Okay to ditch friends for hookups?

Catharsis

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Personally, I would not be offended.

I think so many people go out and hookup, that it just becomes such a common theme and that it wouldn't be seen as unusual to go separate ways at the end of the night.

But if the general (unspoken) rule is that you go out together and you come home together, then yeah, going home with someone else would be odd. I don't know if being offended is the right word. I do think, however, that they should let you know. If they just assume you know, and therefore they don't tell you anything, then yeah I think that'd be rude.
 

Sayejan88

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I agree with Catharsis about that one. If someone is supposed to go out with you to have a good time, then do it. Don't just ditch them for a hook-up, wait til the party then leave with them!
 
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Who on earth would even THINK of ditching a friend? There are lots of things you shouldn't do in life, and this is one of them.
 

FuzzyKen

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There are too many unknowns in the question. Who was driving? Did the person who was left have a way to get home?

If the transportation were no problem in any manner then I would see the only problem as being the relationship between the friends. If they are both prone to going out with each other to make hookups with others then that is their agreement.

Again too many unknowns to give this a 100% answer.
 

crushinonted

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Went through this a few weeks ago and I was pissed. Your time is the biggest gift you can give someone and for them to throw it away for a few minutes of random, meaningless fun... I think it speaks volumes, but maybe I'm just overly sensitive.
 

regularguy

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He and I have a history, although brief. We've hooked up, and I want more but he does not. Therefore, it kind of hurts me more than it should, I guess, that he is out looking for other guys right in front of me. I know we're just friends now, but because I'm the one who is rejected by him, so to speak, it just kind of stings.

I'd rather he focus on our friendship when we're together and hook up when we're not together.
 

dccane

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I think it sounds like you might not really be ready to be his friend. I was in a similar situation and I tried to be just friends with the guy who rejected me, but it was too painful every time he went off with someone else. I have been keeping my distance and trying to get over him. I do want to be friends at some point, but I can't yet. I think you should do the same.

In a situation where it really is two friends on an equal footing, I think it is fine for one friend to go off and hook up if they are not leaving the other person stranded or in some other bad situation. But it depends... If someone took me out for my birthday and left me to go hook up, it wouldn't make me feel great to be honest. Also, if I had a friend that did this to me constantly, it would get annoying I guess.
 
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MisterSlave

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It depends on the situation. . and say, if my friend invited me out for the evening across town somewhere and was my ride. I think that would be both rude and would strand me in a location.

I am not one to stand in the way of 2 people being happy, or a relationship. However, If: someone invites you out, Is the driver, and then decides to ditch you and strand you. . yeah. . I'd probably have a problem with that. . and worse still. . if they ditched me and did not say anything to me about it at all. . At, that point that is just immature and retarded.

Misterslave.
 

josh20hung

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Are you sure you are upset because he is being a bad friend? Or are you upset because you are a bit jealous? For me, I guess it depends on the situation, but for the most part, I'd be happy for my bud, and would figure something out. I wouldn't take it as him being a bad friend, or at a diss towards our friendship.
 

KuronoB

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Would you be offended if your friend met someone while you were out and ditched you to hook up with him?

Probably not, as long as I had other friends to hang out with instead at the same time. If it was just me and a friend, that would be a problem, but if just one of 5 friends left, that would be ok. Also, it might be something to be happy about; many guys, myself included, have gone to bars/clubs in groups in hopes of meeting others, so it might not count as being ditched.
 

regularguy

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Yeah, honestly I think it really only hurts because I know he's out looking for someone and he does not want that someone to be me. Rejection just does not feel too good. I think Dccane nailed it.
 

erratic

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Yeah, I think it's pretty bad form to ditch someone like that, unless there's an understanding between you that it's okay. Personally, I see it like going out with one friend, seeing another friend, and then hanging out with the other friend instead. Ow.
 

Amaethon

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Since I'm not a selfish slut, no I wouldn't ditch a friend for a hook up that would never happen. Honestly, how bad of a friend do you have to be to ditch someone period?