Not typical size question i promise

[JustinJay35]

Hey there. I promise before I get started on my question that this isn't your typical guy size question. Ok, so I'm with this woman who has had a decent amount of sexual partners before which for the record doesn't bother me a bit I like that she's experienced..anyways we have been together for a few years and a couple of months ago took a two month break and we both had sex with one other person. During our relationship before the break and each of us having a new experience we had a lot of what I could call on my end great sex. And I mean great. The only thing like a lot of women is that she has only orgasmed from actual sex like twice out of probably 500 or so times we have had sex. To get her to orgasm during sex we normally use a bullet vibe on her clit. The other way we would get her to orgasm is through something we found out accidentally which is from a cyberskin life like dildo that is larger than I am in mainly girth and about an inch and a half in length. I have asked not out of insecurities but out of wanting to please her why it's very easy for her to have not one but multiple orgasm from the toy and she said to be honest that it makes her feel "full" and hits spots easily. She then said she's happy with me though and assured me things are fine. Well, a couple of months ago after we were discussing sex that we had during our break she told me that she learned that she can have "different but more powerful multiple orgasm from sex alone". I of course again with no jealousy or any bad feelings asked why and how could we do that. She asked if I was sure I wanted to know and I said yes. She then told me "ok here it goes. The guy I was with, his penis was thicker than yours and a little longer but it wasn't the length it's that it was a real penis not a dildo and it made me feel" filled up" and I started having really intense sensations then I would cum, then it would build up again about every 5 minutes ". I then said well you and I would have sex for like 20 mins and that never happened. Why? She then told me" to be honest it wasn't because it was him or that I loved him or that he was even that attractive, I know you'll look different at me but his penis just hits spots and gave me a tugging fullness that I am not used to and the last time I felt that was with an ex years ago that was a little under his size so I kinda forgot what it felt like. And to be honest it was physically great but I love you and if I want that type of sensation we have toys"

So where am I going with this? First I don't hold it against her for how it made her feel or resent or look at her different for her experience. I'm also not really insecure more than I think any other dude is. What my question is, is... Is this something that women have experienced before and also how big of a difference in physical pleasure is there really and also what are some things I can do to keep her happy.

Not to sound like a typical size thread but for the record I'm 6" long and about 5" in girth when I'm extremely aroused but again not thinking I'm small but I guess wondering if a woman was with my size for years then experienced what she did if it really changes her expectations as far as physical pleasure. Please only serious responses no "go read other size thread" replies please as I am already outside my comfort zone by posting this.

 

[MickeyLee]

You totally asked the typical size question *sigh*

 

[JustinJay35]

You totally asked the typical size question *sigh*

Did I really? I thought with explaining the back story a little it wouldn't be that way or come off that way. Damn

 

[MickeyLee]

No matter how many syllables you throw at it.. a dick size question is a dick size question

 

[AlteredEgo]

Another size issue but not typical

OP must not have EVER read the forum. He keeps thinking his size questions are unusual. I'm sure @Fade will show him just how typical if she has time.

Class, repeat after me:

Every single gatt-damn' vagina is different, AND attached to an individual with their own nerve endings and preferences.

What that means is even if vaginal dimensions are the same, what feels amazingly good or necessary to one woman might feel insubstantial or just ordinary to another. We are not a hive mind.

There's more.

Not all women are even orgasmic, let alone able to have multiple orgasms. I have one orgasm in about 20-30 minutes NO MATTER WHAT. And sizes? Oh, I've had them all. You know what? I enjoyed just about all, too. No, one man didn't ever lead me to expecting to feel the same with another. Not ever. It's not experiences, but my own body that has dictated to me what I need to feel to be satisfied.

Is the size of your erection too small to give her multiple orgasms? She already told you it is. That's a done deal. What you do with that information is up to you. You don't need strangers for this. Your bits and her bits are not well matched. It's an average dick and a larger than average vagina, or one that needs to expand larger to get to vaginal climax. That doesn't mean anything more than the two of you decide it does. Sounds to me like she'd rather have all her fun times with you, no matter how different her fun times were with anyone else. She also told you what to do to keep her happy. Break out the toys from time to time, and keep being you.

Your problem is two-fold. First, you think you have to be special, different, unique. You aren't. No one has told you this before, I guess, but you're typical. Guess what? That's great! Most people are. There will be some things about you that will be just uniquely you. But generally, you're an average dude. Awesome. You're in good company. The second thing is related to your ego. You need it stroked by your partner's orgasms. That's all on you, and not your partner, who clearly doesn't measure pleasure strictly in orgasms. For the record, neither do I. And when an orgasm is going to be important to me, I don't care how I get there, as long as my partner is along for the ride.

This better not be SPH manipulation. I'm tired of that shit.

 

[JustinJay35]

Ok fine, then it's a dick size question on a dick related site and I'm not a woman so I'm just trying to understand this is all. Unfortunately us guys don't get an idea of how we look or are size wise like like women with breasts as we aren't as "exposed" and even if the breast size comparison were to be used breasts don't have a direct impact on physical sex like a man's penis does. This is the first time I've had a woman in my life be like straight up, another dudes penis felt better but wants to be with me so I'm asking here as to not hound her with questions and make her feel badgers or embarrassed by her experience. But as a guy I'm just trying to understand from a woman's perspective how much difference these things make and also why she had such a hard time being honest about it. That's all.

 

[JustinJay35]

I

Ok fine, then it's a dick size question on a dick related site and I'm not a woman so I'm just trying to understand this is all. Unfortunately us guys don't get an idea of how we look or are size wise like like women with breasts as we aren't as "exposed" and even if the breast size comparison were to be used breasts don't have a direct impact on physical sex like a man's penis does. This is the first time I've had a woman in my life be like straight up, another dudes penis felt better but wants to be with me so I'm asking here as to not hound her with questions and make her feel badgers or embarrassed by her experience. But as a guy I'm just trying to understand from a woman's perspective how much difference these things make and also why she had such a hard time being honest about it. That's all.

Sorry just posted this reply as another reply was being posted. Just now saw the responses

 

[JustinJay35]

What's SPH manipulation? I'm being honest about the situation as uncomfortable as it is to bring up, I'm not lying about it. Why would I? I'm confused

 

[918177]

Don't have a hive mind.

Don't have a hive vagina.

Maybe your just a lousy fuck.

 

[JustinJay35]

Maybe, who knows She said physically she had a better time with other dude so maybe. I don't last forever so I dunno. I'm not as experienced as she is so I dunno. All I know is she said honestly that it was better on a purely physical level due to strictly the penis he had. For a guy it's hard to understand and it's pretty personal It's not an ego thing like I must be the best she's ever had. It's not like that. I just kinda feel bad and want her to be happy is all and feel bad that she felt like she couldn't tell me right fht away

 

[MickeyLee]

There are penis variable other than size. The biggest one that I can personally say has an effect on orgasm is an upward curve. My peen experience is limited, I mostly have dildos to compare to. Most dildos are straight, I guess to give a better impression of size. During my more queer days, I never cared much for vaginal penetration with anything other than fingers. A straight shaft doesn't do it for me. The boy's curved cock, on the other hand, hits all the good spots. I adore PIV sex with him, experiencing multiple orgasms every time.

There is also uncut status to be looked at. The boy's foreskin creates a sweet, frictionless glide on penetration that I love. Compared to straight dildos with no skin slide action, which actually felt very irritating to the vaginal intros, an uncut penis led to much better sex and heaps of orgasms. I would argue the main difference is the feelings I have for the boy, but you seem focused on the penis.

In your OP you claimed to not be insecure or bothered by her outside experience.. clearly, you are both. She's told you she is happy with you, your penis and y'all smexy times. You have two choices.. be neurotic and insecure and choose to believe she is lying to you. Or, trust the woman you claim to love and get over your bullshit. The only thing wrong is your attitude.

ETA: You won't get the answers from the women here. We've all answered the question a million times. Usually, we get called liars. Either because we don't want to seem shallow, or we're trying to spare someone's, random interwebz strangers, feelings. It's a no-win.

 

[JustinJay35]

Ok no really I know that a lot of guys if not most are all wrapped up in their ego shit. Let me try to better explain maybe. Ok, so what happened, happened..again not insecure because there's nothing to be insecure over. Like the typical.. Was the guy bigger, better, etc. Those questions were answered already without me asking. She told me point blank yeah it was physically better cause the size matched me better. In so many words.

Ok so that part is done. Where my questions are, is, how much of a difference does this typically make (I know people are different so generally) and then I'm wanting to know from women that have experienced the same if it was difficult going back to where I'm at after that experience. Cause even though she says I'm fine and I believe her, I'm not trying to get fucked around on, or, her living her live not satisfied. I guess what did it for me was when she said "honestly if we took his penis and put it on you our sex life would be phenomenal) And finally after all that she admitted to knowing I was thin compared to her past experiences and was unsatisfied for years in that particular department but could never tell me. Those are the things I'm trying to get clarity on.

 

[deleted924715]

...

 

[693987]

Serious, what size do you prefer? | LPSG

Minimum and maximum penis size | LPSG

Does size matter | LPSG

Which the opinion about size cock? | LPSG

Do women actually like big size? | LPSG

Adjusting his cock to make it the size you want. | LPSG

How does an average size feels after a big one? | LPSG

Size | LPSG

size | LPSG

I need to know my chances-size-wise | LPSG

Honest Answer on size difference. | LPSG

What is the minimum acceptable size for you? | LPSG

How Important is Size? | LPSG

Penis size | LPSG

i wanna ask a woman the favourite range size | LPSG

Size | LPSG

Etc

 

[JustinJay35]

...

By the way im not out to get offended, call anyone egotistical or a lying type of person. That just ain't me. On the contrary I'm asking for honest no bullshit ideas, experiences and advice.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

My answer..

You think about dick size about ten thousand more times as often as I do.

For once, I am going to make an assumption that is likely way too bold. ALL MEN think about dick size about ten thousand times more often than I do.

Size isn't a factor when it comes to sensation.

In fact, for many women, the size of HER bits is the factor that matters when it comes to physical pleasure. The distance between the clit and the piss-hole makes all the difference in the world.

 

[JustinJay35]

Ok thanks for the perspective and advice from a woman. That helped a ton more than "use the search button"

 

[AlteredEgo]

why she had such a hard time being honest about it. That's all.

I won't assume we are from the same culture. I'm a US citizen, and have been socialized to avoid hurting anyone's feelings, and moreover, to avoid triggering men to feel ashamed of their genitals. If she and I are from the same culture, there ya go.

What's SPH manipulation? I'm being honest about the situation as uncomfortable as it is to bring up, I'm not lying about it. Why would I? I'm confused

Dudes with average and small dicks who have fantasies about being 'bested' by another man with bigger tackle show up here regularly and pawn off their fantasies as reality. It is manipulative and a waste of fucking time.

By the way im not out to get offended, call anyone egotistical or a lying type of person. That just ain't me. On the contrary I'm asking for honest no bullshit ideas, experiences and advice.

And I gave you precisely that. The fact is, only she can answer your questions. You need HER perspective, not any other woman's. That's the honest truth. I told you how different sizes impact me. She may feel completely differently, and we'd both be right.

Cause even though she says I'm fine and I believe her, I'm not trying to get fucked around on, or, her living her live not satisfied.

You don't believe her. Anything you say to the contrary is a lie you are telling yourself, just like the like that you don't feel insecure about this. I think if you could be more honest with yourself, you could manage this situation better.

Now you're going to contradict me. Right?

Here's the thing. If you believed her, you'd have already moved on, and not be concerned in the least that she'll cheat or be unsatisfied. If you were not feeling insecure, you'd believe her. You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me.

I'd believe you about your ego, by the way, if you didn't have the constant need to assure we strangers here that you and your (basically the same as everyone else's) queries are anything other than typical. It's unnecessary, so other than your own ego, there would be no point to it.

Again. The path to confidence and coping is bald honesty with yourself, first and foremost. Before that, I promise you will continue to be more vulnerable to both pain and manipulation than you ought to be.

That's free wisdom on ohe internet though. Take it or leave it. Doesn't impact my life one jot, I just like to help.

 

[918177]

I'm NOT a US citizen and I don't give a fuck about your feelings.

Deal with it.

 

[JustinJay35]

Altered ego, just wanted to let you know that I read your post twice and actually take no 9ffense to any of it. Actually it helped aot and put a lot of the way I was viewing the situation into perspective. Thanks