Not sexual!!????

[freeballer24]

Hey everyone!
I'm a 24 year old blk male, I've been in four relationships, because I only like relationships, I 've tried one night stands but they don't work for me. I like to feel connected to someone before I have sex with them. Anyways, I been with my current boyfriend for 1 year and 7 months and we live together. When we first started dating we would have sex 3 times a day or more. for the past 7-8 months he only wants to have sex 1 time a week, because he claims he's not sexual like that. He claim he's tired, or that we do so much that we don't have the time. He like to hangout with friends every night, and drink most of the time, but says he's tired???

I thought it could have been because he was cheating, but there is no signs of cheat, I've been through his phone and everything else trying to see if maybe he is cheating on me, NOTHING!

I've never had this problem with anyone before, And I'm young, I'm cute I get hit on just walking through the store by other guys when I'm with him. I just can't understand this. Any advice on how to deal with this???

Thanks everyone:smile:

 

[Explorer]

Could it be that the relationship may need a boost? You two are living together, seeing eachother day and night, the relationship may have grown stale and you need to inject some life via change of routine.

My bf and I have been together for over a year and I frequently inject some spice in the relationship; unexpected romantic evenings at home, weekends at our favorite hotel, alternate sexual identities (I have 4, lol...). Think of things to spice it up and be grateful he's not cheating!

 

[nudeyorker]

First, the most important thing is communication between the two of you. Let him know how you feel and how the lack of sexual activity is a concern. Ask him candidly if there is something bothering him (problems with work, family or health) all of these issues can wreck havoc on a healthy libido.
Don't put pressure on him; just take the time to rediscover each other and try some new things that you may not have discussed with each other before.

 

[Symphonic]

He might just not need sex. It happens.

 

[TheRam]

Is he depressed?

 

[freeballer24]

well I talked to him today, and he said sex and spending time alone with me is a priority to him yet. He says he's not depressed and nothing is wrong as far as health etc.

 

[nudeyorker]

well I talked to him today, and he said sex and spending time alone with me is a priority to him yet. He says he's not depressed and nothing is wrong as far as health etc.

Have to ask if it was a typo. Is or is not a priority? If he said sex and spending time alone with you is not a priority, then you need to move on. If he said sex and spending time alone with you is a priority than you both will work this out!

 

[freeballer24]

sorry! he said it isn't a priority yet.

 

[DiscoBoy]

sorry! he said it isn't a priority yet.

And it's been a year and 7 months?

 

[Principessa]

sorry! he said it isn't a priority yet.

Leave, leave him now. Or kick him out or whatever, but if you are his bf and sex with you is not a priority right now, then it never will be.:frown1:

 

[PornForPatric]

Leave, leave him now. Or kick him out or whatever, but if you are his bf and sex with you is not a priority right now, then it never will be.:frown1:

I second that emotion!

Well, tell him that living in a sexless relationship isn't a priority to you...yet. Kick him out, break it off or just move him into the spare bedroom. Do whatever you must, but staying with that kind of jerk is a dead end street.

 

[freeballer24]

Thanks for all the advice...

 

[Symphonic]

Leave, leave him now. Or kick him out or whatever, but if you are his bf and sex with you is not a priority right now, then it never will be.:frown1:

While I don't agree with this since people do have phases and there could be underlying trust issues he lies about it so... Yeah it's probably best to consider that an option.