Nudism in General

Discussion in 'Underwear, Clothing, and Appearance Issues' started by B_thickjohnny, Nov 3, 2011.

  1. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    I've been a nudist for probably 20 something years. I'm naked at home all the time and enjoy going to nudist resorts, beaches, events etc if/when in my area. Since moving back to the US, I am living on a budget and looking for a room mate situation. Of course I'd like a nudist or nudist friendly roommate but have trouble broaching the subject. One guy I chatted with on line said he'll be moving to ATL after the first of the year and is a pure nudist and would also like to have a nudist roomie. Problem is, he and others seem to link sex to nudism. At least it sort of came across that way. I mean, his profile on true nudists was vanilla in every way but when he sent me pictures they were of him and erections, cock rings etc. While that defo doesnot offend me, I think if you're looking for a genuine nudist room mate you don't send those kind of personal photos.

    I found a roommate in any case and move in next week. We met on a run of the mill roommate site. He's also gay, mid 40s, professional. I asked about his level of comfort with being in my boxers around the house and he said he didn't care so long as when guests come over I dress - of course! I didn't say anything about being a nudist. He then asked me about my comfort level sharing the one and only bathroom in his house. I really don't care who walks in and out so long as it's not when I'm sitting on the can.

    So I wonder if he'll eventually be ok if I walk around naked?

    Has anyone any thoughts on this? How do you keep this on the level and not reduce it to something sexual? Any nudists out there who have dealt with this? If so, how?

    Thanks.
     
  2. LittleDicky

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    A very similar question came up on a nudist site that I frequent.

    A guy accepted the invitation to move in with a girl as roomies -- and failed to mention his preference for casual nudity. She was not a nudist. He wondered how to bring up the subject.

    The overwhelming consensus was that this should have been discussed BEFORE he accepted the living arrangement. It's her place. Her rules.

    Certainly, he should be able to be nude in his room as much as he likes, but he can't expect to have the run of the house (which he wanted) without clearing this with her.

    We're talking non-sexual nudity here, so it makes no difference that his was a guy/girl situation.

    People have their boundaries/hang ups. This just isn't something you spring on people.

     
    #2 LittleDicky, Nov 3, 2011
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2011
  3. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    I totally agree. I didn't know how to bring it up so I said do you mind me being in my boxers whenever I'm home. He said no problem then asked about the sharing of the bathroom. I figure that at some point we'll both be in the very small bathroom and one of us will be getting in or out of the shower. That will open that door, I think. I mean, I won't try to get dressed while I'm standing there and I won't do any sort of towel dance. That's just nonsense.

    So the jury is still out....
     
  4. LittleDicky

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    Well, that situation is similar to a locker room situation. You're both guys and both have the same equipment, so it will probably work itself out as a normal occurrence.

    But, the question is, if you are accustomed to being naked in the kitchen, living areas of the house, will your roomie be uncomfortable with that?

    I think that walking around in your boxers is a no-brainer. Guys shouldn't care. It's done all the time by TV characters, and it's no different than being dressed. (You see more on the textile beach.)

    But, total nudity is something else..... You really should have a talk with him. When the time is right, just ask him how he feels about it.

    We're socialized to equate nudity with sex. But, casual nudity is the most normal thing in the world. I, too, am nude as much as possible in my own home.

     
    #4 LittleDicky, Nov 3, 2011
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2011
  5. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    I guess it will sort itself out. I mean, we'll be sharing the bathroom and I'll be damned if i will be dressed to walk from bedroom to bathroom. I mean, that's a naked walk if I ever knew one. The house is a small 1960s house where his bedroom and my bedroom are back to back and the doors are next to each other. The bathroom door is next to his bedroom do so my walk will be maybe 4 feet. His might be 2 feet. But if I see him wearing pajamas I'll know I'm in trouble. LOL I don't know what PJs are!!
     
  6. exwhyzee

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    I've become a pragmatic nudist...which is to say I prefer to be naked when getting out of bed headed to the bathroom...or returning from the gym showers to the lockers to get dressed...or in some circumstances that require nudity like a sauna. I'm not one to watch tv naked...or cook naked...or chat online naked. To me, that seems unnecessarily cold or dangerous (in the case of cooking!).

    So when I am around others...I like to stick to my routines...even when those routines involve nudity, but I can empathize with others who might have discomfort with my nudity. Case in point, I recently shared a room on vacation with a good friend and his partner. When we were making arrangements for my visit, I wrote to him that I would skip the nudity if they shared a room with me, and in the end I did just that. It was no problem at all. If we became long-term roommates...then my one-time allowance of avoiding nudity would become a permanent change of habit, and I wouldn't be willing to do that. If he/they couldn't live with that then we might not be compatible as roomies.

    So...I'd say you have to be careful in choosing who to live with so that you have sympathies in various areas...such as sleep patterns, entertainment preferences, privacy concerns, and nudity.

    As for the sexual part...sex (for me) requires attraction. If I'm not attracted to someone then sex isn't likely to happen. If I am attracted to them and they don't feel the same way about me then sex isn't likely to happen. If we are both attracted to each other...then more power to us. So sexualizing nudity between roommates doesn't concern me as much as overall compatibility.
     
  7. jameslpsg

    jameslpsg Member

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    I'd say just ask him. Why not. He seems pretty open so far.
     
  8. matelalique

    matelalique Active Member

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    I'm a gay man living with two straight men in their 30s. We do shirtless and boxers around the house quite a lot, but penis displays are rare. I've lived with housemates where casual nudity was fine, and I certainly suspect that nudity from the bed to the shower would cause offence only to the most prudish.

    Ease into the boxers, and then "normal" nudity (ie shower to bedroom). If he's cool then return in your towel to watch the TV with balls hanging out. You should be able to judge his comfort level. If you are any decent judge of reactions, and he is cool with this, then it might be the time to bring it up.

    If he gets up every five minutes to get a drink of water, then you have your answer.
     
  9. D_Cock_Hudson

    D_Cock_Hudson New Member

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    I agree with the suggestion of talking to him.
     
  10. erratic

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    My suggestion is to talk it out after you figure out whether you two are compatible roommates to begin with. If you guys get along well, then why not bring it up? If you don't get along well I'm guessing you'll be looking for another roommate anyway, so why bother bothering about the nudity thing with this guy?
     
  11. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    I'm committed for 6 months. I'm sure it won't take long to know his (and my) comfort level.

    In the meantime, I got an email from another guy who offered a room and said that he's a nudist so I'd have to be ok with that. I wrote him and told him I was already settled but we'll stay in touch in case 6 months from now it didn't work out.
     
  12. erratic

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    Well then, there's your plan B :)

    Good luck.
     
  13. Silvertip

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    In the beginning, were I you, I would have searched for a roommate through one of the nudist organizations so there never would have been a question. But given the current circumstance I'm guessing that you can soon get to know the guy well enough to know whether you can talk to him about it or just simply go nude and then comply with whatever his response might be to that.

    I once had a very good friend (straight) with whom I would share a room while on hunting trips. He was totally straight but always slept in the nude and puttered around the room nude before showering and dressing. He knew me well enough to know that I would either have no problem with that or I would ask him to cover up. I had no problem with it and followed his lead with my own nudity in those situations.
     
  14. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    Yeah, I figure it will work itself out. As I mentioned earlier, we'll be sharing the bathroom and I won't be shy about going/out naked. It's the walk to the kitchen that might bother him. But I figure before taking my shower one morning, I'll walk to the kitchen to start the coffee and stay naked when I go pour a cup. If he has a problem with any of it, I'm sure he'll speak up.
     
  15. B_chinagirl4u2

    B_chinagirl4u2 New Member

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    nudism is great we often go to nudist beaches and very often are nude at home. Good luck hope it works out with your roomate.
     
  16. Pierced1953

    Pierced1953 New Member

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    I think being honest with him about nudity.I once rented a room while working out of town with a couple.Though I wasn't there much I told them I was a nudist and would keep it to the bedroom.After a couple of weeks they both got curious and asked if I minded if they gave it a try and we all were naked.It didn't take but the first time and they loved it,though the man sported an erection I made no big deal about it.

    There was no sex involved and I think it improved their sex life.Many times after they returned from the bedroom [obviously had sex they were ],they would be dressed and I naked.They also dressed when having dinner and I with respect dressed also.They told me that I did not have to dress.It worked out well and they did visit a nudist club after I had left.

    I think nudity to most is not a big thing,but I've always been honest about my lifestyle.I have also rented to people in my home and never did it come to sex.I've some really great times being a nudist with non nudists.
     
  17. azladd

    azladd Active Member

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    I'm not understanding your definition of a "true nudist" and how it relates to a guy having pics on an erection and wearing a cock ring. Everyone is different, but to be, being nude and what a person does when they are nude are two different things.Perhaps the guy is a real nudist and a simple discussion about what your expectations were would have been fine enough. But now you have a roommate who you're not sure would be comfortable with seeing you naked? Its always best to be upfront with people that way there is no confusion.
     
  18. EllieP

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    I wouldn't call my husband and me nudists, but we are probably unclothed the majority of the time we're in our house and backyard. But with company we are very conventional, and I wouldn't dare ask anyone to follow our "house rules." That's for us, not everyone else.

    Cap had a habit of doing the naked walk to the kitchen to make coffee each morning before we were married. Well, bringing my 11-year-old daughter into the home quickly put the kibosh to that. Not because I told him either, he just knew better.

    Nudity is a very personal thing to me and not a lifestyle I want to evangelize others into. It's not about sex, but it does conjure up those kind of thoughts to the outside looking in, heaven forbid.

    Good luck in finding a resolution, but it sounds to me like you'll be modifying your behavior until you find more agreeable lodging.
     
  19. Hoss

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    You should be honest up front at the start let him know there are times you will be completely naked because that is who you are. It could be really bad if he thinks being in undershorts is the most it will ever be and then finds you go beyond that, it could be even worse if you 2 are getting along well as roommates and he then decides he wasn't be given all the truth and the rooming situation ends abruptly.

    It should only be something sexual if that is what both of you are aiming for. I am comfortable in front of others nude, even people I don't know and also casual friends, nothing sexual about it, ever.

    Again I advise that you tell him right away that you will be completely nude at times, don't just spring it on him one afternoon by wandering around straightening things and dusting without a stitch of clothing on.
     
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