not supportive or just need to get out of fantasy land?? please answer

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by the_1homie, Dec 4, 2007.

  1. the_1homie

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    ok something i dont understand when a women asks a question in a post and gets realstic honest answers they dont want to hear they say your not being supportive (example tell them they are wrong when they are wrong but want to be told they are right) so why ask the question if you just want a yes man per say ?(maybe to just hear the yes you want as opposed to the true answer of no to make themselves feel better??) why so not willingly to hear honest truth (i can understand the little white lies of if she asks do i look fat in this dress of course you always say no if you say yes then their egos maybe taken down and they'd be hurt showing they really didnt want a honest answer ,just wanting to be reassured,is it a insecurity thing??) but if you women can shed some light on this i'd appreciate it
     
  2. Osiris

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    That is a tough one homie, but you have two types of women on this forum. The honest and secure and those who may not know what they are here looking for.

    The honest and secure women are usually the long standing members of the forum (wldhoney, hotmilf, SpoiledPrincess, snoozan, NJQT, naughty, cigarbabe, Think_Kink, etc.) These women are very strong about their opinions, but not foolish about them. They can be very eloquent with how they accept disagreement and how they discuss it. The downside for these women is that often a troll will put in some input and then try to twist it this way or that to make them look wishy washy. When that happens you truly find out just how strong these women are.

    The women that are unsure of why they are here feel attacked and react that way probably because it can overwhelming to have everyone disagree with you on something. Even though they asked it, maybe they did expect people to agree. However once faced with overwhelming disagreement, it can be daunting and then they get defensive. With newer mebers (male and female) tact is best. The older members are very vocal, have strong opinions and are very open and honest.

    The best thing I can say to any women joining this forum is that it isn't all about sex and don't jump to offense too quickly. You will find this forum a place of help and nurturing if you take responses in the right frame of mind.
     
  3. B_tallbig

    B_tallbig New Member

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    Short answer: Many woman are very complicated , dont even try to understand them , just play along.
     
  4. 4x4

    4x4 New Member

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    many=all and AMEN ;)

    Ladies please don't get upset, if you think about it, it is a complement.
     
  5. str82fcuk

    str82fcuk Member

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    personally I've always had an easier time understanding women than men (yeah that's a bit queer I know) ...

    anyway let us just say that in the world in general, and not on this forum, some people might want to convince themselves that they are doing the right thing, and they feel that asking for someone else's opinion will help them to feel that they have done the right thing, so they then therefore ask for someone else's opinion, and they then therefore feel more assured that they have done the right thing ... (and if you think I'm missing anything here then you are thinking too much and not feeling enough :rolleyes: )

    of course it would be nice if you could actually get a real woman to post anything on this thread :biggrin1:
     
  6. 36DD

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    You know for a cute wookie you sure say some not so cute things and I am going to come on over there and beat your little cute wookie ass...To "play along" is just as offensive as "yes dear, you're right". AAAUUUUGGGHHHH! Don't take it personally my dear wookie, just try to have an open mind where women are concerned...all people are complicated but they are also individuals.:biggrin1:
     
  7. Osiris

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    Guys? Have you met yet another of the strong opinionated women of the forum? I'd introduce you to 36 DD, but I think she has that covered already. :wink:
     
  8. B_DEATHbyCARROT

    B_DEATHbyCARROT New Member

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    Not a woman, but I know in personal relationships you can be supportive and oppose the other person at the same time. Hell sometimes opposing them is the supportive thing to do. It has more to do with how you do things than what you are doing 99% of the time in my experience with the opposite sex. Sorry for the vague answer but your question was kinda vague too...
     
  9. IntoxicatingToxin

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    Hmm....

    What about the men who assume we want answers when we never asked for any? I'm not saying that you (the OP) are that way, but to turn the tables for a minute, there have been several occasions where a woman has posted a thread more for venting purposes than anything, and men pop up out of nowhere telling her how to solve the problems when she never asked for help in the first place.
     
  10. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    I would assume you are not married... nor do you have a gf if you think this way.
     
  11. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Wishy washy is right. It's unwise to try and attack the long term members opinions. With long term standing comes acceptance irregardless of the topic at hand. For example: I have an obsession with my gay best friend... one of the members thinks I'm looney (in a joking way) but will defend me if someone were to challenge me on it.

    As well for the most part if one of the long standing members feels attacked rest assured that the rest of the girls will generally chime in to attack the attacker. It's hard to go candid on a site such as this where we are sought after for being real. We've bonded together and are not afraid to share our opinions.
    Defense is usually how newbies react. It only (well for me personally) adds fuel to the flame. My sense of how much fun it is to toy with people goes into over drive. If a newbie tries to personally attack long standing members then all hell will break loose. That is where you get the vocalized reactions. If we think your idea sucks, we'll tell you. If we think that your view on something is wrong, we will tell you. That's kinda just how it is, you can't throw yourself into a new place such as this and expect people to adore you and agree with everything you say.. that's just life.

    And don't attack long standing members if you want to not be ripped apart. With being here for extended periods of time comes a sense of security within the community. We don't like that sense of security to be disturbed, so expect some thrash back if you decide to throw a few uncalled for punches at us when we don't like your brilliant idea.
     
  12. SpoiledPrincess

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    It's got support in it's title, maybe some of the people who ask for answers don't want honest answers, they want confirmation of what they already thought. A lot of the time when someone asks for advice they've already decided what they're going to do, they merely want someone to voice the thoughts they had.
     
  13. str82fcuk

    str82fcuk Member

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    Quite so !
     
  14. viking1

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    Exactly, and when they don't get that? Well, it's time to call the fire dept...
     
  15. rob_just_rob

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    It's called using judgment, and being tactful. And that applies to requests for advice from anyone, men or women.
     
  16. JC8

    JC8 Member

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    Irregardless isn't a word.
     
  17. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Gee that's funny because firefox seemed to think so.. and so did dictionary.com
     
  18. str82fcuk

    str82fcuk Member

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    'Irregardless' is most certainly a word. A poor little inbred incestuous word perhaps, but a word nevertheless. Anyway it is not a word I would ever choose to use unless I wanted to make a sarcastic pun or double entendre ...

    to wit ...

    "Some people ask for help irregardlessly"

    Oh Shit ! I failed to use that word that isn't a word but it's all okay because I think I just invented a new word instead ! Fuck I love English ! I swear coining a bunch of cunning linguistic cants can be so much more fun than boning up on a bunch of stunted .....

    anyway, seriously though, trying to communicate with some people is sometimes just a waste of time, so might as well just watch the porn ....

    and regarding that sad setup, it sounds pretty loveless on both sides ... why on earth would both parties continue to put up with and produce such pretence without any regard for the overpowering stench of putrefaction in the irrelationship
     
  19. SpoiledPrincess

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    I'm always inventing words, English has an inbuilt facility for nonce words.

    oh, nonce means just for the once, nothing to do with that other nonce which I believe has something to do with prison.
     
  20. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Likely going back to the Germanic roots of the language. German is notorious for inventing words on the fly; particularly those horrible compound nouns.

    Ueberseedeutschlehrerinternetmailinglistenfragenstellundantwortkundigen anyone?

    translation:

    People well versed in asking questions and supplying answers on the Internet Mailing List of German teachers abroad
     
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