or on any prescription pills. Just never really had a big sex drive.

I did have a physical with a blood exam just to make sure everything was okay, though I didn't specifically ask for them to test my testosterone levels.

Cuddling often does lead to other things. I really enjoy a good massage, which can mostly lead to sex, but sometimes I pass out I get so relaxed.

I try to have sex at least once a week. I've found that if I edge myself for a while and don't finish then I'm much more in the mood than if I just don't pay attention to my sex drive at all. But sometimes I finish instead of just edging, which is not useful at all lol.

My relationship is working well as it is I just wish I could do more for him, he does so much for me. Maybe I will go get a testosterone test. But it would be a lie if I said I wasn't going to be embarressed.
 

viking1

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Do see an Andrologist just to be sure there is no hormone problem. Some people just don't have much sex drive, and some have extreme sex drives.
It's just another part of what makes each of us unique.
 

B_Italian1

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Maybe I will go get a testosterone test. But it would be a lie if I said I wasn't going to be embarressed.

You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Doctors are used to that stuff.

Do see an Andrologist just to be sure there is no hormone problem. Some people just don't have much sex drive, and some have extreme sex drives.
It's just another part of what makes each of us unique.

Right. :fing02:
 

B_RedDude

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No suggestions right now...but consider how lucky you are to have a guy who is a horny bastard for a boyfriend after six years who still loves you and is faithful even though you're not another horny bastard; says that despite his sex drive, there is something more to the relationship for him, and for you, besides sex [Not that sex is a bad thing!]

Hi I've been in a relationship with a great guy for about 6 years now. He loves sex. If he didnt have to sleep, or work, sex is all he would be doing. With me no less, because he's a gentleman like that :biggrin1:.

Problem is, my entire life I've had a very low sex drive. I know its not the most common thing for a 24 year old gay man to have. Sometimes I completely forget about sex or jerking off for weeks at a time. My bf always reminds me lol. Any ideas on what I could do to increase my sex drive? Anything at all would be appreciated.
 

theprinceofdorks

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Sorry about that. I really do consider us lucky. We really do genuinely enjoy each other. Just wish that sometimes I had the urge to enjoy him a little bit more. :rolleyes:

No suggestions right now...but consider how lucky you are to have a guy who is a horny bastard for a boyfriend after six years who still loves you and is faithful even though you're not another horny bastard; says that despite his sex drive, there is something more to the relationship for him, and for you, besides sex [Not that sex is a bad thing!]
 

goodwood

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Nicely said Redboy.
Prince...while I am not able to relate to having a low sex drive, I am able to relate to the fact that you desire to please your partner and that is admirable. You are a very fortunate guy that he has been with you for six years and knows and loves you for who you are (and you him). You are worlds ahead of most couples.
Have you thought about experimenting with Viagra or some such pill when the mood strikes? Just a thought.
 

jason_els

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Designed the T-shirt.

Don't go to your regular doctor for these kinds of tests. Andrologists are exceptionally difficult to find though if you can find one, get one. Otherwise seek an endocrinologist as they know to test for bound AND free testosterone. Both are very important.

Testosterone should be tested first thing in the morning. No other blood test will indicate there's a problem and testosterone is NOT a routine panel.

Get a consult and see what's going on just to be sure.