Nursery rhymes we didn't have as kids........

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by BUSTERHYMAN, Oct 29, 2010.

  1. BUSTERHYMAN

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    NURSERY RHYMES WE DIDN'T HAVE AS KIDS........






    Mary had a little pig,
    She kept it fat and plastered;
    And when the price of pork went up,
    She shot the little bastard.


    ********************



    Mary had a little lamb.
    Her father shot it dead.
    Now it goes to school with her,
    Between two hunks of bread.
    ********************



    Jack and Jill went up the hill
    To have a little fun.
    Stupid Jill forgot the pill !
    And now they have a son.
    ********************



    Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
    Said Simple Simon to the pie man,

    "What have you got there?"
    Said the pie man unto Simon,
    "Pies, you dumb ass"
    ********************


    Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
    All the kings' horses,
    And all the kings' men.
    Had scrambled eggs,
    For breakfast again.
    ********************



    Hey diddle, diddle, the cat took a piddle,
    All over the bedside clock.
    The little dog laughed to see such fun.
    Then died of electric shock.
    ********************



    Georgie Porgy pudding and pie,
    Kissed the girls and made them cry.
    And when the boys came out to play,
    He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
    ********************



    There was a little girl who had a little curl
    Right in the middle of her forehead.
    When she was good, she was very, very good.
    But when she was bad........
    She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.










    [​IMG]
     
  2. tgirlsrgreat

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    Photo
    :lmao::haha:
     
  3. accemb

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    Jack and Jill went up the hill
    they each had a quarter.
    Jill came down with fifty cents.
    They didn't go up for water.
     
  4. B_stanmarsh14

    B_stanmarsh14 New Member

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    Mary had a little lamb,
    She could not stop it grunting,
    She took it down the garden patch,
    And kicked it's fucking cunt in.
     
  5. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    Little Miss Muffet,
    Sat on her tuffett,
    Eating her curds and whey,
    along came a spider, she immediately fired,
    Cause Miss Muffet's in the NRA.
     
  6. BUSTERHYMAN

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    Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke a little leaf, Jack got high and dropped his fly and Jill said "Where's The Beef?"
     
  7. chicagosam

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    Jack and Jill went up the hill
    To frolic in the water.
    Jack got hard
    And slammed her hard
    And kept on cumming after.
     
  8. BUSTERHYMAN

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    Jack be nimble,
    Jack be quick,
    Jack jumped over the candlestick.
    But Jack wasn't nimble,
    And Jack wasn't quick,
    So Jack went home with a charbroiled dick!
     
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