One Night Stands

european_curious_guy

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Hi guys,

I wonder if someone has the same experience as me. I'm a gay guy and I use apps like Grindr and Romeo to find sexual dates. The problem is that I wish for a regular fwb/regular fuckbuddy but I really rarely have interest to have sex with the same guy past the 3rd encounter. 98% of the time I never make it past the first encounter (sometimes not because I'm not interested to but the other guy does not want to meet anymore)

Somehow most of the time I simply lose interest after the first encounter.

Does anyone have problem with finding a longer term fuck buddy/fwb? Why do I lose interest quickly for most of the time?

Thanks guys :)
 

Ki_re478

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I mean, if looking for something more serious I would recommend other avenues other than Grindr lol, if you're on there its usually just for sex (although there are exceptions I suppose).

Another suggestion would be to not necessarily have sex on the first date; get to know someone first and then it will be easier to maintain interest after having sex.
 

SamMann75

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If you hit it and quit it and beat feet on the street then you either both have to blow each other's minds or it's a one and done.

Any FWB I've ever had, or friends of mine had were really more then just sex hook ups. If the sex isn't amazing for both of you then there had to be something to keep the person engaged. I had this chick, the sex was amazing... for me. She said the sex was good, but she was only fucking me because i either made an incredible dinner before fucking or a to die for breakfast the next morning.

2 years this girl showed up any time i called to sucked and fucked me sideways because I'm an incredible cook and good enough in bed.

What are you offering besides a thanks for the fuck I'll lock the door on my way out. Put down the grinder and learn to interact on a human level. Doesn't mean you have to marry the guy, just be human
 
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cedarizzo

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I mean, if looking for something more serious I would recommend other avenues other than Grindr

I agree that Grindr probably isn't the best place to be looking for a LTR. But honestly, if you are feeling the need to meet with the other guy after 1 or 3 hookups, then they aren't the guy for you. When you meet the guy you want to see again and again and again and again steadily, that is they guy you want a LTR with.
 

WilliamG

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My view? These are some of the cracks appearing in the modern social media made connections. Many of us grew up in a non electronic world. Your first encounters with a person was face to face. One would never tell them their sexual preferences and wants in the first few words. There would be an introductory phase where nuance can be seen and heard. One of my pastimes is reading online ads for hookups. In the first line,"I'm a bottom". "Lets meet and suck cock...". It's easy to talk like this behind a keyboard. To me it lends itself to the "hit it and quit it" crowd (which is a lot now). We become accustomed to quantity and specific sexual acts with the flood of online options. I think socializing in face to face environments is missing here. Perhaps finding a group of like minded folks in say a Meetup group could be a better alternative?
 
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223790

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For me, I have to be more interested what the person (girl or guy) has going on between their ears rather than between their legs to maintain interest in them. I have a bit of situation going on that I honestly have no idea what will come of it. This guy, 30 years my junior, is my fitness instructor. He's hot as hell, but what turns me on the most about him is his intelligence and amazing personality. We seem to be getting closer and closer because we always chat after class naked in the open shower and at our lockers. He sees me in my full glory several times a week, and me in his. He's very cute and sexy, and for some strange reason he seems to be really into me (daddy issues?). He always flashes me a sexy grin in class, and ignores all of the attention he gets from the ladies in class. I saw one attractive lady look at him then me once in class with a puzzled look because of the sexy grins he kept shooting me. I take 3 of his classes weekly, and look forward to being naked and chatting with him after every class. I think about him constantly, and masturbate thinking about him and I together regularly. Compare this guy to another insanely hot guy who I chat and shower with regularly. He's cute and sexy as fuck with the most perfect body and cock I have ever seen, but he has nothing going on between his ears. He's as dumb as a bag of rusty hammers, and doesn't have much of a personality. He's hotter than my fitness instructor looks wise, but I'm way more attracted to my fitness instructor. IMO, the brain is the most powerful sex organ. I don't know if this helps or not. I agree with most posters here that it has to be more than a wham bam thank you man if you want it to continue.
 
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ohiorod

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For me, I have to be more interested what the person (girl or guy) has going on between their ears rather than between their legs to maintain interest in them. I have a bit of situation going on that I honestly have no idea what will come of it. This guy, 30 years my junior, is my fitness instructor. He's hot as hell, but what turns me on the most about him is his intelligence and amazing personality. We seem to be getting closer and closer because we always chat after class naked in the open shower and at our lockers. He sees me in my full glory several times a week, and me in his. He's very cute and sexy, and for some strange reason he seems to be really into me (daddy issues?). He always flashes me a sexy grin in class, and ignores all of the attention he gets from the ladies in class. I saw one attractive lady look at him then me once in class with a puzzled look because of the sexy grins he kept shooting me. I take 3 of his classes weekly, and look forward to being naked and chatting with him after every class. I think about him constantly, and masturbate thinking about him and I together regularly. Compare this guy to another insanely hot guy who I chat and shower with regularly. He's cute and sexy as fuck with the most perfect body and cock I have ever seen, but he has nothing going on between his ears. He's as dumb as a bag of rusty hammers, and doesn't have much of a personality. He's hotter than my fitness instructor looks wise, but I'm way more attracted to my fitness instructor. IMO, the brain is the most powerful sex organ. I don't know if this helps or not. I agree with most posters here that it has to be more than a wham bam thank you man if you want it to continue.

ditto....ditto and ditto. Very well stated and I fully agree!
 
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halcyondays

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You lose interest because they're just hookups. That's the point of hookup apps. Being honest that you're not interested in more with most of your partners is a good thing.

If you're looking for a more substantial relationship use hookup apps less and dating apps more. Be picky. Be selective. Define what you want in a partner and filter for it.:cool:
 
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